Memories Of No Value

LATER IN YEARS OF TIME

CHAPTER 6: Memories Of No Value

Zachary looked at her in confusion and asked with a teasing tone, "Oh? Did you finally realize your mistake, Miss Audrey?" He giggled at her in which she turned her head away and sighed, depressed.

"You know, it was a mistake and I really regretted that. It was done due to impulsiveness, and besides, I was afraid to leave people behind. It was not that I wanted to die without loving my family, I just had the thought that if I do that, the pain would lessen for everyone and I will be at ease." She bowed her head and sighed once again.

Zachary looked at her bowed head and asked with a low voice. This time, he was not teasing her but advising her,

"I might not have been in your situation, but I try hard to understand what you must have felt before. If I was you, I would have done the same way so I couldn't fully blame you. I am actually in disbelief that you are well, grumbling and humphing in front of me now, but on the other hand, I am in deep relief that you are well, that you are still alive, and most importantly, that you are doing better." He put his hand on her back and patted her, as if telling her that she did very well, not only now but the throughout the years that she battles with her disease.

Audrey smiled at him and said, "But even though I justified my actions, I still want to apologize because I have put stress to Mother and father. I did not mean it but recalling what I have done, they must have been in dilemma, trying to make me feel better. They even had sleepless nights for sure. Argh, I am so annoyed at myself now." She put her hand over her forehead and sighed in distress.

Zachary let out a small laugh and seconded her thought, "That is right. You added stress to them. But do not worry, they know that you are also doing your best so what you did was nothing but something that will put your mind at ease. They understood that it must have been hard for you to come this far, so right now, I am sure they are showing-off about you all the time."

And with her careful and slow question, she asked, "Uhm… do you think they are mad at me?"

He shook his head and assured her, "Do not worry. They are not mad if you. If anything, it is because they are worried about you that much. Ah, before I forgot, you, do not forget to apologize to them because of your actions. I know that what you did was pure because of concern for us However, mother almost had a heart attack when she was informed that you were about to die. Even father was about to lose his mind." He nodded his head as he said so as if recalling that exact moment.

Audrey nodded her head and thanked him, "Thank you, Zach."

He was a bit taken aback with his slightly opened eyes, looking at her, "That was the first time after a long time." He chuckled and shook his head.

She also giggled and asked him, "Did you miss me calling you that?"

Zachary wetted his lower lip and told her, "That is preferable than what you called me, 'Zay.' That nickname really sucks."

Audrey stood up, looking at him with her disbelief expression. It was as if telling him how dare he tell that how she nicknames him sucks.

"Hey! Did you know how much time I consumed just so I could come up with a pretty and cute nickname for you?!"

Zachary waved his hand and crossed his arms, saying with an emotionless face, "Hey, why would I like that kind of nickname? It sounds so feminine!" He grumbled, couldn't imagine himself being called with a such nickname.

"Are you criticizing feminine stuff?"

He sighed in helplessness and said to her, "Audrey, are you really going to act this way? This is only about the nickname. We hadn't seen each other for a long time yet you already want to fight with me." He touched his forehead and felt his head ache for a moment. He gritted his teeth gently and told her, "How about you finish your meal before you get angry at me? Look, the meal is already cold. Ha…."

Audrey, after hearing him, suddenly flinched and was regretful. Right. In her past life, she remembered that even until the end, Zachary didn't like the Zay nickname she gave him because it sounds cute when he wanted his nickname to be cool and masculine. She just wanted to refute that it sounds cute, she only wanted him to at least say that Zay was a cute nickname.

Coquettishly, she pouted gently and sat across him, looking closely at his expression.

***

Sometimes in your life, there would be things that you would be grateful for and some things are inevitable to be just a mistake for someone's life. As for Audrey, she felt this moment both of the said emotions. She felt grateful that she turned back time but at the same time, she felt sad that the person she relied on the most in her last life will look at her like a stranger.

It has been a month since she woke up and she was still in the Hospital, the only difference was she can walk around with a nurse or with someone who will accompany her. She forgot that there was someone she wanted to see not only her family. Someone that she wanted to express the words, 'I missed you so much!'

She has shared enough memories with him to say that he is her boyfriend, but they were never in an official or in a serious relationship. She doesn't know if he felt the same as hers, but she could feel that a tad of interest was given to her. He did confess but she had to reject it because she couldn't accept something that she would be unable to keep in a lifetime. She still remembered that time,

["Let me be your sunlight and hope, Audrey."

"Hope? Sunlight? Hudson, the sunlight I see has no light and there was never a sun in the light I see."

Hudson looked at her, "I want to be with you, Audrey. What am I supposed to do if you leave me here alone?"

Audrey shook her head in bitterness, "Shut it. Don't make me hope..."

"I am doing that now."

"So, stop it! Hudson, you already know what is happening. Stop being a kid and accept!" Audrey yelled at him, having snapped her patience.

Hudson's eyes slightly widened as he gulped from shock.

"Audrey...."

"Hudson, stop making me think there is hope. You can clearly witness how wretched my situation is."

"And I will never let you go, Audrey."]

It was not something she could easily say to him. Besides, this is her second life, so he doesn't know her, even for a little. For him, she was a stranger. She lowered her head and felt the wind brush against her skin. It somehow commemorated how she felt. She felt cold but his warmth was not here to make it feel better.

She looked at the sky and right at that moment, the nurse behind her said,

"Miss, it is time for you to take your medicine. Let us go down and drink your medicine. Moreover, the wind is getting stronger so I am afraid it will rain. Let us now find your shelter, Miss."

Audrey narrowed her eyes at the word, 'Shelter.'

In the past, he used to be her shelter whenever it rains, whenever anything bad happens to her. Would the same happen this time? She was given this second opportunity to right what she had done wrong in the past. She doesn't mean that she will barge into his house and ask his hand for marriage, on the contrary, she wanted to work hard and… might just as well focus on herself rather than finding him.

All she had about him were their memories. Even if she remembers them all, they do not value anything because he does not have the same case. Even if she yells that they loved each other in the past, he would never believe her. In the worst case, he would claim that she has gone crazy.

In that exact moment, she lowered her head and walked past someone and she briefly heard the person say, in a low voice,

"… Aud… rey…"

She was frozen on the spot. When she turned her head, the rain fell to the ground and when their eyes met, she was stunned and speechless.

It was him.

The man she longed to see.

The man who made a promise with her.

"…. Hud… son…"