5.REGRET

"Absorbing bloodlines won't help me," I muttered, my voice low and filled with doubt.

"It won't just help—it will elevate your potential," the spirit replied calmly, her tone unwavering.

I looked at her skeptically, narrowing my eyes. "Don't I already have limitless potential?"

"No," she said firmly, shaking her head. "You possess only a thin bloodline. By absorbing others, you can strengthen your own and elevate your potential, allowing you to cultivate to higher stages."

I scoffed, folding my arms. "Maybe you shouldn't have remade me in the first place."

"Why? Do you wish you'd stayed dead?"

Her question hung in the air, heavier than I had anticipated. I hesitated, unsure how to answer. "I'm just... tired of the world," I admitted after a moment. "Maybe eternal rest wouldn't have been so bad."

The spirit's gaze softened as she regarded me. "You may lack motivation now," she said gently, "but you still have regrets, don't you? Don't you want to know why your parents abandoned you?"

I froze, the weight of her words slamming into me like a physical blow. "How do you know that?" I demanded, my voice harsher than intended.

"I looked into your memories," the spirit admitted, her tone steady but tinged with remorse.

I clenched my fists, my nails digging into my palms. "Don't push me. Stay out of my personal life," I snapped, the anger bubbling in my chest spilling over. Without waiting for a response, I stormed a few steps away from her, putting distance between us.

The anger burned hotter with each step, but I couldn't tell if it was directed at her or myself. Deep down, I knew the truth. I was furious with my parents. Even after becoming president—after achieving what many considered the pinnacle of success—I had scoured the world to find them, only to come up empty-handed. It was as if they had never existed beyond the day they abandoned me.

I took a deep breath, trying to steady myself. My emotions churned like a storm, but I knew I couldn't afford to let them consume me. *I need her,* I reminded myself grudgingly. *I wouldn't survive in this damn forest without her.*

Reluctantly, I turned back toward the spirit. She stood where I'd left her, watching me with an unreadable expression.

After calming down, I walked back toward her. "I'm sorry for getting angry," I said, my voice quieter now. "It was just... pent-up emotions."

"Don't worry," she replied, her tone gentle. "I'm sorry too—for looking into your personal life. I had to check to make sure you weren't an evil person."

Her words gave me pause. I studied her carefully, trying to gauge her sincerity. *Maybe she's encountered someone evil before—someone who forced her to be cautious.*

"Alright," I said finally, my tone softening. "But promise me you won't check my memories again without my permission."

"Don't worry. I promise," she said with a reassuring smile.

I nodded, feeling a small weight lift from my chest. "Okay, then. Let's get back to what we were doing before."

"Yes. Now, if you're ready, you can begin creating your mana core."

"Alright. I'll start meditating," I said, lowering myself to the ground.

I sat cross-legged, closing my eyes and taking a deep breath. The forest around me was eerily silent, save for the occasional rustle of leaves in the wind. I pushed the distracting thoughts out of my head, focusing instead on the energy in the environment.

It wasn't easy. The process was far harder than I'd anticipated. For ten minutes, I sat in stillness, straining to sense even the faintest trace of mana. It was like trying to catch a whisper in a storm—elusive and frustrating.

But then, finally, I felt it. A faint trace of energy brushed against my awareness, like a soft current in a vast ocean. A sense of wonder washed over me. The colorful energies danced in the air like ethereal ribbons, vibrant and alive. It was spectacular.

*Now that I can sense mana, should I draw it toward me?* I hesitated. *Maybe I should ask the spirit first.*

"Hey," I called out, breaking the silence. "Do you have a name?"

"Yes," she replied, her voice warm. "It's Lumeria."

"Alright, Lumeria," I said, testing the name on my tongue. "I can sense mana now. Should I absorb it? And how do I even do that?"

"You can absorb mana while in a meditative state by drawing it toward you with your mind," she explained.

"Huh? Are you joking?" I asked, my brow furrowing.

"Not at all," she said calmly. "Stay focused. I'll help you gather a small amount to start, and after that, you'll be able to do it on your own."

"Fine," I said with a sigh. "But let's be quick. The sooner I figure this out, the better our chances of survival."

I closed my eyes again and resumed my meditative position. A moment later, I felt Lumeria behind me. Her hands gently touched my back, and an unfamiliar warmth spread through me.

"Concentrate," she instructed softly, her voice steady and reassuring.

I focused on the mana around me, trying to gather it. It wasn't easy. Even with her help, it felt like trying to move a mountain with nothing but sheer willpower. I gritted my teeth, determined not to give up.

The energy began to respond slowly, like a trickle of water finding its way down a rocky slope. With Lumeria's guidance, I managed to draw a tiny amount of mana toward me. After what felt like an eternity—though it was only fifteen minutes—I absorbed it.

I opened my eyes, breathing heavily, my body trembling from the effort. "That... was a lot harder than I expected," I admitted, wiping the sweat from my brow.

"It gets easier with practice," Lumeria reassured me, her tone kind. "This is only the beginning. In time, you'll be able to absorb mana effortlessly."

"You've already absorbed one bloodline. Maybe you should absorb more. With each one, your mana sensitivity will increase, making it easier to gather mana."

"Alright, let's do it," I said. "What bloodline should I absorb next?"

"You can absorb an ant's bloodline for earth affinity or a bird's bloodline for air affinity. The rest depends on your preferences."

"Alright, let's try to find an ant first. Can you locate them?"

Lumeria closed her eyes, focusing for a moment. "Found them," she said. "There's an ant colony five trees ahead."

I nodded, already moving. *The ant—a creature known to lift more than its weight. Maybe I can gain its strength too.*

"Hey," I called back to her. "If I absorb a bloodline, do I only gain its affinity, or do I get its abilities as well?"

"You get its abilities too," Lumeria answered. "For example, after eating the spider, you gained silk production and wall climbing."

I stopped in my tracks, startled. "If I got those abilities, why didn't you tell me? Maybe I could use the silk to make clothes or something!"

She tilted her head, looking genuinely puzzled. "I didn't think it was important. I thought you liked walking around naked."

I facepalmed, groaning in frustration. "Why am I even discussing this with you?"

Her innocence was almost endearing, but it didn't make the situation any less embarrassing. *First thing after this—I'm making some clothes,* I vowed silently.