emerge

The pain I've endured cuts deep into my soul, leaving wounds that seem impossible to heal. Losing a parent, I thought, was the pinnacle of heartache. Little did I know that there are depths of sorrow yet to be explored, aching even more fiercely.

But what adds salt to the wound is the heartless treatment from those I once called family. Instead of offering solace, they turned their backs on me, their disdain and belittlement piercing through my already shattered heart.

In the midst of this overwhelming despair, I find myself questioning my own desires. How can I dare to dream when I bear the weight of guilt, when I blame myself for the pain that engulfs me? The tears flow uncontrollably, a testament to the anguish that consumes my being.

Yet, amidst the darkness, a flicker of determination emerges. I refuse to let this pain define me. I refuse to let it extinguish the flame of hope within me. Though the storm has ravaged my life, I will rise from the ashes, stronger and more resilient.

I may not be able to change the past, but I can shape my future. I will honor the precious gift my mother bestowed upon me by embracing life with unwavering courage. I will seize every opportunity, cherishing each moment as a testament to her love and sacrifice.

I walked through the desolate streets of the broken city, each step a painful reminder of the devastation that surrounded me. The once thriving metropolis now lay in ruins, its buildings reduced to rubble and its streets stained with sorrow. The weight of guilt and grief hung heavy in the air as I navigated through the remnants of what was once home.

Whispers of blame and accusation echoed in my mind, tormenting my every thought. "You're the reason our comrades and your mother are gone," the haunting voices taunted. "Your decision to sneak them out led to their tragic fate."

The words pierced through my heart like a dagger, reopening wounds that had barely begun to heal. How could they believe that my actions had caused such immense loss? I had only sought to protect those I cared for, to give them a chance at a better life beyond the brokenness of this city.

"I never wanted any harm to come to them," I whispered, my voice trembling with anguish. "I thought I could lead them to safety, away from the horrors that consumed this place."

But their accusations persisted, relentless in their assault on my fragile state of mind. "Your actions were reckless," they hissed. "You led them into the very danger you sought to escape."

Tears streamed down my face as I stood amidst the wreckage, the weight of grief threatening to crush me. The loss of my comrades and the unimaginable pain of losing my mother felt like an unbearable burden. Yet, in the midst of the brokenness, a flicker of determination ignited within me.

"I understand your anger, your sorrow," I whispered, my voice filled with a mix of sorrow and resilience. "But blaming me won't bring them back. We must find a way to rebuild, to honor their memory by creating a better future."

But their voices continued to haunt me, echoing through the shattered city. "You're a failure," they sneered. "You couldn't protect them, and now they're gone."

The weight of their words threatened to consume me, to drown me in an ocean of self-doubt. But deep within, a fire burned. I refused to let their accusations define me. I had made choices based on love and hope, even if they had led to heartbreak.

"I won't let your accusations break me," I declared, my voice resolute amidst the broken city. "I will carry their memory in my heart and rebuild this shattered world. I will honor their sacrifice by creating a place where no one else has to suffer"

How cruel this world be, I'm only 17 and I'm suffering here alone.

It was 8 years ago. And that mistake keeps hunting me, I'm just a curious brat back then, and I feel sorry for what I've cost and 'till now I'm suffering for my consequences.