Halloween

  The video opens to show Peter's head as he hurries down a hallway. 

"Okay," he says quietly, still running. "It is almost Hallween, and I don't know if you guys know this, but Halloween is my favorite holiday. Ever. I mean, it's the one day a year it's socially acceptable to scare children, and even they won't hate you for it!" 

{cut}

Peter is now walking slower down a different hallway. 

"Okay, so I was kidding when I said that," he says sheepishly. "Mostly. I mean, it's fun to scare people, sometimes, as long as it's fun for everyone. But anyway, that's not what this video is supposed to be about. I am on my way to conference room 13B for a meeting with the team, Ned, and MJ. Thor is off world right now, so he's not going to be here, and Scott is hanging out with Cassie, but everyone else is here. Except for Mr. Stark; he's not gonna be there. I have a plan for a fun, harmless prank on him that won't hurt him in any way. Physically or emotionally. It'll be funny. He'll love it." 

{cut}

Peter is still filming himself, but now he's standing in front of a conference room. 

"Okay!" he exclaims, turning the camera around to show everyone sitting at a long, rectangular table. "I have gathered you all here today because I have a plan to prank Mr. Stark in a completely harmless, but still hilarious manner. As you all know, Halloween is coming up-"

"Are we gonna scare the **** out of him?" Clint asks eagerly, leaning forward. "Because if we are, I have a binder of ideas." 

"No, Clint, we are not gonna scare the **** out of him," Peter rolls his eyes. "We're just going to confuse him. Who here already knows what they're gonna be for Halloween?" 

No hands raised. 

"Really?" Peter shakes his head in disappointment. "Nobody has even a single idea for a costume? This is important, people!" 

"What's the point?" MJ asks. "We never do anything on Halloween."

"She's got a point," Ned nods. "I mean, nobody we know is having a party or anything, and we're too old to go Trick-or-Treating." 

"False," Peter declares, pointing at Ned. "First of all, you are never too old to go Trick-or-Treating. Secondly, as of two years ago, Stark Industries started holding a party of sorts on Halloween. Every employee, no matter how old, dresses up in costume and goes Trick-or-Treating around the tower. Usually, the team was the one handing out candy. However, this year, I have convinced Mr. Stark that it would be fun if we all dressed up and went out as well. So, he's paying teachers from my school to come hand out candy to a bunch of grown adults in costume, so we can go have fun." 

"Okay…" Steve says slowly. "I really don't see where this is going." 

"Well," Peter says. "The fact that none of you have any ideas works perfectly for my plan. We are all going to dress up as the same thing; Tony Stark himself."

The room is silent for a moment. 

"What." 

MJ is the first to speak, quickly followed by Pepper. 

"Peter, honey what are… what are you talking about?" 

Peter turns the camera around to face him again, and speaks directly into it. 

"They think I've lost my mind," he says, grinning brightly. "They think I'm going crazy. Honestly, if I was going to go entirely crazy, it wouldn't result in me dressing up as my adoptive father for Halloween." 

"What if I don't want to be Stark?" Bucky speaks up. 

Peter turns the camera around, and focuses on Bucky. 

"What do you want to be, then?" Peter asks. 

Bucky is silent for a moment, thinking, before his face breaks into a grin. 

"I," he declares dramatically. "Am going to go as the one thing that will add even more confusion to this already chaotic situation. Stark is going to walk out on Halloween night and find himself faced with twelve versions of himself… and one Pepper Potts." 

The room is silent for a split second as everyone takes in what he's said, before it erupts into laughter. 

{cut}

"So," Peter whispers, his face just a little too close to the camera. "It's Halloween. We've all been planning how to pull this off. Pepper and Bucky have already gone shopping and found a dress, wig, and heels that will fit him. He looks ridiculous in them, by the way, but also, somehow… fabulous. The rest of us need suits and sunglasses. We're drawing his beard on, because you can't have a Tony Stark without his iconic beard. We found some wigs that resemble his hair close enough for Natasha, MJ, and Wanda. I am on my way to meet up with Ned and MJ, because we're about to sneak into Tony's room and get suits and sunglasses."

{cut}

The screen is in black and white now, and is set up to look like an old security camera. We see half of Tony and Pepper's room; the half with the door to the hallway, and the door to Tony's closet. The footage is sped up slightly, and we see Peter, Ned, and MJ sneak into the room and into the closet. They're out of sight for a moment, before they reemerge. Peter and Ned are holding stacks of suits. MJ has an armful of Tony's iconic sunglasses. 

{cut}

"So," Peter declares, angling the camera so we can see him, as well as Natasha, MJ, Steve, and Clint behind him, all wearing various suits from Tony's closet. "We got the suits, obviously, and we leave in half an hour, so we've started getting ready. Bucky's struggling to get the dress on, so Steve is in the bathroom with him, helping with that, but everyone else is here and in a suit. We've just got to get everyone's hair looking right, and then MJ and Pepper are going to draw the beards on, because they're the only people who could do it satisfactorily when we tested a few days ago. So… let's get on with it!" 

{cut}

There's a time-lapse of the team going around and helping each other get their hair looking right, and then they sit in a line, and MJ and Pepper go down it, painting the beards on. Everyone is clean-shaven for the night.

{cut}

"It's time for Bucky's big reveal!" Peter exclaims, his voice filled with laughter. "Ready, Buck?" 

"Ready," Bucky says, and Peter turns the camera to show Bucky step out of the bathroom. 

He's wearing a long, blue dress, with a deep v-neck and a low, scoop back. He's wearing a ginger wig that falls down his back in soft curls, and Pepper has put on a full face of make-up. The fact that he hasn't shaved makes the whole thing look ridiculous. 

"Yass!" Peter exclaims, moving the camera around to act like a paparazzi. "Work it, Bucky!" 

Bucky strikes a few ridiculous poses as the rest of the team laughs from behind the camera. 

"Peter?" 

The room goes silent when Tony calls Peter's name. 

Peter looks panicked for a second, before calling back. "Yes?" 

"Are you guys about ready to go?" Tony asks, sounding like he's standing right outside the door. "It starts in just a few minutes. And I want to see these amazing costumes you've all been going on about." 

"What about yours?" Peter counters. "You've been going on and on about how I'm going to love your costume." 

"Well, unlock the door and you can see," Tony says. 

Peter glances behind him, before shrugging. "Alright. Friday, open the door." 

The door clicks and swings open. Tony enters the room, his hair messy, wearing a t-shirt with a science pun on it, and a pair of slightly baggy jeans. Peter's mouth drops, before he starts laughing. Tony stares around the room for a moment, looking completely baffled. 

"What is going on?" he finally asks. 

"We're all in costume!" Peter says cheerfully. "Don't you like them? We're all you!" 

Tony looks at him for a moment. "Who's he supposed to be, then?" he asks, pointing at Bucky. 

"Come on, now, Mr. Stark," Peter shakes his head. "Don't you recognize your own wife?" 

Tony stares at him. He stares some more. Finally, he breaks down into laughter. "Are you kidding me? There's twelve of me, but only one Pepper? I don't think Pepper could handle twelve of me." 

"Oh, no," Bucky shakes his head. "I only deal with one of you." 

He walks over to Steve and kisses him. Then Clint, Sam, and Rhodey start whooping and cat-calling. 

Tony rolls his eyes, still looking around the room. 

"Happy?" he exclaims. "Oh my god, Peter, how the hell did you get him to do this?" 

Peter shrugs. "I asked him nicely." 

"Oh my god." 

{cut}

"Oh, I almost forgot!" Peter exclaims. He crouches down, angling the camera to show Lady and Chloe. Lady is wearing a blue collar with a diamond-shaped pendant on it. Chloe has a pink bow around her neck, and one on her head as well. 

"These two are coming with us, obviously," Peter explains. "So we've got Lady, from Lady and the Tramp, and Marie, from the Aristocats! Sam said it was stupid to dress Lady like her namesake, but I think it's cute, and so does everyone else, so. Lady will follow us on her own, but Chloe likes to wander off, so…" 

Peter holds up a small basket. "We got her a ride! This will be my trick-or-treat bag, so she's just going to sit in there and guard the candy. You ready to go, Lady? Clo?" 

Lady barks excitedly. Peter picks Chloe up, and she immediately starts wriggling around as he maneuvers her into the basket. 

"Huh," Peter says. "It doesn't look like she wants to be in there. I'll just go grab her a treat, and she'll be fine. And then it's time to go get some candy! I bet we freak my teachers out." 

{cut}

"We're back," Peter announces, as he and the team leave the elevator into the common floor. "We've gone through the whole tower three times, and have enough candy to last us until next Halloween!" 

"Yeah, right," Tony snorts, rolling his eyes. "If that lasts you past next week, I'll be shocked, kid." 

"Geez, Mr. Stark, you don't have to expose me like this," Peter grumbles, but he's grinning. He turns back to the camera. "Well, we're all going to go hang out, watch some spoopy movies, each some candy and pie and other junk food, and just have some Halloween fun! Thank you all so much for watching this video! Please join the Ironfam, like and subscribe if you want to see more of… this. That's all for today! See you all later!" 

{cut}

Comments:

LessEmilyPlease: This is hilarious! Tony going as Peter while everyone else is him. Gold!

I'mJustTryingtoNotDie: Are Steve and Bucky together??? Why has that not been addressed? Absolute power couple!

SimplyRidiculous: Bucky as Pepper is Halloween costume goals. 

Bettybrant: I want to go trick-or-treating through Stark Tower!!!

DoritoGod: #Irondad