Goodbye, Ironfam

Note: This one is gonna be kind of long, with a lot of flashbacks and stuff. It's honestly mostly just scenes from previous chapters, but… it felt fitting. Anything in italics is a scene from a previous video. 

The video opens to Peter sitting on his bed. Lady and Chloe are lying beside him asleep. 

"Hey, Ironfam," Peter says, smiling lightly at the camera. "So… I've been doing this channel a while now, almost three years. And I've loved every second of it, believe me. But… life's happening. I turned 18 last month, and I'm a senior in high school, and I've applied for early admissions to college, and got accepted to study business, and minor in dance. After I graduate college, I'm going to take over Stark Industries. And just… between high school, and dance, and preparing for college and to take over the company, and Spider-Man, there's just… not enough hours in the day, you know?"

{cut}

Peter hasn't moved. 

"I had so many ideas for this channel," he laughs weakly. "And I am genuinely so sad to say goodbye to it. But I think it's time. Not only is my life crazy, but Ned, MJ, Harley and I are applying to college. Betty and Ismay are going to Germany to study abroad for the rest of senior year. Dad's busy with the team, and Mom's only a month and a half away from her due date for Hailey and Oliver. We're all getting ready to go our own ways, and with life's chaos… it's impossible to keep this up. I'm really sorry, because I love this channel and I love you guys, but I'm stretching myself too thin."

{cut}

"However, before I turn the camera off for the last time, I think we need a proper goodbye," Peter smiles. "So… let's have a montage, why don't we?" 

{cut}

Peter's standing in the living room, filming Natasha, who's sitting on the couch, reading a book. 

"Nat, it's time for our farewell to the Ironfam," Peter says. "What was your favorite video to film?" 

"Hm," Natasha thinks for a moment. "That's kind of hard, there were a lot of fun ones. I guess my favorite would probably be your sixteenth birthday, I really liked spending that day with you and watching Tony and Pepper adopt you." 

{cut} 

Peter and Natasha are standing outside, by a busy street. 

"Hey guys, welcome back to the Ironfam!" Peter says excitedly. "So, today is my sixteenth birthday, and first, a lot of you guys have been commenting on my social media, telling me happy birthday and stuff, and I just… thanks, guys! I'm not actually sure how you all knew, but whatever. It's nice!"

"I feel like you should be more concerned that they all know your birthday," Natasha says. 

Peter shrugs. "Eh, whatever. I don't care all that much. Anyway," he turns back to the camera. "Mr. Stark sent me out 'grocery shopping' with Nat, and he's trying to make me think that he and Pepper and everyone forgot it's my birthday, but Nat told me happy birthday as soon as we got out here, and also, I know he set an alarm on his phone just to make sure he didn't forget. Plus, he had to write it down, like, a million times when I came to live with him, so… I'm pretty sure he knows when it is. Which means he and Pepper are probably doing something secret up there that I'm not supposed to know about, but… that's their fault. They should be more sneaky." 

"Give them a little credit," Natasha says, laughing lightly. "They're trying." 

"Yes, I know they're trying," Peter says. "And I think that is very nice of them, and I am very excited to see what they come up with. I was merely pointing out that I don't know they're doing something because I snooped, I know because they're not sneaky." 

"Alright, fine," Natasha rolls her eyes. "Why don't you just tell them what we're doing today?" 

"Well, Mr. Stark told us to go grocery shopping, which we're gonna do," Peter informs the camera. "But first, we're going to go get lunch and ice cream, and then we're gonna go check out this farmer's market that's happening in this little park a couple blocks over. Then we'll get the groceries Mr. Stark told us to get, and that should be enough time for them to do whatever it is they're doing. So, let's get a move on!"

{cut}

"Natasha, look at this!" Peter exclaims, standing at a table at the market. 

Natasha looks up from the display she was looking at, and walks over to Peter. 

"Look, look!" Peter says, excitedly holding up an action figure. "They've got one of you! And of everyone else, but look! It's you!" 

Natasha smiles. "It's a very artistic rendering, too." 

"I know, right?" Peter says, smiling brightly. "We should get one. We should buy one of all of them. Everyone on the team needs to have an action figure of themselves. Oh my god, they have a Spider-Man-" 

{cut}

Steve is sitting at the counter in the kitchen. "My favorite video? Oh, I dunno… I guess the one where it was Halloween, and we all dressed up as Tony, except Bucky. That one was a lot of fun. 

"Yeah, that one was my favorite, too," Bucky announces, sitting on a barstool next to Steve. "Officially announcing our relationship and all. Sort of." 

{cut}

"Really?" Peter shakes his head in disappointment. "Nobody has even a single idea for a costume? This is important, people!" 

"What's the point?" MJ asks. "We never do anything on Halloween."

"She's got a point," Ned nods. "I mean, nobody we know is having a party or anything, and we're too old to go Trick-or-Treating." 

"False," Peter declares, pointing at Ned. "First of all, you are never too old to go Trick-or-Treating. Secondly, as of two years ago, Stark Industries started holding a party of sorts on Halloween. Every employee, no matter how old, dresses up in costume and goes Trick-or-Treating around the tower. Usually, the team was the one handing out candy. However, this year, I have convinced Mr. Stark that it would be fun if we all dressed up and went out as well. So, he's paying teachers from my school to come hand out candy to a bunch of grown adults in costume, so we can go have fun." 

"Okay…" Steve says slowly. "I really don't see where this is going." 

"Well," Peter says. "The fact that none of you have any ideas works perfectly for my plan. We are all going to dress up as the same thing; Tony Stark himself."

The room is silent for a moment. 

"What." 

{cut}

"It's time for Bucky's big reveal!" Peter exclaims, his voice filled with laughter. "Ready, Buck?" 

"Ready," Bucky says, and Peter turns the camera to show Bucky stepping out of the bathroom. 

He's wearing a long, blue dress, with a deep v-neck and a low, scoop back. He's wearing a ginger wig that falls down his back in soft curls, and Pepper has put on a full face of make-up. The fact that he hasn't shaved makes the whole thing look ridiculous. 

"Yass!" Peter exclaims, moving the camera around to act like a paparazzi. "Work it, Bucky!" 

Bucky strikes a few ridiculous poses as the rest of the team laughs from behind the camera. 

{cut}

"That was a good one," Peter nods. He pauses, looking a bit nostalgic for a moment, before seemingly shaking himself back to the present and turning around. The camera focuses on Clint, sitting at the table. "Clint?" 

"My favorite was definitely Eat it or Wear It," Clint nods decisively. "I do apologise for reportedly trying to kill you, though." 

Peter laughs. 

{cut}

Peter rolls the die. He watches it bounce around on the counter, before coming to a stop. Slowly, he stands up to look at it, and begins cheering. 

"A six! I win, Mr. Stark!" 

"Yeah, yeah, just pick a number, Peter." Tony sounds amused. 

Peter closes his eyes and sticks his hand into the bowl of paper. When he withdraws it, he unfolds it and shows it to the camera. "Eight. So now, we've just got to... find... the bag..." 

He stands up, checking all the bags, until Tony drops one in front of him. 

"Here," he says. 

Peter takes a deep breath, before reaching into the bag and pulling out a plate. On the plate is a white-ish, brown-ish meat. 

"Ew," Peter says, wrinkling his nose. "It's salmon." 

Tony looks at someone behind the camera. "Are you kidding me?" he asks. "We are both allergic to fish, Barton. What the hell." 

Someone, presumably Clint, is laughing behind the camera. 

"I'd better hope I get wear it, then," Peter says. "Hey, Siri?" 

His phone pings as Siri turns on. 

"One or two?" 

It's silent for a moment, before a British Woman's voice responds, "One." 

"That's eat it, Mr. Stark," Peter says solemnly. "It was nice knowing you." 

"Yeah, no way, kid," Tony says, pulling the plate away from him. Without giving Peter a chance to protest, Tony picks up the fish and smashes it onto Peter's hair. 

"Mr. Stark!" Peter whines. "You're not allowed to change what she says!" 

"I am if eating the food will literally kill you, Peter-"

{cut}

"Yeah, Dad was pretty pissed off at that one," Peter giggles. "Those first few videos really were a total **** show." 

{cut}

Peter is in the lab with Bruce. A lot of the surroundings are blurred out, apparently confidential information. 

"My favorite video?" Bruce thinks for a moment. "I mean, I wasn't actually in very many of them, but I did love Tony and Pepper's wedding. It was an honor to officiate for them, and it was a beautiful ceremony."

"Ah, the wedding," Peter sighs wistfully. "A three part video of chaos." 

{cut}

"Tell the Ironfam what else you've got on that paper," Peter prompts him. 

"Well, this is just the different roles everyone will play," Tony explains. "And we've already checked with everyone that it's fine. Rhodey's my best man, obviously, and then Steve, Thor, Clint, Happy, and Peter are groomsmen. Bruce is the officiate, because apparently he's allowed to do that and we'd rather it be someone we know. Bucky, Ned, Scott, and Cooper are ushers, because none of them wanted to be groomsmen and I don't really know them well enough for that." 

{cut}

Peter is in a room, decorated in a dark red, almost mahogany color, and white. Wanda is sitting at the desk, drawing something. 

"Wanda, what was your favorite Ironfam video to film?" Peter asks. 

"Oh, that's hard," Wanda says. "I think I'd have to say the gender reveals? Those were super fun, I loved them." 

{cut}

Tony is the only person in the frame. 

"So," he says, grinning lightly. "It's time for the gender reveal. Not even me and Pepper know what it is yet, so… it's a surprise for everyone. We didn't want to do the traditional pink and blue, so we each picked a color. Gold is for boy, blue is for girl. We told everyone to wear a color based on what they think it's gonna be. So… let's find out what everyone thinks?" 

{cut}

Everyone is lined up in front of the camera. In blue is Natasha, Wanda, Clint, Rhodey, Pepper, Ned, Bucky, and Steve. In gold is Sam, Vision, Thor, Bruce, Tony, MJ, Peter, Scott, and Happy. Chloe has a little blue bow on her head, and is being held by Peter. Lady has a gold bow, and is being held by MJ.

{cut}

Tony and Pepper are both standing beside a large black balloon covered in question marks, holding large needles. 

"We're gonna count down!" Peter calls out. "Pop it when we get to zero. Ready?" 

Everyone joins in counting. 

"Three!"

"Two!" 

"One!" 

Tony and Pepper read up in unison and pop the balloon. Blue confetti rains down, and the team erupts into cheers. Tony and Pepper hug and kiss. Tony appears to be crying. Peter runs forward to hug them. The frame is covered in darkness, but sounds are still audible, and Tony's voice can be heard. He's definitely crying. 

"It's a baby girl! We're having a little girl!" 

{cut}

Tony lights the smoke bombs, and the couple holds them up. Fire flares for a moment, before blue smoke starts billowing out the end. 

The group starts cheering. Peter is leaping up and down, obviously extremely excited. MJ, who's holding Morgan, comes to give him a hug, and Morgan climbs over to cling to Peter's neck, instead. 

The group chatters and cheers for a few moments, until Tony begins trying to get their attention. 

"Ok, ok, guys!" he shouts, and everyone slowly quiets down. Peter's standing beside the couple, Morgan still in his arms. 

"Obviously, you all know that Peter's filming for the Ironfam," Tony says. "And in a minute, the camera will be put away so we can have our little party. Pepper and I are unbelievably excited to be having a little boy, to give both Peter and Morgan, and basically Harley, too, a little baby brother. But before we put the cameras away, Peter… don't you think the Ironfam wants to know the gender of Baby B?" 

The rooftop is dead silent for a single, quivering moment. 

"Oh my god, it's twins?" Peter shrieks, and everyone descends into chaos again. 

{cut}

"Happy," Peter is running down a hallway. Happy is walking purposefully in front of him. "Happy, Happy, Happy-" 

Happy stops and turns. "What?" 

"Ok, this is my last video for the Ironfam," Peter says. "What was your favorite video that we filmed?" 

Happy shrugs. "I don't actually remember very many. The wedding was fun, though." 

"You're the second person to say wedding," Peter informs him. Happy rolls his eyes. 

{cut} 

A camera is set up behind Tony, giving a clear view of the aisle. Music swells, as Rhodey and Nat emerge, walking gracefully together. They're followed by Clint and Laura, Thor and Wanda, Steve and Maria, Happy and Hope, and Peter and MJ. Peter is, indeed, wearing sunglasses and an earpiece, looking uncharacteristically grim and serious. MJ is barely concealing her laughter, trying to keep a straight face. Laughter breaks out among the audience at the sight. Tony laughs, as well. As the bridesmaids and groomsmen reach the altar, they separate, the bridesmaids going to stand across from Tony, while the groomsmen stand behind him. Peter, however, follows MJ to the other side, standing just behind her, doing the job of a bodyguard very well. 

{cut}

Sam is sitting in an armchair in the living room. 

"Favorite video?" Peter asks him. 

"Oh, that stupid Sardines one was fun," Sam shrugs. "As was jousting Bucky in the lobby." 

"I still say you cheated," Bucky shouts from off camera. 

{cut}

"Alright, we lost Scott, and Sam and Bucky are duelling in the lobby," Peter begins. "So they're not here for the outtro. But anyway, I hope you enjoyed this video! It was super fun to film and everything. Like and subscribe if you want to see more of… this." 

"Seriously, kid?" Tony asks incredulously. 

"Yes, Mr. Stark!" Peter says enthusiastically. "It's our branding! Our outtro. What we say at the end of every video." 

Tony pinches the bridge of his nose. "Wonderful." 

{cut} 

Sam runs past the camera, a jousting stick tucked under one arm and two broomstick horses held aloft by the reins with the other. 

"I won!" he shrieks, as he sprints past. "I won!" 

Bucky follows closely, another jousting stick held straight out in front of him with his metal arm, which appears to be stuck. 

"No you didn't, you filthy cheater!" he bellows. "No you did not!" 

{cut}

"My favorite was the wedding," Rhodey says, sitting at the table across from Clint. "I was super happy for Tony and Pepper, and for all of you. I'd been waiting for that to happen for years." 

{cut}

The camera flashes through different photos of the reception. We see the table setup, which is round tables, blue tablecloths, gold dishes, and blue and gold napkins. There are flowers in the center of the table, accompanied by candles. There are more flowers on the backs of the chairs, with names woven into them. Blue and gold silk hangs in domes on the ceiling, with blue and gold paper in chains along the walls. There's tables of food, and the room is adorned in blue and gold balloons, paper flowers, and pom-poms. The little boxes of macarons are set out on a table near a door. 

The camera cuts to the cake, circling around it. It's massive, with over a dozen tiers. It's decorated with icing flowers and pearls, and a beautiful topper adorns the highest tier. Peter wasn't lying; it is a little extra, but it's beautiful. 

{cut}

Rhodey is standing up, reading off a paper. We only hear a piece of his speech. 

"Tony's been my best friend since college," he says. "When he was just a fifteen-year-old kid, too smart for his own good, and… well, I had to get him out of trouble, you know?"

{cut}

"Alright," Peter is sitting on Harley's bed, Betty and Ismay beside him. "What were you guys's favorite videos to film?" 

"That Q&A where we introduced Ismay," Betty says immediately. 

"That's what I was going to say!" Ismay laughs. 

"It was both of our first official videos with the Ironfam," Betty shrugs. "It was just a lot of fun." 

{cut}

"Right. First things first," Peter claps his hands together, and turns to the redhead and Betty. "Want to introduce yourselves?" 

"Sure," the girl shrugs, her voice still heavy with a French accent, and looks to the camera. "Hello, everyone. My name is Ismay Jacques. I just moved from Paris, and as of a few months ago I started attending Midtown High and dating Harley."

"My name is Betty Brant," Betty informs the camera. "I also go to school with these guys, and I am dating Ned." 

"So we put on Instagram for people to ask us questions for a Q and A, but obviously none of those included Ismay, and a bunch of them were just asking who she was," Peter explains. "And we went through comments on a bunch of videos and put together a list of seven questions for each of us. So… let's get started!"

{cut}

"Harley?" Peter turns the camera to show Harley sitting at his desk. 

"Mr. Dad Replaced Me with Some Kid From Tennessee," Harley laughs. "Impeccable title, wonderful energy, loved almost dying." 

Peter laughs. 

{cut}

"We're in the living room," Peter lifts the camera to show Tony, Natasha, Steve, and Bucky sitting behind him, as well as Pepper, who can be seen standing in the kitchen, bouncing Morgan. "We're waiting to meet Mr. Dad's oh so special surprise guest, who should be getting here right about-"

The elevator dings.

"Now!" Peter says brightly. "Alright, let's see who this is all about." 

Peter turns the camera to face the hallway that leads to the elevator. There's silence for a moment, before a teenage boy who looks to be around Peter's age with messy blonde hair enters the room. 

"Um, hello," The boy says, looking startled at the camera fixed on his face. "I did not consent to be filmed." 

"Relax, kid," Tony says, standing up and walking towards him. "Good to see you." 

"You too," the boy says, still giving the camera odd looks. 

"Alright, alright," Tony sighs. "Peter, this is Harley. Harley, this is Peter." 

"Oh, the boy you adopted a few months ago?" Harley asks. "Yeah, hi. I'm Harley. Nice to meet you." 

"You too…" Peter says, his hand appearing from behind the camera. The two boys shake hands. "So… how do you know Mr. Da- I mean, um, Mr. Stark?" 

{cut}

Both boys are out of breath, and seemingly walking quickly back to the tower. 

"Oh my god," Peter pants. "Oh my god. So, I was walking, right? And Harley was behind me. And as I'm just talking to you guys, I notice some guy following Harley, and right as I notice him, the guy just ******* grabs Harley from behind. So I panic, and run back to stop him, and I see him dragging Harley into an alleyway, a ******* knife at his neck." 

"I thought I was gonna die," Harley chimes in. "Seriously, it's like, the second time I've felt ridiculously close to death." 

"Yeah, it was insane," Peter nods. "So I start screaming at this guy, telling him to let Harley go and all that standard ****, and the guy just says 'give yourself up and I won't hurt pretty-boy here!'"

"First of all," Harley interjects. "If anyone ever calls me pretty-boy again, I will kill them. Second of all, why the hell would he expect Peter to just give himself up?"

"And also, what kind of idiot do you have to be to try to kidnap Iron Man's son and his friend?" Peter adds. "That's just… that's a new kind of stupid." 

"So Peter just rolls his eyes," Harley continues the story, as the two arrive at Stark Tower and cross the lobby. "And goes, 'yeah, sure, I'll do that.' So he puts his hands up and walks towards this guy, who shoves me away, and grabs Peter, and before me or the idiot know what's going on, Peter's punched him in the face and kicked him in the dick at the same time!" 

{cut}

"Also, I think it was pretty impressive that we managed to get grounded, what, three times in one week?" Peter says. 

"And we got some chaotic grocery shopping done," Harley nods. "And we got a dog." 

"Yeah," Peter sighs. "Lucifer. I miss him a lot." 

{cut}

Ned enters the room, the camera immediately fixated on his face. 

"Ned, what's your favorite video we ever filmed?" 

Ned pauses. "Um, your birthday, when you got Chloe. Your confusion that whole time was pretty funny." 

{cut}

Peter unwraps a large box from Ned, which turns out to be-

"A litter box?" Peter asks, giving Ned a strange look. 

Ned shrugs. "Eh. You never know, it could come in handy." 

Peter gives him an even stranger, confused look. "...thanks? I think?" 

{cut}

The time lapse ends with Clint handing Peter a large box, with a removable lid. Peter carefully takes the box into his lap, and opens it. Immediately, he gasps, and reaches inside to pull out a tiny white kitten. 

"Barton, you did not," Tony gasps, looking at the cat. 

"What?" Clint asks innocently. "Did you not see everyone else's presents? It was a team effort! Only you and Pepper didn't know about it, and MJ had already gotten the camera." 

"Oh my god, it's so cute!" Peter exclaims. "Is it a boy or a girl?" 

"It's a little girl," Clint explains. "She's a balinese, about nine weeks old." 

{cut}

"Ok, imagine it's your birthday, and you open a gift from your best friend, and it's a ******* litter box," Peter laughs. "I think I had a right to be confused!" 

{cut}

Peter is back on his bed, MJ sitting beside him. 

"My favorite video was when we were in Disneyland," MJ says. "And you asked me to prom. That was a super fun trip, and the start of our relationship." 

"Yeah," Peter looks wistfully nostalgic again. "That was great." 

{cut}

Someone is filming MJ standing in front of the castle. Tony is taking her picture, and she's got her arms thrown out to the sides. 

"Can I take one with you?" Peter calls. The camera can see the sign behind his back, but nobody else can. 

"Yeah, sure," MJ shrugs. 

Peter walks forward. MJ poses next to him, and Tony takes the picture, as Peter pulls the sign up and unfolds it. MJ stands still for a moment, before turning to look at him. 

"What is that?" she asks. "Why do you have a sign?" 

"Read it," Harley and Ned shout from behind Tony, laughter in their voices. 

MJ looks down and reads the sign aloud. 

"Will you be my princess at prom so we can live happily ever after together…" she reads. She turns slightly pink, but laughs. "Sure, loser. I'll go to prom with you." 

Peter gives MJ a hug, and Tony takes about a hundred more pictures.

{cut}

Peter is sitting on Tony and Pepper's bed, in between them. 

"Pepper, what was your favorite video?" 

"Oh, probably the whisper challenge," Pepper smiles. "I loved your reaction." 

"It was a pretty genius way to announce Morgan," Peter agrees. "That's one of the only ones I've gone back and watched, I can't believe how clueless I was." 

{cut} 

Peter is now at the head of the table, with Pepper next to him, and Tony next to her. 

"Alright, Peter…" Pepper looks down at Peter's phone in her hand. "It's nice to have black mice." 

"I got hit by a bus," Peter says, sounding completely confident in his answer. "Regina George, is that you?" 

"Why have you seen Mean Girls, Peter?" Tony asks, looking confused. 

"Why have you seen Mean Girls?" Pepper asks, turning to him. "For you to understand his reference, you'd have had to see it, too." 

"Okay, Mean Girls is a hilarious movie," Tony says defensively. "I just didn't think it was one Peter would have seen. No need to get all accusatory." 

"Guys!" Peter shouts. "Come on!" 

"Okay, okay," Pepper turns back to Peter. "It's nice to have black mice." 

"I guess I gotta drive a black bus?" Peter asks. 

"No," Pepper laughs. "It's not about a bus, okay Peter? No bus! It's nice to have black mice." 

"It's nessy grabbing a black… bus," Peter says, looking sheepish. 

Tony and Pepper both roll their eyes. "You're ridiculous, Pete," Tony sighs. 

"It's…" Pepper says, trying to go one word at a time. 

"Eeeeeeeee?" Peter shrieks questioningly. 

"Oh my god, Peter," Tony rolls his eyes. "You are the weirdest kid I know." 

{cut}

"Oh, hush, Tony," Pepper says. She gives him a look, and he settles down. "Okay, last one, Peter," she says. "I'm going to be a big brother." 

Peter gives her a blank look, completely confused. "I've got a pig for uncle mother?" 

Pepper laughs lightly. "No, Peter. I'm going to be a big brother." 

Peter still looks confused. "I've got a pig and funky weather. This doesn't make sense, Pepper! What are you saying to me?" he shrieks, throwing his head back dramatically. 

"I'm… going… to… be… a… big… brother!" Pepper exclaims, once Peter's looking at her again. 

"I've been a big bother," Peter says, before gasping and pressing a hand on his chest, giving Tony an offended look. "Mr. Stark! You said I could never bother you!" 

"You're bothering me now," Tony says, laughing. "Come on, Pete, try again." 

"I'm going to be a big brother," Pepper says. 

"I'm going to be a big brother," Peter says. 

"Yes!" Pepper nods. 

"Did I get it?" Peter asks. "I got it? Yay!" 

{cut}

"Tony?" Peter asks. 

"Either the wedding, or your 16th birthday, when we gave you the adoption papers," Tony says. "Those two will always be my favorites." 

{cut}

The music changes to the traditional 'Here Comes the Bride' and swells louder. The audience stands, as Pepper and her father begin to make their way down the aisle. 

Pepper looks stunning, in a long, white gown with a sweetheart neckline, with off the shoulder, short sleeves. The veil falls down her back in a beautiful cascade. 

{cut}

The camera angle has changed to be zoomed in on Tony's face. He's got tears in his eyes, as Pepper's father gives her away, and she joins him at the altar. 

{cut}

"Peter?" Tony says, setting the camera down on the counter so everyone is visible. "Pepper and I have one last thing we want to give you." 

"No!" Peter groans good-naturedly. "You all have already given me too much!" 

"One last thing," Tony promises. He and Pepper sit down next to Peter, and Tony pulls a folder out from behind his back, and sets it on the table in front of Peter. 

"What's this?" Peter asks, giving Tony a strange look.

"Well, open it and find out," Tony nudges him. "Go on." 

Peter slowly opens the folder, and lifts out the first paper. "It's a form…" he says slowly, looking at Tony questioningly. "It's some sort of form?" 

"Read the top, honey," Pepper says gently. 

Peter looks back at the paper. "Report of adoption..." he reads. He stares at it for a moment longer, before he drops the paper, folds his arms, and puts his head in them. His shoulders start shaking; it's apparent that he's crying. 

{cut}

Peter is sitting on the living room floor, coloring with Morgan. Tony's voice speaks from behind the camera. 

"Pete, you never told us what your favorite video was." 

Peter looks up at the camera, looking completely lost. "Well… I don't have a favorite. I've loved them all." 

{cut}

The video opens with Tony and Peter standing behind a counter. They are apparently in Tony's kitchen, on the penthouse level of Stark Industries. There are several numbered bags lined up in rows around them, as well as a bowl full of slips of paper. 

"Hey, guys!" Peter says excitedly. "My name is Peter Parker, and this is Mr. Stark," 

{cut}

"Hello, everyone!" Peter waves cheerfully at the camera. "Welcome back to the Ironfam! Sorry, I had to explain branding to Mr. Stark, which is weird because you'd think he'd know all about that, what with owning his own company and all -"

{cut}

The video opens to show Peter and Tony sitting behind the kitchen counter. Two blenders are sitting next to them, and twenty bags are next to those. 

"Hey guys!" Peter says brightly. "Welcome back to the Ironfam! Today, Mr. Stark and I are doing the smoothie challenge!" 

"Why do I keep allowing you to talk me into eating weird things?" Tony sighs. 

"I don't know. I've wondered that myself."

{cut}

"Hey guys, welcome back to the Ironfam!" Peter exclaims, waving at the camera. "Today, Mr. Stark and I are going something I totally do not want to be doing." 

"Oh, shush," Tony waves Peter off. "Today we're going to Target, and we're going to be doing the 'Buying Anything Peter touches while Blindfolded' challenge." 

{cut}

The video now shows Tony and Pepper sitting at a restaurant table. Peter appears to be on the other side. 

"Welcome back to the Ironfam!" he exclaims, flipping the camera around to show himself and giving a big smile. "We're out at a restaurant, I cannot disclose its location because that's a bad idea, but it's one of Pepper's favorites. Say hi to the Ironfam!" 

He turns the camera back to Pepper, who smiles and waves. 

{cut}

The video opens to Peter sitting on the couch in the living room. 

"Hey guys, welcome back to the Ironfam!" he exclaims. "So, if you saw the last video I posted, you'll know that Mr. Stark and Pepper are getting married. Now, that video actually took place a while ago, around the time of us filming… sardines? I think? Which was actually, like, six months ago, which is a little crazy.

{cut}

The video opens to a photo of Tony and Pepper standing together. Pepper is wearing a beautiful white dress with a long, elegant veil. Tony is wearing a blue tux, with a gold vest underneath and a gold bowtie. Words are written in cursive across the bottom of the photo.

Tony Stark and Pepper Potts

Married August 15, 2018

{cut}

The video opens to Peter, Tony, and Pepper sitting at the kitchen table. Tony is at the head, then Peter and Pepper are next to each other on his left. 

"Hey guys!" Peter says brightly, waving at the camera. "Welcome back to the Ironfam! As you all probably know, Mr. Stark and Pepper got married about a month ago, and they got back from their honeymoon last night. I know, right? Their honeymoon lasted a month. 

{cut}

The video opens to Peter and Tony sitting at the kitchen counter, a straight line of makeup spread in front of them. Tony looks annoyed and resigned; Peter looks thrilled. 

"Hello everyone, welcome back to the Ironfam!" he exclaims. 

{cut}

Peter and Natasha are standing outside, by a busy street. 

"Hey guys, welcome back to the Ironfam!" Peter says excitedly. "So, today is my sixteenth birthday, and first, a lot of you guys have been commenting on my social media, telling me happy birthday and stuff, and I just… thanks, guys! I'm not actually sure how you all knew, but whatever. It's nice!"

{cut}

The video opens to Peter and Tony sitting at the kitchen counter. 

"Hey guys!" Peter exclaims. "Welcome back to the Ironfam! Today, I'm here with Mr. Stark, and we are doing the gross cupcake challenge!"

{cut}

The video opens to Peter and Tony sitting on the couch in the living room. 

"Happy Thanksgiving, Ironfam!" he announces, throwing his arms out in a wide 'ta da' gesture. "Sorry for any of you that aren't in America… but I just had to do a video on Thanksgiving, it's, like, one of my favorite holidays." 

{cut}

The video opens to Peter standing in the living room. It looks like Christmas threw up on Stark Tower; there are decorations everywhere, complete with a massive Christmas tree covered in beautiful ornaments and garnishes, and surrounded by a large pile of presents. 

"Hey guys, welcome back to the Ironfam!" Peter exclaims. "So, this video is coming out a little later for all of you guys, but… it's Christmas Eve! 

{cut}

"Hey guys!" Peter says brightly. "Welcome back to the Ironfam! Today I'm here with Mr. Dad, obviously, for another food challenge, and for once, Clint and Natasha were not in charge of what foods they are!" 

{cut}

"Hey guys, welcome back to the Ironfam!" Peter says brightly. "This is going to be a bit of a shorter video. So, I've been going through the comments you guys leave on these videos, and I've seen a bunch of you asking what we're going to name Baby Stark."

{cut}

"Hey, guys," Tony says, after Peter doesn't say anything. "Welcome back to the Ironfam. Today is the day that Peter gets his wisdom teeth removed. Clearly, he's overjoyed." 

"I don't like needles," Peter says, his voice muffled by Lady's head. "Or surgical procedures of any kind." 

{cut}

"Hey guys, welcome back to the Ironfam!" Peter says brightly. "So, today I'm here with Ned and MJ, and we're going to be getting Sorted into our Hogwarts houses!" 

Tony skids into the room, looking panicked. 

"Stop whatever you're doing!" he shouts, his voice a little crazed. "We've got to get Pepper to the hospital! Now!" 

{cut}

Peter's hands are covering his mouth, and his elbows are resting on his knees. 

"They're bringing her home," he says, sounding disbelieving. "I'm… I'm gonna meet Morgan. My baby sister. She's coming home." 

{cut}

The video opens to Peter and Tony sitting in Peter's room, on his bed. 

"Alright, Peter," Tony says, turning to face Peter. "Do you have any idea why we're filming this video?" 

"No," Peter shakes his head. "You just told me to step away from Morgan for five minutes to come film with you." 

{cut}

"Hey guys, welcome back to the Ironfam!" Peter says brightly. "So, a few weeks ago, Ned, MJ and I were going to get Sorted into our Hogwarts houses for you guys, because that's been a highly requested video, but we were interrupted by Morgan's birth. And, I think it'll be funner now that we've got Mr. Dad and Harley here to do it with us!"

{cut}

The video opens to Tony, sitting on his bed. He's a little too close to the camera, and is speaking very quietly. 

"Okay," he whispers. "So, uh, welcome to the Ironfam, I guess. Today I'm going to be pranking Peter."

{cut}

"Hey guys, welcome back to the Ironfam!" Peter says. "So, I'm guessing you've all seen the title, so you already know what's going down today. I am going to be asking MJ to go to prom with me! So, I'm definitely nervous, but I think she'll say yes? Hopefully? Maybe everything is in my head and she actually hates me, I dunno, that's a possibility-"

{cut}

"Hey guys!" Peter says brightly. "Welcome back to the Ironfam! Today, as you can probably see, I'm here with the one and only MJ!" 

"As you can probably see?" MJ asks, her tone teasing. 

"I mean, I don't want to discriminate against blind people, Michelle."

{cut}

"Hey guys, welcome back to the Ironfam!" Peter says brightly. "Once again, I am here with MJ again."

"You said again twice," MJ interrupts. 

"Shut up," Peter rolls his eyes.

{cut}

"Hey everyone, welcome back to the Ironfam!" Peter says brightly. "I am obviously here with these guys, and today we are filming a very special video!"

"Peter turns seventeen tomorrow," MJ interrupts. "And as you can see, he's very excited about it." 

{cut}

"Hey guys, welcome back to the Ironfam," he says, trying to be enthusiastic, but sounding extremely scared and a little sheepish. "I'm sure you all saw the news today… I wanted to get this out today, so it's going to be unedited, just one thing, and probably not as long as you'd all like it to be, but… here we go." 

{cut}

"Hey guys, welcome back to the Ironfam!" he says cheerfully. "So, obviously last week's video was… not the one I had intended to film, but I don't really want to revisit that conversation, so we're just going to ignore it, okay? Okay." 

{cut}

"Hey guys, welcome back to the Ironfam!" Peter says brightly. "Sorry we didn't post last weekend, we got super busy and just didn't really feel like filming, but we're here this weekend! Today I am here with Ned and MJ, plus Harley and Dad are behind the camera but they're not playing the game. As you probably saw from the title, today we're playing Who Knows Me Better!" 

"Oh, is that what we're doing?" Ned asks, looking at Peter. "I thought we were playing Pictionary."

{cut}

"Hey guys!" Peter says brightly. "Welcome back to the Ironfam! Today, with the usual crew of idiots, and we are playing Last to be Found!"

{cut}

"Hey guys, welcome back to the Ironfam!" he says brightly. "Today I'm here with Harley, and on this day, September 25, Harley has turned 17!"

{cut}

"Hello, Ironfam," he says softly, his voice croaky. He gives a weak, watery smile. "I don't… I don't really want to be filming right now, but I thought you guys should have a right to know what's going on." 

{cut}

"Hey guys, I just wanted to film real quick and say I am SUPER sorry for missing, like, the ENTIRE month of October." he says, very loudly and slightly slurred.  "I am aware that October is Spoopy Season, which is prime YouTube content, but I was really sad because my dog died and I just didn't want to. However, I am BACK, so prepare yourselves for some really ****** content because I have plans and all of them are TRASH." 

{cut}

Peter's face is uncomfortably close to the camera now. 

"Also sorry for being really intense. I am in an unusual mood."

The sound of a door opening can be heard in the background. 

"Peter?" Tony's voice exclaims. "What the **** are you doing-"

{cut}

Tony is now holding the camera. 

"Hello, Ironfam," he says. "Anyone who watches the news knows that Spider-Man was shot last night, and so Peter is currently in the MedBay on a lot of drugs that are strong enough to knock out an elephant. So, he was not supposed to be filming right now, but he found the camera, and decided to anyway."

{cut}

The video opens to Peter sitting in his bedroom. 

"Why hello there, Ironfam," he says. "Today, I have decided to make very stupid decisions; I'm going to prank MJ." 

{cut}

"Well hello there, Ironfam," MJ says conversationally. "First things first. Do not come at my bedroom in the comments. A girls allowed to rebel against societal conventions and still like purple, ok?"

{cut}

"Bonjour, Ironfam," Peter says. "Welcome to a video that we decided to post today. Obviously our schedule has gone to ****. I'm working on it. Until that point, expect random videos posted at random times." 

{cut}

"Hey guys, welcome back to the Ironfam!" Peter says brightly. "As you can see, there are two new faces with us today. So like two months ago, sorry about that, we posted a video of MJ and I pranking our friends, and we received a shit ton of comments asking who the redhead was. So, we made this video specifically to introduce our new friend, explain more about our 'private' lives, and also to be a general Q and A."

{cut}

The video opens to Peter sitting in his room, alone. 

"Hey, guys, welcome back to the Ironfam," he says in a rush. "First off, no, the title's not clickbait. Second, I'm sure you guys want more information." 

{cut}

"Hey, guys, welcome back to the Ironfam," Peter says cheerfully. "So, before I disappeared for two months and then returned to drop the bomb that I'm getting another sibling, MJ and I pranked this lot that we were fighting and breaking up and being all mean to each other." 

{cut}

The team appears to be mingling, with their chatter audible in the background. Peter is filming selfie-style. 

"Hey guys, welcome back to the Ironfam!" he says, a little louder than normal to be heard over everyone else. "Today, as you can obviously see, is the gender reveal of the next Baby Stark!" 

{cut}

"Hey guys, welcome back to the Ironfam!" Peter says brightly. "I realize we only had the gender reveal last week, but we actually already know what we're naming the twins!"

{cut}

The video opens to Harley and Ned sitting in a living room that hasn't been seen before. It's a bit on the small side, but it looks cozy. 

"Hey guys, welcome back to the Ironfam," Harley says. "We're pranking Peter today." 

{cut}

The video opens to Peter, Ned, MJ, Harley, Betty, and Ismay sitting on Peter's bed. 

"Hey guys, welcome back to the Ironfam!" Peter says brightly. "So, today is currently August 3, and my birthday is a week away! Soon, I will officially be an adult." 

{cut}

"Hey guys, welcome back to the Ironfam!" Peter says brightly. "Today, I don't know what video we're filming because Dad won't tell me! Congrats, you know more than I do."

{cut}

"Alright," Peter says. "Sorry for that probably really long montage, but that's what felt right for the final video. Special shoutout to YouTube user DoritoGod who commented some form of #Irondad on every. Single. Video." 

{cut}

"I guess…" Peter hesitates. "I guess it's time to say goodbye." 

{cut}

Tony, Pepper, Steve, Natasha, and Bruce are sitting on the couch in the living room. Bucky, Clint, Wanda, Happy, Sam, and Rhodey are standing behind it. Ned, MJ, Harley, Betty, and Ismay are sitting on the floor in front of it. Peter is standing a bit in front of all of them, filming selfie style. 

"Goodbye Ironfam!" the team choruses. 

"That's it for this video," Peter says, smiling lightly. "Like and subscribe to join the Ironfam, but that's all there is of… this. See you all around." 

Peter's hand comes up and covers the lens. 

{cut}