Bedroom Tour!

The video opens to Peter, standing alone just outside a door. Obviously someone is filming him, but he's the only one in the frame. 

"Hey guys, welcome back to the Ironfam!" he says cheerfully. "So, obviously last week's video was… not the one I had intended to film, but I don't really want to revisit that conversation, so we're just going to ignore it, okay? Okay." 

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"So one video that has been requested weirdly often," Peter continues. "Is a bedroom tour. I dunno why everyone wants to know what my bedroom looks like, that's kind of weird, but whatever. And those requests have only gotten more common since my other identity was revealed. I guess people want to see how a superhero lives? Keep in mind that my room will be massively different from, say, Steve's, or Natasha's. And, of course, you've seen bits and pieces of my room, mostly my bed, but now you're gonna get the whole, unedited tour! I've probably already cut once or twice since I started this video, but I'm gonna just get this tour in one take, because I'm kind of a little late for something already, but this was gonna be my only chance to film for a while, and I wanted to actually get a video out this week, so… here we go!" 

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"So this begins the non-editing," Peter says, stepping forward so he's directly in front of the door. "We'll still bleep out curse words, because I don't want to get in trouble with YouTube, but no editing other than that. Okay? Okay. So… welcome to my bedroom!" 

He pushes the door open and backs into it, his arms held out in a 'ta da!' gesture. 

"So, I've got this nice little room in the corner of the penthouse floor of Stark Tower," Peter explains. "So I've got a balcony over there, which we'll get to in a minute. Now, I am aware my room is a little excessive. That's what happens when your dad is the most extra billionaire in the world. I tried to stop him. Moving on."

He heads over to the back corner, where there is a small raised portion. 

"As you can see," he says as he walks. "Most of my room is wood floor. Over here, on this little platform, we've got carpet, because that's where my bed is." 

Peter jumps up the few steps, and plops onto his bed. 

"This is my bed," he says after a moment. "I've filmed many intros here. You probably recognize this." 

He sits up, and gestures at his nightstand. 

"This is my nightstand. It's black and red, to go with the color scheme of the room. As you can see, the walls are red. The rug under my bed is blue. My bed is red. The curtains are blue. There is some blue furniture. Perhaps my color scheme makes sense now that I've been outed." 

Someone, it sounds like MJ, snorts from behind the camera. Peter gives her a confused look, before rolling his eyes. 

"Oh my god, I did not mean like that," he sighs. "I simply meant that it has been revealed that I may moonlight as a superhero. Stop looking at me like that, Michelle." 

The camera pans to a few display shelves, full of trophies, still on the raised portion. "So what's that over there, Peter?" MJ's voice asks. 

Peter glares at the camera, before waving it off. 

"Those are the shelves that Mr. Dad insisted I get to display any award I ever win ever," he rolls his eyes again. "I told you, he's extra. I would have been perfectly okay with a box in the attic." 

"Well, excuse us for wanting to celebrate your achievements," Harley's voice says. 

The camera turns to show him entering the room. He salutes the camera. 

"Evening, Ironfam," he says, biting into an apple. The camera turns back to Peter, who is once again rolling his eyes. 

"This video is a disaster," he sighs. He jumps down the steps, and flops onto a light blue sofa, which is surrounded by blue cushions on the floor. 

"This is where Ned, MJ, Harley and I hang out," he says, not sitting up. "If you look to the wall, you'll notice a tv. That's where we watch all the movies that Mr. Dad and Mom and the team and everyone don't like." 

Peter sits up, staring into the camera. "Can you believe that none of the adults in this house like Toy Story?" 

"Get over it," Tony's voice yells from somewhere outside the room. 

"Never!" Peter shouts back. 

The camera turns just in time to see Harley kick the door shut. 

"Anyway," Peter says, standing up again. He kicks one of the cushions. "These are here because sometimes we want to lay on the floor but still be comfortable. So I bought a bunch of these little pouffe things. No judging." 

"I don't think anybody's judging you," Harley says from Peter's bed, where he's made himself comfortable. 

"It's the internet," Peter says. "Somebody's always judging you." 

"True," MJ's voice says. She turns the camera to look at a wall, that is obviously concealing part of the room. "So what's over there, Pete?" 

"That is what I call my lair," Peter informs the camera. "Behind that wall is a lot of weird sciency stuff. I can't show it to you, because it's ninety percent confidential and ten percent incomprehensible to anyone except the one who wrote it, but I will tell you that most of you probably wouldn't be interested in it anyway." 

"Fair enough," Harley calls. "There's this giant blackboard over there, it takes up an entire wall, and it's just covered in these completely nonsensical equations and ****. I don't know how he comes up with them, but the weirder part is that Tony just comes in here and understands all of it like it's actually written in English." 

"Don't mind him, he's just stupid," Peter stage whispers to the camera. He then returns to a normal volume. "I actually have two pets that you guys don't know about. Over here, in the tv area, is my beautiful fish. Her name is Sushi and I love her dearly. And over here," Peter crosses the room to what looks like a hamster cage beside a desk. "Is my hedgehog. His name is Quilliam Shakespear and he's an idiot, but I love him anyway."

"Don't even bother asking why it's name is Quilliam," Harley calls. "I still don't understand it." 

"Yeah, because you're an idiot," Peter retorts. "Anyone with even a single brain cell understands the joke and thinks it's funny. Anyway," he turns back to the camera. "Quilliam lives next to my desk, because I spend a lot of my freetime on my desk because it's where my homework and computer is. There's nothing interesting there. Over there," he points across the room. "Are my bookshelves. As you can see, there are two, and they have more books than are necessary on them because I really like to read, even though I almost never have time to. Sometimes I read instead of sleep. You'll notice that there are more of the weird little cushions over there. That's because I love them and I put them in a pile that I lay on when I'm reading at two in the morning."

Peter looks around the room. "I do believe that concludes my bedroom," he says. "I mean, my closet is over there by my bed, but that doesn't matter. Over there, between my books and my desk, is the door to the balcony. There's really nothing out there, except a few plants, but the view is amazing so I'll show you anyway." 

Peter leads MJ and the camera out onto the balcony. The view is, indeed, amazing. You can see the river, and a beautiful skyline. 

"Well, I think I'll end this video out here," Peter shrugs. "Thank you guys for watching, and for your support throughout my involuntary introduction as Spider-Man. I hope you guys enjoyed this video, even though it seems like it would be super boring. Like and subscribe if you'd like to join the Ironfam and see more of… this. See you guys next week! Bye!" 

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