eros_sachet
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eros_sachet5mthReplied to HelenaHomerHereCh 9 Seal part-2- eros_sachet5mthReplied to Ariana_SawyerCh 9 Seal part-2
- eros_sachet5mthReplied to Ariana_SawyerCh 9 Seal part-2
- eros_sachet6mthCommented
thanks for the update
This book has been deleted. - eros_sachet6mthCommented
More
This book has been deleted. - eros_sachet6mthCommented
I actually like these little poems...very cute!
"One day everyone has to die" - eros_sachet6mthCommented
Hear*
This paragraph has been deleted. - eros_sachet1yrPosted
First, like the cover and synopsis, it probably pulls a lot of readers. It's kinda fasted paced with lots of description and I am down for that. The character background is well set up and everything is good. what the author could improve on is.... dialogues, they all sound pretty much the same (until where I read) I am sure it improved on the lateral chapter. other than that loved it, keep writing author! ;p
- eros_sachet1yrCommented
again- its too long man-
I began to run as fast as i could, the large ice was still sliding down and it happened to be coming my way, i wouldn't want to follow another path or i would miss the way to khandland, so i had to keep on running. I ran fast as i could, the avalanche still rolling down the precipice fastly.And by now the floor began to crack all the snow blew up to the air. And the whole place became ice, i wish someone should just save me this instant. The ice also began to crack, it made me loose my balance and i fell, the whole ice parted into two halves. I was happy that it would fall into the river, but instead another ice was falling from ahead, i tried to run fast but the ice was too slippery, i decided to jump over the rock, i wanted to jump and alas the map flew out of my hands, i cursed myself for not putting it inside my satchel earlier.I had to guess the right way now, it was all the avalanche fault, i wonder why all these keep happening, until i saw a crooked tree and went to hide under it, the avalanche rolled away falling off the mountain and breaking down the ground. - eros_sachet1yrCommented
DONT DO THAT TO MY FAV BIRD-
I hated owls, not only because they are nocturnal creatures, but they are one of our enemies, and are always considered evil. - eros_sachet1yrCommented
You are doing great! 💗💗
This paragraph has been deleted. - eros_sachet1yrCommented
Maybe keep the paragraph short, it will be easy to read-
This paragraph has been deleted. - eros_sachet1yrCommentedCh 3 An Intruder
- eros_sachet1yrCommented
FL wants wool- but it's summer season?
I stood up and plucked out one mango from the tree, i had always hated this fruit ever since i was young but right now i have no choice. - eros_sachet1yrCommented
i think you can make the last sentence a bit better 'I just grew up and found that tradition' sounds off.
This paragraph has been deleted. - eros_sachet1yrCommented
A whole paragraph out of a sentence- damn
I was shocked seeing mother and father's lifeless body fall to the ground, blood was oozing out mom's neck, while the sword thrusted out of father's back, i only remembered mom and dad telling me to take Kira and run, but right now i couldn't run, i had millions of thoughts in my head, who were those peoples, yes there were invaders but they looked strange, father had earlier sent his men to war, and most of the enemies were killed, resulting our men to bring the ones alive as slaves, and our kingdom became very popular and the best among all seven kingdoms. - eros_sachet1yrReplied to Tangerqueen
- eros_sachet1yrPosted
Love the writing style! The grammar mistakes were 0, at least I didn't see any errors. 5 chapters were posted in a day that's a damn good start! The story is not fasted paced but not slow as well, just perfect and I am down for it. Love em characters, their priorities could be understood just by reading their dialogues, I LOVE THE FL! This is definitely a book that would live in my library! keep writing author you got yourself a fan!