I’ve read this three times now and I’ve come to the conclusion that the Batman joke while it was funny the first it’s no longer. References are really only funny when it’s subtle or used lightly. If you’re gonna make a fake name using a reference use a different one each time.

Fun fact 99% of people struck by lightning survive so realistically the odds were in his favor but I like how you’ve written the story so far~

You do realize the reason why legendaries are unique is that some of them are busted take mega rayquaza it’s strong enough to challenge primal kyogre who can literally scorch the earth with its mere presence and flood the area if given enough time not discounting that rayquaza’s ability called delta stream which causes extreme wind. That’s busted if there’s more then one cause if you stack enough legendaries in one place the world would end.

Nice start but the name doesn’t really fit into rwby even though it’s a color. It would be better if you picked a color that matched him. His hair is red but you naming him blue lotus doesn’t really make sense. It would be nice to have him in a color scheme that doesn’t clash because blue and red clash against each other so clothing wise it doesn’t make sense also his first and last name clash while no one else’s does. Everyone else sticks to a color scheme then the mc but other than that the story is good.

Who is KDJ?

But weiss’s mother isn’t dead~

I like the story it’s just hard to figure a lot of details cause you’re not describing anything and you keep using * which is kinda annoying

The only problem I have with this fanfic is that instead saying”he says as he goes to use his reiatsu to scan the area or something along the lines you use *uses reiatsu to scan* which is kinda annoying and makes it hard to picture the scene in my head but otherwise it’s fine~

Isn’t this a NF song?

I don’t understand why you’re calling it balmung if it’s the prototype which would have made it the demon sword gram or merodach the original sin

The hunter organization finding him doesn’t make sense considering the only people who knew his name or even knew he existed was the people who are either missing or dead. The story is okay but it needs some refinement

Romance that happens in the beginning of a story where the protagonist travels different worlds makes it hard to do anything cause then you need to figure out excuses or ways for them to travel with the Mc which in my opinion ruins the story a little bit cause then it feels like all the character development for the Mc will stop and it will just be his girls getting more and more development. But otherwise the story is good but the romance could be put on hold for a time where he comes back.

The encounter doesn’t really make sense but whatever it’s your story.

How are we supposed to tell who’s talking if you’re only using the first letter of their name? Many people have the same first letter. There’s only so many letters, so is there only going to be 26 characters?

The way you brought the relationship is a bit strange since that story just started and it’s a bit hard to picture them as a couple due to the fact that there’s no build up. It’s feels a bit forced.

I’ve lost interest the romance is so bland and it’s ruining the story. All it seems to be is you pairing everyone with the MC by using very flimsy reasons of why they like him. I don’t even know why Amaterasu likes him. Soon it’s probably gonna be Rias falling in love with him due to something like he saves her from the fallen Angels or because he gave her pieces.

The harem seems so fake, how can sparda be the childhood friend of Akeno when they only saw each other once? Also if you’re bad at romance just don’t include it cause it’s really bland Ignis I have to be honest. The story is interesting but I’m losing interest fast because of how fake all the girls seem.

The flames Of ryujin are as hot as the sun so why is it so weak?