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LinYang

LinYang

Lv2

lethargy takes the best of me.

2019-04-18 JoinedGlobal
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101
  • LinYang
    LinYang2mth
    Replied to LinYang

    We're all learning! You've already got a great start! Don't stay up too late. And if it helps at all you can always finish a story first before uploading ^.^ Let's work hard together!

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    Of Life and Death, Across the Veil
    Fantasy Romance · Below_the_current
    detail
  • LinYang
    LinYang2mth
    Posted

    Hey there, I am terribly sorry that I never actually realized that we were swapping reviews; I was asking some others for honest reviews and I forgot that I had asked you for a swap, so I'm very sorry for that. Anyways, let's go. I'll give some of my honest thoughts. I'm not very big on paranormal stories, but I'll do my best to be objective. Writing quality overall is quite good. I spotted little to no grammar mistakes, though I am a little confused as to whether or not you are writing this in past or present tense. It is best to choose one and to stick to it, and I believe that most people prefer past tense. Stability of updates...I know that we are all busy people. The quality of a work shouldn't be based on how often an author updates, really. I see that you also have other works, so I'll pass on this one. Your story is developing quite fast. The plot moves along at a nice pace. You only have a few chapters out, so I cannot say much more. But your premise right now calls for intrigue. Again, you only have a few chapters out right now, so I cannot say much for character design. However, you seem to have given very little description or explanation of who each character is. Your style also lacks outside narration. For example, if Rina has been staying there for a couple of days, you could probably sum up from her point of view a couple of the people she's with and what they're like, so that the readers have an image in their heads. Again, you only have a few chapters out, so I cannot say much on your world background. However, I think a little more explanation would be good. Are werewolves a secret in this world or not? Is there anything else different about this world? You can drop in hints and things in between thoughts as well. All in all, you've got a good grasp on writing with room for improvement. I feel that you could use narration a bit more rather than staying in the scene, as that can come a bit tiring to readers. Keep writing author; you will become better than you are now.

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    Of Life and Death, Across the Veil
    Fantasy Romance · Below_the_current
    detail
  • LinYang
    LinYang2mth
    Commented

    WN does these kind of glitches often, so I usually scour through beforehand to look for any punctuation marks turned into strange diamonds.

    ��I'll keep that in mind, sleep well Rina."
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    Of Life and Death, Across the Veil
    Fantasy Romance · Below_the_current
    detail
  • LinYang
    LinYang2mth
    This book has been deleted.
  • LinYang
    LinYang2mth
    Commented

    "His" instead of "He's"

    He's forehead full of wrinkles no doubt.
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    Of Life and Death, Across the Veil
    Fantasy Romance · Below_the_current
    detail
  • LinYang
    LinYang2mth
    Replied to Below_the_current

    (No worries I hate 1st person too tbh. This was just an experiment. Maybe one day I'll come back XD)

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    Abluvion
    Fantasy · LinYang
    detail
  • LinYang
    LinYang2mth
    Replied to Below_the_current

    Thanks for your review, my friend. I appreciate honesty, feedback, and constructive criticism because it helps me know where to improve next time. So thank you for your honesty and insight. Revisions are big weakness of mine. I went over this a couple of times with my sister and we both can agree that the quality dropped halfway through. I am also an impatient person and a tired person, so I have to admit, uploading this so soon was definitely a mistake on my part. But that's on me, not you, and once again, thank you for pointing that out. I will continue writing and keep your points in mind! Thank you for giving mine a try. I really, really, appreciate it.

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    Abluvion
    Fantasy · LinYang
    detail
  • LinYang
    LinYang2mth
    Replied to Hua_Li_An

    Thank you so much for your review! Yeah, I found that I did kind of rush the ending too much myself, but at the time I was very tired and wanted to be done with this. Maybe I'll pick it up again one day and rewrite it. I can definitely see what you mean. Thanks again for reviewing. :)

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    Abluvion
    Fantasy · LinYang
    detail
  • LinYang
    LinYang2mth
    Replied to AxlSLL

    Thanks for your review! I'll be sure to work on the points you mentioned. :)

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    Yanhua
    Magical Realism · LinYang
    detail
  • LinYang
    LinYang2mth
    Posted

    So far pretty good. Didn't see many grammatical mistakes; book is written in a unique style as well. I like how relatable the main character, though. Do be careful about using emojis though, dear author; they could get you blacklisted. Keep on writing!

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    The Queer Emperor's Wife Is A Little Too Daring!
    Fantasy Romance · _AiRen_
    detail
  • LinYang
    LinYang2mth
    Posted

    So far so good. Writing quality could use a little improvement, but there are no grammatical errors as far as can see. Rose and Erik make a cute couple. I like how fast the plot is moving. Good going author; keep writing.

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    Survive among the Vikings
    Historical Romance · TheElisse
    detail
  • LinYang
    LinYang2mth
    Replied to ThePotatoKing

    Thank you for reading! Yeah, I haven't really found a better platform yet, but in the future I hope to serialize much longer ones more similar to what they have here.

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    Abluvion
    Fantasy · LinYang
    detail
  • LinYang
    LinYang2mth
    Posted

    Only two chapters out right now so I really can't say much. Writing quality is okay, with minimal mistakes. The characters seem interesting, as well as the plot. Recommend for those who like werewolf stories. Keep writing author!

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    Son's of pride
    Fantasy · Dare43564
    detail
  • LinYang
    LinYang2mth
    Posted

    This is really quite well written, though author, be careful of your punctuation. The beginning reminded me of Memento, and was quite haunting. The plot is moving along, and I am interested in seeing where the characters are going. You write very well, author. Keep going!

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    The League of Nightmares
    Horror&Thriller · ThePotatoKing
    detail
  • LinYang
    LinYang2mth
    Replied to s8a4o10101

    Thank you so much for reading! I'm really glad you enjoyed it :)

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    Yanhua
    Magical Realism · LinYang
    detail
  • LinYang
    LinYang2mth
    Commented

    Discord hath sent me.

    Ch 4 This Fourth Miss Will Not, Can Not, Must Not.
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    Power Up, Artist Yang!
    Historical Romance · yaoyueyi
    detail
  • LinYang
    LinYang2mth
    Posted

    Good start. Quite heart-wrenching when Jaden... Anyways. I like seeing the friendships between your MC and her friends. A couple of notes, though: -Careful of punctuation, especially at the end of dialogue, though I noticed that you have gotten better at it as the story went on. -Choose a tense between present and past, otherwise it is a little jolting to read. -Careful also of using Korean characters. I believe that they have gotten your novel blacklisted. If you want your novel to be whitelisted again so people can vote and it appears on your profile, shoot the Webnovel team an email. Overall, it's getting quite good. Keep writing every day, author!

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    Stay'
    Contemporary Romance · Dara_Manuel
    detail
  • LinYang
    LinYang2mth
    Replied to Nicolas_Cavalieri

    No worries! Take your time!

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    Tropical Rush!
    Contemporary Romance · Nicolas_Cavalieri
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  • LinYang
    LinYang2mth
    Posted

    So far, pretty good. Quality is decent, though it could use with a quick edit. Very fact-paced, and makes the readers want to know what happens next. Keep writing author!

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    DO YOU TRUST ME?
    Realistic Fiction · Elijah_weiss
    detail
  • LinYang
    LinYang2mth
    Posted

    I like the ending that you wrote to this book very much. Pretty good for an October read. Quality was okay, and can be cleaned up with an edit. Plot was easy to understand, and characters were endearing. Good job author!

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    E.B
    Fantasy Romance · YIANUWANGXIAO
    detail