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yokedjaguar

yokedjaguar

Lv4

Im more ordinary than ordinary characters in novels.

2018-07-12 JoinedUnited States
-d

Writing

469.6h

of reading

644

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Badges7

Moments

64
  • yokedjaguar
    yokedjaguar18h
    Posted

    The story itself is actually really good, my problem is the grammar, all you have to do is proofread and it would be fine. . .

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    Game Of Thrones: Baratheon The Schemer
    TV · GNaNA
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  • yokedjaguar
    yokedjaguar5d
    Posted

    Good book, grammars clean, the characters are done well, each chapter is a good length. My only problem is the predictability of it and sometimes the characters do something out of character and it feels awkward.

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    The Wizard called Oz - HP
    Movies · BoiGeorge
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  • yokedjaguar
    yokedjaguar16d
    Posted

    God you can't write a single sentence right. Are you using a translator or is this you cause my God is it bad, the character isn't that compelling either he's more annoying than anything. Thanks for ruining another omnitrix story for me, it seems that no one can actually make a decent one except a handful of people.

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    MHA:OMNITRIX
    Anime & Comics · Boboiboyfan01
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  • yokedjaguar
    yokedjaguar16d
    Commented

    I'm actually kinda happy this ff was made into a reading ff, thanks author

    Ch 1 Chapter 1
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    Reading : A Father's Love
    Book&Literature · David_Anthony
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  • yokedjaguar
    yokedjaguar17d
    Commented

    Author do you know anything about the marvel universe or did you just learn everything from fanfics and maybe the movies.

    Ch 1 Getting Reincarnated
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    A godly Reincarnation:Marvel(Completed)
    Movies · baedog_73
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  • yokedjaguar
    yokedjaguar28d
    Posted

    Good book but 15k word requirement is annoying, usually I'd give you a 1 star but that was actually better than I thought it was going to be, please don't ruin it.

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    My new relaxing life( Sort Of )
    Anime & Comics · Heyimmr_69
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  • yokedjaguar
    yokedjaguar1mth
    Posted

    Good translation, good story, only problem is its gets a little slow sometimes but it's also realistic in the fact that he's not doing 100 movies at once and he's making a billion dollars a day, my explanation might be a bit of an overexageration but I've seen numerous showbiz novels kinda snowball into that. Translator you should try to get in contact with the author maybe turn this into an extra bit of cash so you can possibly do more of their works without losing the will to do it endless of course this is purely just a hobby. You said the author has more showbiz novels so maybe you can do his other novels after this is completed or you catch up to his new releases, we just don't have enough quality showbiz novels. Either way quality work 10 outta 10, good on both of you. Good luck in your endeavors.

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    The Legendary Actor
    Realistic Fiction · Shallowman
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  • yokedjaguar
    yokedjaguar1mth
    Posted

    It's definitely one of the best naruto fanfics I've read in the past 6 months, theirs not really anything I can say bad about this and don't listen to commentators endless they actually say something helpful not because they want something. Besides their not gonna stop so I hope your not gonna drop.

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    Shinobi Prince (Naruto FanFic)
    Anime & Comics · RC_Soft
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  • yokedjaguar
    yokedjaguar1mth
    Commented

    how do you call someone a guy numerous times and then change them to a female and vise versa

    Ch 2 She is my neighbor??
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    Harem king System
    Anime & Comics · Joey_Tribbiani
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  • yokedjaguar
    yokedjaguar1mth
    Posted

    . . . .

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    My Amazing Wechat/ Red Packet Server
    Magical Realism · sani117
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  • yokedjaguar
    yokedjaguar1mth
    Posted

    I can't find anything original about it so I'm out, plus its annoying seeing you talk in past tense so much,not to mention the dozen other word placements that could've been fixed if you went back and proofread.

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    Harry Potter : A different tale
    Book&Literature · LazyMonk
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  • yokedjaguar
    yokedjaguar1mth
    Commented

    Did you forget, nerf, or just make the mc forget his talent that can control his emotions

    Ch 5 Royal Procession
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    Avatar the Last Airbender: Fire Nations Holy Sun
    others · ZaneLost
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  • yokedjaguar
    yokedjaguar1mth
    Commented

    this is boring nothing but fillers and info dumps

    Ch 5 Chapter 5 - It's Dangerous!!!
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    The Third Party
    Fantasy · SmileSBeMr137
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  • yokedjaguar
    yokedjaguar1mth
    Posted

    My only problem is the parents, I get they said he had to train himself but to completely disappear feels a little weird and I wish he could have more transformations but its understandable to have it fixed to 6 so it's not that big of a deal, besides that everything else is really good. Good luck and hope you don't drop.

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    In MHA with a Pokemon quirk
    Anime & Comics · Ivan_The_Terrible
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  • yokedjaguar
    yokedjaguar1mth
    Commented

    Mc's a retard. Simple.

    Ch 1 1) Time.
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    Immortal Warlock In Teen Wolf
    TV · KillingSoftly
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  • yokedjaguar
    yokedjaguar1mth
    Posted

    It's slow, the story itself is boring, mc has 70 yrs of experience and yet he's a retard, grammar is annoying, comedic side of the story feels more annoying than funny after awhile, systems stupid, it has potential but that's the only good thing about it.

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    The Last Chance I Could Live!
    Fantasy · amarieheath
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  • yokedjaguar
    yokedjaguar1mth
    Commented

    Dumbest ****n thing I've ever ****n read.

    Ch 14 Chapter-13 Death of the King of the Ice Giants!
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    Merrick: God of Void and Infinity
    Movies · Archdukesol
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  • yokedjaguar
    yokedjaguar1mth
    Commented

    Be careful about going into past tense when it's not needed.

    Ch 1 Chapter-1 : A New Day
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    Hollywood ShowBiz Lord
    Magical Realism · AN_13
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  • yokedjaguar
    yokedjaguar1mth
    Commented

    You need to work on your conversations, their awkward and a little forced.

    Ch 6 Training and Joining Army
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    Now, where am I?
    Realistic Fiction · wheretonow
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  • yokedjaguar
    yokedjaguar1mth
    Commented

    Gotta love it when the author adds something about intelligence while also messing up their grammar in the same sentence.

    Ch 2 The true reality
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    Revenge is always sweet
    Anime & Comics · Tento
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