Lennox Jones is an average sixteen-year-old black girl trying to make sense of the world. At the start of her junior year, not only does she get her heartbroken, but her family moves into a new apartment after her mother remarries.

She struggles to keep her anxiety in check as she assimilates to her new circumstances. When Lennox begins to see a social worker at school, she gets the idea to start an advice column to help other struggling students. 

Follow along as Lennox embarks on a journey of self-discovery and acceptance, all the while being the anonymous friend everyone needs.

''Sometimes I sit alone in my room, not because I'm lonely but because I want to. I quite like it but too bad sitting by myself always leads to terrifying, self-destructive thoughts. When I'm about to do something, he calls. He is like my own personal superhero and he doesn't even know it. Now my superhero never calls and there is no one to help me, maybe I should get a new hero. What do you think?'' 

''Why don't you be your own hero?''  

 I didn't want to be my own hero I just wanted my best friend, too bad that's all he'll ever be to me- a friend. 

Trigger Warning so read at your own risk.

''Sometimes I sit alone in my room, not because I'm lonely but because I want to. I like it but too bad sitting by myself always leads to terrifying, self-destructive thoughts. When I'm about to do something, he calls. He is like my own personal superhero and he doesn't even know it. Now my superhero never calls and there is no one to help me, maybe I should get a new hero. What do you think?'' 

''Why don't you be your own hero?''  

 I didn't want to be my own hero I just wanted my best friend, too bad that's all he'll ever be to me- a friend. 

Trigger Warning so read at your own risk.  

The book isn't paused I just discontinued it on this website. reading.https://www.goodnovel.com/book_info/21000016718/Romance/My-Best-Friend -if you want to find out about her best friend

Remy Tsai was once happy. She had her boyfriend, Jack, and her best friend, Elise. 
But know jack is dead, shot through the chest-
And it was Elise who pulled the trigger. Was it self defence? Or was it something deeper?
Find out what will happen in the book...

He takes. 

She surrenders.

But not anymore. 

Seen as nothing but a bitch, Trix Williams is tired of playing her part in the messed up hierarchy that she created so long ago. With the help of her best friend and an unlikely ally she embarks on a journey of self discovery.

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Forget About Setting Goals. Focus on This Instead: For most of us, the path to self-improvement starts by setting a specific and actionable goal. What I'm starting to realize, however, is that when it comes to actually getting things done and making progress in the areas that are important to you, there is a much better way to do things. It all comes down to the difference between goals and systems.
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  "Life is a process of becoming, a combination of states we have to go through. Where people fail is that they wish to elect a state and remain in it. This is a type of death." – Anais Nin
Our Self Help, Self Improvement, and Inspirational Articles include a variety of authors who'd love to help you get the most out of life and the most out of yourself.
Self Help Articles by Joi Sigers, Self Help Daily
"Different Paths in the Self Help Industry"
The Self Help industry has reached such monstrous proportions that it's a wonder the world can even contain it. The public is ravenous for information, so book publishers turn the books out by the thousands. Personally, I think this says a lot of positive things about our society… (Continue reading Different Paths in the Self Help Industry)
"How to Blow the Blues Away"
Around this time of year, you can find endless charts and articles comparing colds and flu. Is it a cold or is it the Flu? The symptoms of each are then compared, with the hope that the reader will pinpoint what's making them sick, then be able to brag to their family that they either have the "worst cold ever" or the "most severe flu known to man…"  (Continue reading How to Blow the Blues Away)
"Reasons are the Building Blocks to a Better Life"
They say that if you have enough reasons you can do anything. So, unless I miss my guess, if we want to build a better life for ourselves, that makes REASONS the building blocks we'll need for our project. Even those of us without any architectural expertise know there's no such thing as building from the top/down, we have to start at the bottom with our blocks. More to the point – with our reasons…  (Continue reading this Reasons are the Building Blocks to a Better Life)


Marguerite is oblivious as she folds Arthmael's body into beautiful silhouettes. Following the familiar choreography, she dances relentlessly.

Grand Jete! Penche! followed by a series of graceful pas de chats. All concatenated in front of the enthralled emperor.

When the music reaches the outro in a full stop, Marguerite falls gracefully on the floor in a pose. She stays there and waits for the king to tell her she can leave.

She stays on the ground for a long time but hears nothing from him. Wondering if she did anything wrong, she wants to lift her head to look at the king's face, but quickly remembers the warning he gave her. If she disrespects him any further, who knows what he might do to her.

She suddenly feels her chin being lifted, her eyes meet the hazels of Demian. She forgets to breathe and falls from her pose onto the floor. She doesn't have time to regain her senses before two strong arms lift her off the floor.

She is about to question him on his weird behaviour when her mouth is suddenly covered by his in a kiss.

-------------------------------------------------
Marguerite is very talented. She has a beautiful voice, a great passion for music and various talents in the arts. Unfortunately, her bright future gets compromised when she is forced to leave her world to fulfill the wish of someone else. Marguerite wanting to go home as soon as possible, accepts. However things turn out quite unexpected for her.

The cover belongs to the rightful owner. If you are the owner of the art and want me to take it down, DM me on discord burlesque_dancer#2837

David arrives in his room saying he has to get ready for school and learn some dumb shit that won't even help out in real life scenario but he can't help go back to the dream conversation he had with X/xon about how serious his plan are but they still don't know anything that could help them out to stop the machine for good they are still in the dark until the meeting start and that's next next week a whole week talking about what to do the next five year's in secret to ensure safety in the world and order as we'll david say once the job starts he will tell them all the information he knows so far and what to expect from this mission david fall's deep asleep as this happen rynx is seen walking towards the cabin hidden in the forest making sure he doesn't get caught off guard this time as he sneaks around he see a bunch of people sleeping inside the cabin he see a familiar face of the same men who lock him up in the chest underneath the basement he won't let that happen again rynx looks around trying to figure out a plan to get this bunch of human's to leave and get far away from here soon before he meets his younger self he finds a huge wasp hive on top of the trees grabbing it sneakily.

     He throws the whole hive into the cabin without getting noticed breaking the hive in half the wasps get angry and furious looking around to see who may have broken the hive to see a bunch of human's sleeping they all get there stinger ready stabbing some of the men to death for breaking there home as the humans start to wake up one by one screaming in pain the group leader look around only seeing angry wasp stabbing the men around them waking up the rest telling them to get up and get there stuff and run outside now or they will get poison as rynx plan is foolproof all the human leave the area only leaving him left alone making rynx happy he wait insided the cabin making sure he catches his young self coming in and stop him from getting stuck inside the chest and show him a good future where he has a best friend and a new family to feal at home after many hour's passes by he hears some tree branches break in half catching the full attention of rynx who looks thru the window making sure it's the right target and see that it is himself sneaking around without a care in the world as he finds a way to enter the cabin he makes sure that the cabin is empty using his good hearing.

     To search all over the cabin rynx knows how to not show up in his ear range as young rynx finishes hearing around he relaxes a bit saying he is so tire he can just pass out right now without a care in the world rynx ask his younger self was he that lazy back then in his prime year's young rynx gets up quick looking around asking who is he and what is he doing here this is his house he shouldn't mess with him he's the pet of one of the seven emperor's she would kill him and his family if he doesn't show himself and surrender rynx appear in front of him with a disappointed look on his face telling his younger self to relax he is a friend he doesn't mean harm too him young rynx look at rynx saying they kind of look alike rynx say of course they look alike he's him from the future young rynx gasp in surprise saying he looks so old for him to have aged that much rynx say we'll this happen when ur locked insided a chest for 20 or maybe more year's he doesn't remembered young rynx ask what is he doing here if he's from the future rynx tell his younger counter self that he's here to fix a mistake from ever happening.

     Like him getting stuck in the best for a long time young rynx ask does he still work with emperess scarlet in the future when he escape rynx put a hand on his shoulder saying no he found something way better a new set of friend's that he would like for him to meet they are trustworthy and honorable than there emperess crew member's who hate him for being her favorite so they try many ways to finish him off but he's is always saved by scarlet most trusted right hand man the white butler rynx remembers the white butler saying he was so nice compared to the whole crew member's he was scarlet favorite person next to him he treated her like they we're a real family young rynx ask does he have to go join the new crew of friend's that he met rynx say yeah he made at promise to his best friend so he doesn't want him to be sad so he ask his younger self to stay by his best friend side they been thru alot young rynx ask if he fix the little mistake yet or was he waiting on him to arrive here rynx says that there's a old chest on the cabin basement that seal him for many year's so he has to find a way to destroy it so his younger self won't fall for the trap and be stuck missing out his young year's.

     Young rynx ask why not take it back with scarlet she is a powerful witch who has knowledge in her belt and many spells dealing with good and dark magic rynx says he will think about opening the door to the basement showing his young self the chest in the middle of the floor looking normal as hell he goes outside saying maybe they can blow the whole thing up and see if it works if not then he will go with his younger self plan and go call on the there emperess scarlet young rynx see that his older self is turning on the stove and furnaces and other gas appliances around the house he and rynx what he plan on doing he tell his younger self that he's gonna blow the whole house up and see that work if not then he go with him to meet there emperess but he will have to return in a couple month in his place young rynx ask why he still likes living with his friend's rynx open his hand putting his palm on top of his younger self head showing him all his memories after he escape the chest after many year's as the memories begin to appear before his younger self thought he goes thru so much emotions living the life of his older self like he was there playing as him.

The story follows david aztlan who is trying to go on many amazing adventure with a growing crew but on the way he will have to fight many monster, aliens, and god's to protect his home planet and the people

Lina wasn't too confident about succeeding, but she knew that she wouldn't find an alternative method to quickly increase her strength.
"I will do it."
Rather than continuing to feel powerless, she felt that trusting Liye regarding those on her faction being willing to aid her was a far better option.
"Understood."
Liye was already expecting that answer, so he was ready.
"Concentrate and try to feel the voices. This is all I can do to help you. Whatever happens afterward depends on you."
Liye could allow her to connect with the will of the deceased, but that was all. He had no control over whatever would happen once Lina contacted the will.
"I know. Thank you."
Lina knew that she couldn't ask for more help. It was already good enough that she got that chance due to Liye's help.
She focused her concentration on doing what Liye said, and she started to hear those voices in no time.
With Liye acting as the middle man, it was easy to hear the voices. The most critical part was after that.
"I need your help. I need to be strong enough to kill our enemies. I know I am not worthy of your help, but I want the strength to fight."
Lina couldn't avoid depreciating herself because that was what she truly felt.
"You are always worthy of my help. My biggest regret was not being able to help you more."
Lina wasn't sure of who said that voice. She couldn't remember who it was, but she couldn't avoid starting crying.
It was a nostalgic voice. One she heard when she was very young but hadn't been able to hear afterward.
The reason was simple, the owner of that voice died.
At that moment, Lina understood what Liye meant with the voices not being only of those that died recently.
"Mother..."
She couldn't remember properly, but she was already certain that the voice could only belong to her mother.
She died fighting together with her husband and Liye's parents when Liye was still inside his mother's womb, so she was one of the victims of the invaders. It was obvious that she would be there, but it had been such a long time that Lina couldn't even think of that possibility.
"We will all help you. You don't need to continue struggling alone."
That had been her biggest regret. She didn't regret risking her life when she died, but she regretted leaving her daughter alone. Although Ravier didn't die in that battle, she knew that Lina would still miss her too much, given how young she was at that time.
The remaining wills of others in her faction weren't so strong, but they followed the orders of Lina's mother.
The only one Lina noticed that was missing was her father's will.
In the same way that Lina was ashamed to meet Shiba after Eini died, Ravier's remaining will didn't dare to face Lina. He regretted abandoning her due to his choice of self-destruction after Eini died, but he already entrusted her to his best friend.
Part of the will of the universe started to merge with Lina's soul.
Lina wasn't able to remain conscious, but Liye was taking care of her body, so she knew that she wouldn't be in danger. She didn't notice that she would have never considered herself safe if the same situation happened with another man that wasn't of her family.
When she regained her consciousness, she noticed that she had been crying. She didn't know what happened when she was speaking with the will of the universe, but it seemed that her body was unable to contain her tears due to hearing her mother's voice.
"Are you fine? I was worried about you due to how much you have been crying. If it wasn't because I noticed that you succeeded, I would have thought that something bad happened."
Only after Liye spoke did Lina realize that he was hugging her. She could guess that he did it after she started to cry, so she couldn't blame him at all. In fact, she didn't even feel uncomfortable.
"Sorry. I heard my mother's voice, and my body went out of control. Thank you for comforting me."
Only at that moment did she feel like her true self of years ago instead of the heartless person she became afterward due to her experiences.
"Don't worry. I won't tell anyone."
Liye felt that it would be bad for Lina's reputation if others were to learn about that. Lina might say that she didn't care for her reputation, but that was regarding being heartless. She definitely didn't want others to think she was a crybaby.
Liye felt that anyone would have cried in that situation, but the opinions of others were usually devoid of any empathy when it came to mock someone.
"Thank you."
Lina was feeling that she was thanking Liye too much, but she didn't know what else she could do.
After speaking, she noticed that she was still in the same position as before. She had been so comfortable that she forgot to move.
"Liye, is it wrong if I consider you my best friend? I know I don't see you as my brother like it happens with Shiba, and we aren't family either, but you don't feel like a stranger. I never had a best friend before, but I feel that I am comfortable with you because I am considering you my best friend due to the relationship of our parents."
She couldn't find any other explanation. Due to how she lived, she couldn't say she had any close friends.
"You are always worthy of my help. My biggest regret was not being able to help you more."
Lina wasn't sure of who said that voice. She couldn't remember who it was, but she couldn't avoid starting crying.
It was a nostalgic voice. One she heard when she was very young but hadn't been able to hear afterward.
The reason was simple, the owner of that voice died.
At that moment, Lina understood what Liye meant with the voices not being only of those that died recently.
"Mother..."
She couldn't remember properly, but she was already certain that the voice could only belong to her mother.
She died fighting together with her husband and Liye's parents when Liye was still inside his mother's womb, so she was one of the victims of the invaders. It was obvious that she would be there, but it had been such a long time that Lina couldn't even think of that possibility.
"We will all help you. You don't need to continue struggling alone."
That had been her biggest regret. She didn't regret risking her life when she died, but she regretted leaving her daughter alone. Although Ravier didn't die in that battle, she knew that Lina would still miss her too much, given how young she was at that time.
The remaining wills of others in her faction weren't so strong, but they followed the orders of Lina's mother.
The only one Lina noticed that was missing was her father's will.
In the same way that Lina was ashamed to meet Shiba after Eini died, Ravier's remaining will didn't dare to face Lina. He regretted abandoning her due to his choice of self-destruction after Eini died, but he already entrusted her to his best friend.
Part of the will of the universe started to merge with Lina's soul.
Lina wasn't able to remain conscious, but Liye was taking care of her body, so she knew that she wouldn't be in danger. She didn't notice that she would have never considered herself safe if the same situation happened with another man that wasn't of her family.
When she regained her consciousness, she noticed that she had been crying. She didn't know what happened when she was speaking with the will of the universe, but it seemed that her body was unable to contain her tears due to hearing her mother's voice.
"Are you fine? I was worried about you due to how much you have been crying. If it wasn't because I noticed that you succeeded, I would have thought that something bad happened."
Only after Liye spoke did Lina realize that he was hugging her. She could guess that he did it after she started to cry, so she couldn't blame him at all. In fact, she didn't even feel uncomfortable.
"Sorry. I heard my mother's voice, and my body went out of control. Thank you for comforting me."
Only at that moment did she feel like her true self of years ago instead of the heartless person she became afterward due to her experiences.
"Don't worry. I won't tell anyone."
Liye felt that it would be bad for Lina's reputation if others were to learn about that. Lina might say that she didn't care for her reputation, but that was regarding being heartless. She definitely didn't want others to think she was a crybaby.
Liye felt that anyone would have cried in that situation, but the opinions of others were usually devoid of any empathy when it came to mock someone.
"Thank you."
Lina was feeling that she was thanking Liye too much, but she didn't know what else she could do.

When the famous Master Liye is about to reincarnate, he meets a badly wounded former slave on the brink of death and offers him his legacy and a name.
That legacy changes the fate of the former slave, opening a way for him to take revenge on his former owners, but revenge isn’t the only thing on his mind.
He wishes to increase his power so that he can help Master Liye the day he returns to thank him for everything.
This story follows the adventures of Master Liye’s legacy disciple, Shiba.
______________________________________________

This novel is a prequel of Last Wish System occurring approximately 32 thousand years before Last Wish System, but both can be read independently. However, it is more enjoyable reading both because several characters from both novels also appear in the other.

Discord Server: https://discord.gg/RHVESef

More often than not, the world is a more dangerous place for women as
compared to men. Women are usually the target of assaults such as car-nap,
****, holdup, domestic violence, and other crimes. If you ever find yourself
assaulted and forced to defend yourself from your attacker, there would be some
consequences. For instance, you may not be able to take hold of a weapon such
as a taser, mace, or stun gun at the time of attack unless you are ready or have
already anticipated the attack.
Most assaults happen in split seconds and although the most common reaction
of people when confronted with danger is to run, it could not always be the best
solution especially if you have nowhere to run to or call for help. In fact, running
might only lead to more aggression from the attacker. Thus, it is important that
women learn how to defend themselves using self-defense techniques and
weapons. Apart from this, women should also learn how to have the right attitude
in times of danger.
Part of defending oneself from an attacker is discerning when to stay in place
and convince the attacker to set you free and knowing when you should run.
This is where self-defense techniques might apply. Your body is a potential
weapon which you can use against any attacker.
1. Elbow Jab – Many women are not aware that their elbows could be their
best friend during assaults or attacks. This is because elbows are sharp and can
cause damage or pain when striking an attacker. On the other hand, women
have to learn how to throw their weight to execute an elbow jab. This move is
simple since you only have to twist your waist and use your lower and upper half
to maximize the power of your elbow swing. It is best to aim for the attacker's
nose, groin, ribs, throat, or diaphragm to incapacitate him/her temporarily. This
way, you have a chance to get away from the attacker.
2. Hand Defense Moves – Hands may provide comfort and affection but they
can also be of great use for different defense moves other than punching. Since
most women do not have sufficient upper body strength as compared to men,
punching is not a good idea for defense. It is easier and better to use your hands.
You can use your hands for clawing or poking the eyes of the attacker. Hands
are also best to use for twisting, tearing, or pinching the sensitive areas of the
attacker. If the attacker is a man and you opt to use your hands to defend
yourself, it is advisable to aim for the inner thigh area that is near the groin. 
You can also aim for the attacker's upper inside of the arm, and other groin
areas. These are the areas that are most vulnerable to damage or pain.
3. Head Butt – It is a fact that heads are hard because of the thickness of the
skull. As such, they can cause great damage or pain to the attacker. You could
use your head to head-butt your attacker or break his tooth or bone. You can
easily execute a head butt regardless if you are attacked from the front or
behind. Although head butting can also hurt you, it can cause more severe
damage to your attacker. A head butt to the nose bridge is especially painful.
4. Knees Defense Move – Most women are shorter than men. Thus, women
can easily use their knees to aim for the groin area of a male attacker. The
kneecap is strong and can cause a male to temporarily become defenseless
especially if hit in the groin area.
5. Teeth Attack – If there is no other way to defend or protect yourself from
your attacker, you can opt to bring pain upon him/her using your teeth. Although
it may cause a broken or chipped tooth, you still have a chance to get away from
your attacker by biting him.
6. Feet Defense Move – One of the most effective body parts that you can
use for self-defense is your feet. The ball of a foot is perfect for stepping or
stomping on the instep of your attacker. The ball of your foot can also cause pain
to the Achilles tendon, calf area, or ankle of your attacker.
It is always best to discern or assess your assault situation so that you can easily
execute the perfect self-defense move suited for such a situation. Following the
instincts of your body would ensure your safety when defending yourself from an
attacker.
Weapons For Self Defense
In general, women can think of different assault scenarios to prepare in the event
that they encounter such situations. It may be common to hear or see assaults
such as theft, holdup, or even **** in the movies. However, women should come
up with something to defend them from different kinds of assaults. Although selfdefense techniques can very well help women in protecting themselves from
attackers, it is also advisable to carry defense weapons at all times.
1. Pepper Spray – One of the most popular self-defense weapons that
women carry with them is pepper spray. Pepper spray contains Oleoresin
Capsicum, a lachrymatory agent. Pepper spray can cause temporary pain,
blindness, runny nose, throat irritation, uncontrollable coughing, and burning
sensations to an attacker. Although the effects are temporary, pepper spray
allows you to get away from your attacker within 30 to 45 minutes. Pepper spray
is available in different variants. The product can depend on the size of the
pressurized canister which contains the Oleoresin Capsicum. In addition, pepper
spray products differ in the foot range that you may be able to hit an attacker.
Most pepper spray products can hit a person within 4 to 15 feet.
Its size is almost the same as the size of a felt-tip maker. It is usually 1.5 cm in
diameter and 5.5 inches long. A Kubotan is designed for attachment to a key
chain thus it may appear harmless to the attacker especially if he/she is not
familiar with the weapon.
Women can grasp the Kubotan in the fist to execute a "hammer fist" move. It can
also be used to aim for the pressure points of the attacker. A Kubotan adds
strength to a woman's punches when it is grasped behind the fingers. Some
Kubotans have side grips, which are protruded between the fingers. This can
leave your attacker defenseless.
3. Stun Gun – another prominent self-defense weapon carried by most
women is a stun gun. A stun gun is a device which emits electrical charge. This
electrical charge can immobilize or disable an attacker. Tasers are the most
common type and brand of stun guns. On the other hand, stun guns are available
in different types including Phase Induction, T-Wave, and Static Charge.

A friend. Her first true friend.

Someone who understood anxiety attacks, someone who was as much of a social outcast as her. Emma was exactly that person.

"I helped Emma with her work today." Bailey said, taking a bite out of her sandwich

Mom stopped stirring the supper and looked at Bailey. Bailey could smell that it was one of her least favourite meals, and she turned her nose up in distaste.

"You did, huh, so are you guys are friends now?"

"Is Emma your best friend?" William asked, looking up from the colouring picture that he was doing.

William and Bailey were sitting at the kitchen table doing their homework whilst Mom was cooking supper. It was already 5pm, and Dad was due home within a few minutes.

"I don't really call it best friend," Bailey replied, "the term best friend is so over used, I prefer bosom friend or close friend. I also don't know her well enough yet to call her an equivalent of best friend."

But that was not entirely true, Bailey did consider Emma to be a close friend. They seemed like a perfect fit for one another. This was already possibly the closest that she had ever been with someone her age.

It was difficult for Bailey to associate with her peers because she always felt so different to them. Part of the problem was that she knew that she was far more mature than most of them, and that made it very difficult for her to see the point in their social media and dating obsessions.

"What work did you help her with?"

"Just her maths. She forgot her homework at home, so I helped her redo it. She had a panic attack about it. I found her running through the passages hyperventilating and losing her mind, but I managed to calm her down and then we thought of a solution together."

"That is a really stupid thing to panic about. Could she not think to do it in break herself? Why did she need your help to think of such a stupid thing?"

"No, it is not a stupid thing to panic about! Panic does that to you, it makes you unable to see the rational side of things. Sometimes you even lose the ability to do simple things that you can usually do quite easily."

"Watch your tone, Bailey!" Mom scolded, "I am very glad that you do not have stupid panic attacks like that though."

Bailey looked back down at her maths work. Mom did not know. Mom did not understand. She never did. People who did not have anxiety never understood how it felt, and it was upsetting.

Mom did not know how bad Bailey's anxiety got, how much she struggled with that. Only Bailey's psychologist knew about it, and the people who had seen her having a panic attack. She dreaded coming home from school one day and Mom telling her that she had received an email from the school about Bailey's anxiety.

It had happened in her last school, and Bailey hoped that it would never happen again. It had been awful.

You would think that a mother of two children with severe generalised anxiety disorder would at least have a little bit of understanding or compassion towards people with anxiety, even if she did not understand it fully, but Mom was the most unsympathetic person towards people who had panic attacks.

Just the other day, Bailey had heard Mom scolding William for panicking about not being able to find his favourite toy. It was so stupid, not the reason for the panic attack, but Mom's unsympathetic reaction.

Did she not understand anxiety at all, and Bailey doubted even more that she would understand her depression.

Mom was the kind of person who could not differentiate between self-harm and suicide, although to be honest, many people could not.

Just because someone self-harmed, did not mean that they were suicidal. Cutting did not mean that you wanted to die, it was just an escape from reality, a way to let out the pain in an easy and simple way.

It had been three months ago, when Bailey had cut herself for the first time. Although nobody would suspect it because Bailey hid it incredibly well, Bailey suffered with dreadful depression that plagued her mostly at night.

Before her little run in with self-harm, Bailey had not understood why people cut themselves. She had not understood how much it helped, and what a quick or simple fix it was to the ghastly pain that depression brought to her life. However, she had also not realised how much regret and guilt she would feel in the morning when she caught a glimpse of the vibrant, red stain on her snow-white duvet.

She could explain that away easily enough, but the guilt would not leave quite as easily. She felt as though she had failed, lost the battle with darkness and depression, given in to the temptation, but she had not and still did not wish to die.

She had not cut herself because of a desire to leave this world, but rather as a distraction from the pain that she felt, the pain that haunted her every night, the pain that nobody knew about. She had just felt so alone in that deep, dark hole that depression had thrown her into, and had wanted an escape, even if it was only for a moment.

But now she was not alone anymore.

As Emma had reached into her lunch box that afternoon, the sleeve of her jersey had shifted slightly, and although it was for no more than a few seconds, Bailey had seen the sure, defined, horizontal lines of that of a blade tattooed onto her wrist.  

She felt bad for wishing someone to feel the same pain as she did, but it was wonderful to find someone who actually understood what a self-harmer went through, the pain that they felt and not to mention the loneliness that it brought.

She was glad that Emma cut herself, as mean and selfish as that sounded. To Bailey it looked as if it was the perfect relationship where they could both benefit. They could both receive the support that they desired, and they could talk to one another about it without having to fear that they would be reported.

It was a difficult situation though, to have a cutter confide in you, not that Emma had confided in her yet, but Bailey hoped that she would eventually. It was difficult because there was a fine line between cutting and suicide, and the person that had been the chosen confidant of the self-harmer, had to discern whether it was necessary to get help immediately for the person, or to provide their own help.

On the one hand, reporting a cutter could only make things worse, as it was better to just let them talk about it. In a way, cutting was a release so that the person did not commit suicide, but then, there were also the suicidal cutters.

Once again however, suicidal people were divided into two groups, the passive suicidal people, and the active ones. Although neither was good, passive suicidal people were not likely to kill themselves, it was more a desire to be dead and less of a desire to kill themselves.

Active suicidal people however were defined by people who had a plan and a date to carry out their death, those were the ones who would benefit from being reported however difficult it may be to do so as it required a reach of trust. Although, in the end, you could not stop someone who was determined to kill themselves.

Bailey knew this because she had been passively suicidal before, but knowing that she needed to get help, she had called the suicide hotline and spoken to someone there who helped her to feel better.
 
She had not cut in a while or felt suicidal, which she was very proud of. It was like a record, and Bailey was a competitive person who tried to do better in things.
As Bailey stepped into the bath that night, she proudly glanced at the scars on her shoulder. It was her trophy, the symbol for beating depression, for getting out alive. As she slowly lowered herself into the tub, she made up her mind that she was going to help and support Emma to get her through her struggles.

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