My inner voice

Toh must have seen the caller ID since he exhales deeply.

"I'll get started on dinner. Is there anything you would like to eat?"

"Um, something with chicken?"

"Got it." Toh gently kisses her forehead before walking over to the kitchen.

'I wonder if I should ask him why he keeps kissing me like that. The kisses on my lips aside, what is with the forehead kisses?' They mean so much more to her than he may think. She feels at ease by his side, but when he does that, all the fears and worries she has vanished.

It's healing. Perhaps he noticed that too? It wouldn't surprise her. Toh is a psychologist.

She wonders if it is truly okay for her to get used to the kisses Toh gives her. It's not like they are in a relationship, so isn't this strange? Even if he wants to help her get better, he doesn't have to obey all her whims without questioning it. She wonders what Toh feels about all this kissing.

Sumire turned her attention back to her phone and answered Ru's call.

"Ki," Mamoru said happily.

Her gaze softened, hearing his tone. "For somebody who is being hospitalized, you sure seem cheerful."

"It's because I heard the news. You are going to be appearing in a music show soon?"

Sumire thinks back to the message she received in the morning. "Mm."

"That's great! This is going to be the first time. I can't wait for everybody to hear your voice."

He is so enthusiastic about it.

"To be honest with you, I'm a bit afraid."

Luckily she was in school today and not the company. She could preoccupy herself with class and push it to the back of her mind. When she received the message from the president, she felt a mixture of joy. But her entire body started trembling.

If she got into that state just by reading a message, would she actually be able to perform on stage?

"I thought so. That's why I decided to call you." Mamoru trails off. "Ki, have you finished reading those letters yet?"

"I haven't had the chance to recently."

Far too much has been happening.

"Then, if you find some time today, read them. They are the words of your fans who have been waiting for you this entire time."

"I've been making them wait for so long. I wonder why they are still waiting for me." Sumire mumbled.

She doesn't understand why they would wait for her. Why wait when there is no guarantee that she will debut? She has been putting it off for so long that it has to lead to many negative rumors.

Why do they still have so much faith and hope in her? They don't even know what she is like. How can they wait on somebody they do not know?

"Ki, are you near a TV right now?"

"Yes, I'm in the living room. Why?"

"Switch it on."

Sumire immediately follows Ru's instructions.

There was a news report on a talent contest happening abroad. The report focused on one particular contest. It was a man with black hair wearing a silver-colored mask. The mask was so detailed that it was hard to see the person's face. However, Sumire was different. Those clothes, that hair color - it can only be one person.

Since staying over at Toh's house, she has been avoiding any news regarding Yuhi. When she finally started going back to school, she was very careful when she was around others. Toh and the rest of her friends understood her feelings and have been helping her block out any news that involved Yuhi.

This was her first time seeing him since his sky performance.

Subconsciously she reached for the remote to switch it off but heard Ru's voice.

"Don't watch everything, Ki," Mamoru said.

"I-"

She can't. She doesn't want to hear it anymore. Yuhi is always singing for her and doing everything for her sake, even when he is in pain. She doesn't want to see him suffer anymore.

"I want to sing for my special person, even if she isn't here right now. I hope my voice will reach her. Now, this is my inner voice."

Sumire felt her heartbeat increase hearing those words. Yuhi didn't have to say a name. She already knew he would be singing for her. But, the last time he sang for her. It was so painful to listen to.

Can she truly listen to him sing for her again? If it wasn't for Ru on the other end of the phone, Sumire knew she would have immediately switched the TV off. But because Ru is comforting her.

Sumire takes a deep breath and turns her attention to the TV. She has to see this through.

"The candlelight goes out as sadness spreads.

I'm suffocating because of the chains of destiny.

A dull mood struggle, almost tearing my eardrums.

I'm waiting for love to shine a light in my heart.

It finally melts the silence."

Sumire's eyes widened. Ah, he really is stupid. He is singing for her again, and yet there is something different.

"Your shining tears are calling me

Asking me not to dodge anymore.

Your gentle touch melts my heart quietly.

Your smile is the sunshine of my day.

Like an angel, you spread your wings to embrace me.

I want to write a love song for you."

"The pure white light.

….breaks through the barriers of the past.

This is a love song that never ends."

By the end of the song, she was crying, and she felt Toh patting her back. He looks at the TV.

"Is that Terashima Yuhi?"

Sumire nods. Yuhi, Yuhi is such an idiot. Isn't he basically trying to say that no matter what happens, his feelings for her will never change? How could he still love her so deeply after she made him suffer so much? How could someone so smart be stupid to love someone like her?

"He cares for you," Toh commented.

"The idiot loves me."

"But?"

Sumire shakes her head. "We can't be together right now."

Yuhi understands that too. Right now, they can only indirectly confess their love for each other in their music. It's sad, but as long as they are aware of each other's feelings. Then there is still hope for the future. Did he join this contest to make up for hurting her last time? He is so silly. But this silly man loves her so dearly.

That's why she has to respond to his feelings properly in a place where everybody can hear her voice.