Chapter 23

Severus was getting older.

He could feel it in his back and knees each morning when he'd place his feet on the floor and his joints popped and cracked. His body felt stiff until he started moving around for the day.

This morning he woke early. He looked to the clock on his wall. It was only 5, the sun hadn't begun to rise yet.

He stretched his arms over his head and stretched. Then, there it was again, what woke him: the bangle around his wrist vibrating ever so gently. It warmed and cooled, warmed and cooled. It nearly felt like laboured breathing coming from the bracelet.

Severus lit the tip of his wand and brought it up to his eyes for better examination.

Despite having never taken it off, he'd felt nothing of the bracelet in two years. Why did it react this way now? Surely Harry had removed his own before he even left Hogwarts. Perhaps it was the magic wearing thin, and behaving strangely.

But the way he had before, Severus got a feeling from it. He couldn't quite explain it, but it felt like Harry was having a nightmare.

He'd often experienced Harry's nightmares through the walls at the safehouse.

Severus doubted a bangle around a sleeping man's wrist could provide any comfort; but he was willing to try.

He whispered a calming spell against the bracelet, hoping that it might somehow give Harry some relief from whatever tormented him in his sleep so early in the morning.

The bracelet gave one last weak vibration, like an exhalation of relief. He hoped Harry was sleeping better now.

Severus stepped into his kitchen, the soles of his feet protesting against the cold stone floor.

The post had already been delivered.

His eyes skipped over the Daily Prophet, and right for the letter placed to the side of it.

The handwriting looked familiar but he couldn't quite place it. Surely a former student. He received post from alumni occasionally.

He tore it open haphazardly and pulled the card out.

You are cordially invited to the wedding of Draco Lucius Malfoy and Harry James Potter.

Severus let the card fall to the floor. He took a shaky step backwards and sunk into the wooden chair behind him.

He'd always believed he and Harry would one day find their ways back to one another. Had he waited too long? He had, hadn't he?

But what's changed? The large gap in age still existed. Harry was barely out of school, out of his teen years. Severus was still incapable of giving Harry the life he so deserved.

How much time would solve that?

Another year? Another decade?

It didn't matter. He'd missed his chance.

Severus took his breakfast in his rooms. He attempted to busy his mind but it was moot. He had a list of items he needed to purchase that he'd been putting off. Perhaps a day in town would divert his mind, though shopping was a task he loathed.

Once the day was well under way, Severus pulled on robes that were decent enough to be seen in and walked into Hogsmeade.

He purchased potions ingredients he needed from Knockturn Alley and then made his way into more appropriate shops for the less illicit items on his list.

Then, there it was, just as Hermione had told him:

Emerald Books

So named for the colour of Lily's (and Harry's) eyes, the adjective Severus had once used to describe them to Harry so long ago.

Severus stood outside for a long moment, staring at the sign. It was an old brick building. The huge wooden sign was well made and attractive, hanging proudly over the green door.

Severus's feet propelled him forward, seemingly of their own volition. A bell rang over head as he pushed the door open.

"One moment!" A pleasantly familiar voice called out.

Severus looked over the shelves of well organized books. Each shelf was labeled with a different genre. Some especially prolific, popular authors had their own bookcases.

Severus heard footsteps and looked up. Harry had a parchment in his hand that he read over.

"I'm getting in a new shipment of-" Harry looked up. Their eyes met. That face hadn't changed at all, except his jaw was now more angular and he had a fuller five o'clock shadow.

Harry's lips parted slightly, his eyebrows rose, expressing complete surprise.

Regaining his composure, Harry swallowed and set aside the paper onto the counter.

"Hi."

"You own a bookstore."

"Yes, I do."

Severus looked around once more, then back to Harry. "Is business well?"

"Er, yeah. So far."

"I like the name you chose."

Harry seemed to ease a bit at the compliment.

"Thank you." Harry smoothed his hand over his hair, but it was a pointless effort. The hair was still untamable. He stepped forward but paused. Severus took a deep breath and took a couple of steps forward as well, now putting them at arms length.

"Any recommendations?"

"Huh? Oh, er, you've likely already read all of the mystery or crime novels I have at the moment."

Severus couldn't help but grin. "You remembered."

"Of course I did. All of this is for you."

"I'm sorry?"

Harry's eyes widened in panic and embarrassment. "I meant- I meant because of you. I enjoy reading because of you. Gave me the idea." Harry shook his head and smiled awkwardly. "Anyways, how have you been?"

"Well. I trust you are?"

Harry shrugged.

"Thank you for the invitation to your nuptials."

"My what?"

"The wedding."

"He invited you?"

Severus's stomach rose into his chest, making him feel nauseated. Of course Harry hadn't invited him. Draco had.

"It seems so."

"I had nothing to do with the invitations," Harry explained hurriedly. "It's not that I wouldn't want you there. I guess i just didn't know if you'd want to come."

Before Severus could think, he reached out to grasp Harry's wrist gently. Though it was concealed, Severus felt the cold metal of the bangle beneath his palm.

"You still wear it."

Harry looked away, his cheeks tinted pink. "I never took it off. I know it's silly." Harry added more quietly, "I suppose I wasn't ready to let you go."

Severus's heart stuttered.

He cleared his throat and released Harry's wrist.

"Did you have a nightmare early this morning?"

Harry looked up from where he had fixated his eyes on the ground.

"How did you know?"

Severus raised his own arm, allowing his sleeve to fall to his elbow, exposing the bracelet. He hadn't bothered to conceal it for some time now.

Harry smiled. "Sorry if I woke you."

"You did, but I didn't mind. Did you- it's that I sent a message through to you. You might not have noticed, given that you were sleeping."

"What did you send?"

"A calming spell."

Harry rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly.

"I think I got it."

Severus felt true joy at knowing he could still offer Harry something, even something as small as a few extra hours of sleep.

"I hope this won't be the last time I see you, Harry."

"I'll send you an owl," Harry promised.

Severus gently took Harry's hand and brought it to his lips. He kissed the back of his hand then strode from the book shop in a flourish of black robes.

Severus had been wrong. Oh, he'd been so wrong. He could make Harry happy. He could offer him a life worth living.

He didn't care if it ruined his relationship with the Malfoys forever, he was going to have Harry's love once more.

Severus deserved happiness, too.

Didn't he?