Not as planned

Jesse's pov

I took in a deep breath as I stand infont of Benson's gate 

This is insane and ridiculous just as Jennie has said .

Getting married to Benson in just a space of one month after searching for him for the past twelve years was really ridiculous

He said he loves me even without remembering me and that will I hold on to .

If he eventually gets his memory I will explain things to him and we can finally live together as a happy family with Lilly.

I went for the door and knocked on the gate for a while before someone came running out .

"You must be miss Lilly ".she said those words with a smile on her face .

"Yes".I smiled back at her 

"Please come in ".she opens the gate for me and let me in .

I stared around and noticed the house was well constructed and beautifully designed ,indeed Benson was good at what he does .

"Please follow me ".the lady I assume was the house keeper led the way .

I followed her and entered the house .

"Where is Lilly?" I asked the moment I step inside the house 

"She went out with a friend of sir Benson but will be back soon".

"Okay ".

"Please follow me ".she climbs the stairs and I followed her 

We passed two rooms upstairs before she stood at a door 

"This is you and sir bedroom ".she open the door and I went in 

"Call me if you need anything" she muttured out those words and smiled at me before leaving the room .

I kept my bag on the floor and stared around .

Indeed the room was big ,too big for one person .

I stared around and saw pictures of benson and charity happily smilling at each other .

I went to the photo and gently ran my fingers tips on it .

They look so much happy and in love that I felt like an intruder 

I move away from the picture and my eyes fell on a picture and I couldn't get my eyes off it .

The picture was Benson smilling happily while he held baby Lilly in his hands ,one don't need to be told that he really loves this child,and I was glad I was able to help him keep her with him .

I move away from the picture and met a family photo .

The moment I saw the photo I became scared and worried .

The picture frame was a picture of Benson, charity , Lilly and Benson's Aunt.

I stared at Benson's aunt in the picture and wondered why she didn't say anything about me when Benson showed her my picture,this was strange really strange .

I was still staring at the picture when the door open and Benson walked in with no expression on his face like he wasn't happy to see me .

"Hi". I waved my hands at him with a smile .

"Hi ".he replied with a cold rough voice that I wondered what was wrong .

He stares at me for a while before sitting on the couch .

"We have to write down some rules".he spoke firmy.

I stared at him shocked and confused

"Here ". he brought out a sheet of paper and handed the sheet to me .

I stared at him before taking the papper from his hand .

"You can read and memorize it ".he Spoke firmy.

I stared at him and wondered what was going on .

I look at the paper in my hand confused before reading through it .

"Rule one ,no touching of each other's things" I read it loud and stared at him shocked

"Rule two ,no invading of  each other personal life "

"Rule three ,no touching of Charity's belongings "

"Rule four ,no sex".

"Rule five, divorce after four month of marriage".I read out loud.

"That's is the most important rule ".he spoke in a cold voice that I haven't heard him use on me even when we were in California.

"What's the meaning of all this ".I spoke in anger while throwing the paper on the floor .

"Those are the rules you will have to follow".he spoke firmy 

"Rules for what ?" I yelled in anger 

He stood up from the couch and walk up to me ,he stood before and stared at me with so much anger and hatred and I wonder why he was reacting this way .

"I made it clear to you that I love charity and no one else ".he muttured out those words like he meant .

"We only got married because you wanted to help me not because I love you ".he muttured out those words like he meant it .

I was shocked and confused hearing those words from him ,he confessed his love for just few days ago and here he is saying he doesn't love me.

"So all this is just for a period of four months ?" I asked in pain 

I knew he had told me that if I don't want the relationship I can file for a divorce after the next four month but I never thought of it because I thought they will be no need for that since Benson and I loved each other .

With shaking legs I sat on the bed while staring at the paper in my hand .

I was ashamed of myself and the stupid decision I made .

He stood up from the couch and stared at me one more time before leaving the room .

The moment he left I thought for a while and ten rehalization hits me

Benson aunt might have told him everything because this Benson right in front of me was totally different from the Benson I met in California .

In this Benson's eyes I could see anger and hatred towards me and that could mean only one thing

His aunt had told him something about me 

I was still in thought when I heard the sound of the door 

"Miss Jesse".I heard Lilly's voice from the door 

I turn and saw Lilly smilling happily at me

"You are finnaly here ".she giggled happily and gave me a tight hug .

I hugging Lilly I realized how much Lilly loves Benson and it will hurt her so much of she is separated from him.

Benson's pov

I left the room and walk into the sitting room  and saw that Lilly was already back with Dan .

"Good day papa". Lilly gave me a tight hug

"How was your day princess?" I asked while I caress her hair 

"It was fun, uncle took me to this big movie festival and I watched a lot of movies".she giggled happily 

"That was fun I'm glad you enjoyed yourself".

She smiled at me and look around 

"Where is miss Jesse"Lilly asked while staring around 

"She is upstairs , please take her upstairs".I handed Lilly over to the house keeper.

She took Lilly from me and they both went upstairs .

"And who is miss Jesse".he asked while staring at me with curiosity 

I ignored him and sat on the couch because I didn't know what to say to him 

"Benson?" He calls out to me 

"I can hear you man ".I mummured

"If you can hear me then answer my question who is Jesse".he asked impatiently.

"Do you care for a drink ?" I asked while getting up from the couch and walked over to the bar 

"I'm not a drunk ,and if I need a drink I know where to get them".he stood up from the couch and stood before me 

"Who is Jesse?" He asked firmly .

I ignored him , pour out a drink in a glass cup and drank all at once .

"Lilly has been talking about this Jesse all through our drive back home and how she might be her new step mother and I wondered who this Jesse was and why you haven't told me about her ".he muttured out in a serious tune

This was one thing that's frustrates me ,he always what to know what is going on in my life since charity passed away .

"Let's talk about this outside".I took the bottle of whiskey and two glasses and we left the sitting room.

We got to the garden and we both sat beside each other.

"Have this ".I handed a glass to him which he took .

"I'm listening".he spoke up impatiently.

"It's a long story but I will cut it short ".I took a sip of my drink before I began telling him all that happened in my life before we met each other .

After I finished talking I took a sip of my drink to calm down my nerves .

Remembering and talking about my past always bring back a familiar pain to me that was caused by one person and I hated it.

"This is unbelievable ".he spoke shocked and confused .

"So you decided to make her pay for what she did to you by getting married to her ".he asked in amused

"Yes ,she has to taste an atom of my pain ".I spoke firmy.

"This is ridiculous man ". He spoke in anger 

"You don't know a thing, you don't fucking know a thing ".i yelled in anger 

"I went through pains because of this girl ,my aunt went through pains because of she and here you are telling me that I should let it go". I spoke in so much anger 

I took a sip of my drink to calm down my nerve .

We sat there in silence and none of us said a word.

"So what are your plans ?" Dan asked

I ignored him and took a sip of my drink .

I stood up from the chair and took in a deep breath before speaking up 

"I just want her to feel an atom of pain I felt twelve years ago ,and believe me I still feel pains in my despite it has been twelve years ago".I spoke in pain and anger .

He stood up from the chair and moved closer to me .

"You have to let it go Benson all this was some childish mistake you should be holding on to the past like this ".he tried convincing me ,but I wouldn't have it .

"I will only be at peace when I know she must have felt what I felt ,after that I will tell I remembered everything and break up the marriage with her ".I spoke firmy

"This is ridiculous very ridiculous".he shakes his head and left me in the garden.

I took in deep and took a sip of my drink ,I closed my eyes and memories of that night came flashing in my head.

My hear still beat in pain despite it was a long time ago and I couldn't help it .

"Here you are ".I heard Jesse's voice from behind me 

I groaned in anger and turn around to face her 

"What is it ".I asked in anger 

"Don't you dare benson don't you dare us that tune with me ". she replied in anger 

I stared at her shocked and confused ,she was totally different from the Jesse I spoke few minutes ago with .

"I need to talk to you ".she walk up to me and stood before me 

"I would have left this house and this marriage right now but I won't and all that is because of Lilly and not because of you "

"I know she loves you so much and it will hurt her to stay away from you so I will do this for her and not for you".she spoke firmy .

I chuckled softly and took a sip of my drink , looking at her I saw the old Jesse I knew twelve years ago who wouldn't take nonsense from anyone and I find it very interesting .

"I was blinded by the love I have for you and rush into a silly agreement with you but I don't regret any bit of it because I'm doing this for Lilly ".she stood up from the chair and stared right into my eyes .

"Just four month and after four month I will be done with this marriage , but don't you dare think because I'm in love with you you can play me for a fool ,I'm way bigger than that ".

She stared at me for a while like she was trying to read through me before she spoke up .

"I thought I knew you Benson but obviously I was wrong , you are a totally different person ".she muttured out those words and Walk way from me 

"You are right you made me a different person"