Chapter Nine

I needed to stay away from all that toxic atmosphere. I took a deep breathe in. A break away from that house. I walked towards the park and found a place to sit.

Before I knew what was happening I drifted off in a day dream about the day when my engagement with Jake turns out to be real.

I saw him become everything I ever wanted him to be. I saw him love me and my child. I imagined his lips on mine. Kissing me so passionately and my thoughts got interrupted when my phone started to ring.

It's Nate. I told him I'm at the park and he came over.

"Nate, welcome back." I ran and hugged him. I started sobbing on his shoulder. "Nate, I missed you a lot. You left me to face the world all by myself."

He pulled me out of his embrace and wiped my face with his thumb.

"Princess, what's wrong?"

"I went through a lot in your absence. I always wished you were with my to comfort me but it never happened." I managed to say.

"I don't get what you're saying. Just please talk to me." He said with concern.

"I wish I could just spell it out to you like that. You'd never accept me again. You'd leave me and then I'll be all by myself again."

"I need you to be calm and talk to me. Take deep breaths." Nate advised me, trying to calm me as I cried uncontrollably.

I nodded and wiped my face with the back of my hand. Slowly, I regained my composure and started to talk.

"What I'm about to tell you happened before we actually started dating. Sometimes I actually wished I had agreed to date you before this happened and then maybe I would have had things under control." I paused for a while and Nate interrupted.

"I don't still understand what you're saying. Please be straightforward with me." He sounded frustrated already.

My palms were getting all sweaty and I didn't know what exactly to do. I feared that I wouldn't like his reaction.

"Nate please forgive me. It happened before we started dating."

He looked at me looking confused. "What happened? You're still beating around the bush."

"I'm pregnant. I'm pregnant for Jake."

"Tell me you're joking."

"No I'm serious. My parents even insisted I get engaged to him if I wanted to have the child."

"So what do you mean?"

"I'm engaged to Jake." He stared blankly at me before dropping my hand to step back.

"How could you be so careless? Why didn't you tell me? So you're engaged right? Wow. Great news. So when am I getting the card?" He yelled at me and I noticed the emotions in his eyes. Hurt, betrayal.

I shook my head in confusion, "what are you talking about?"

"Your wedding invite. When do I get mine?" He spat.

"Nate please don't talk like that, I need you to understand me. Please don't leave me. You're all I have left. Nate please." I said quietly as tears fell down my cheeks.

He shook his head. "Nicole, I can't do this anymore. What did you expect, that I accept another man's child as my own or that especially that jerk and at this age? You must be joking." I felt my words stuck in my throat as I stared at him.

He continued, "All the while I was after you, pleading that you give us a chance you were busy throwing your legs wide open for that brat to drill you. You're cheaper than I thought."

I took a step back with tears blurring my vision. His last words kept ringing in my ears. You're cheaper than I thought.

I couldn't even defend my self. I just kept shut and let him rain down his anger on me. When I felt he was done, I took a step forward and held his right hand in my both palms but he shook me off.

"Nate, I know I made a mistake. But please just give us another chance. I'm so lonely right now and I may lose my mind any moment from now. Please don't turn your back on me." I kept sobbing silently.

He looked at me for a short while and then steps forward as though he wants to pull me in his embrace before turning on his heels away from the park.

I looked down at my feet and cried some more. Only if I wasn't so intrigued by Jake at the beginning then maybe things would have gone differently for us.

After a while, I pulled myself together before walking back home.

On getting into the house, I walked into Jake again.

"Nicole, why are your eyes swollen? Have you been crying all day?"

"What? Why do you care? It's because of you I lost Nate. Now he's gone. He doesn't want me again. Stay away from me. It's because of you that I've lost everything that made sense to me. First my life, then my parents and now my boyfriend." I managed to croak out wiping my tears away.

I expected him to turn and walk out on me angrily but instead he just hugged me and I hugged him back without thinking twice. I felt him stiffen at my immediate response but I still didn't let go. All of a sudden, I felt warm and safe in his embrace. I felt safe in the embrace of the only person that shattered my life.

"Don't cry. I'm here for you." I didn't respond to him and he carried me upstairs to my room in a bridal style. I lay my head on his chest during the short walk to my room. He lay me on my bed and wiped my face.

"Crying is not healthy for you, especially not now. Don't stress yourself shedding tears for him. I think he'll come back."

Shocked by his words, I stared straight into his eyes for a while before he avoided my eyes. I expected him to say its a good thing he left or something worse.

"You have to take care of yourself and your.... our...." He paused thinking of what to say.

"You have to take care of the baby too." With that he walked out of my room.

My heart was so heavy with pain and I felt so helpless.

After Jake exited my room, I kept staring at my phone every moment to see if he'd call or at least text me but nothing came in till I drifted off to sleep.