Ch 03 - Devil Fruit!

"Holy shit I'm in One Piece…A fictional show…of crazy pirates… and crazy marines…holly shit how the fuck is this real! How can this shit happen? Are all anime real? Am I in a coma or something? Am I currently in the hospital and this is all fake?" I kept asking myself questions about this situation that I find myself in, but guess what, no one fucking answers!

Then I asked "Wait am I in a fucking Isekai? Did I perhaps die or some shit? Hmmm I don't remember dying…to be honest I don't remember too much at all, I don't remember my name or any of my family and friends faces and names…shit its one of these scenarios…where the protagonist remembers everything about life except for the most important and personal shit of their life… not that I am the protagonist right??? Hmm even if I am I can't think like that since if I get too cocky, I will just die off like any other schmuck. Even Luffy has been close to dying plenty of times."

As I'm asking myself all of these questions and going through a mini breakdown I get startled back to the present with a loud womanly scream of "noooooo". And when I face the situation that I completely ignored I see a scene that may haunt my dreams for the rest of my life (or not).

It's a foxy getting his right arm chopped off at the shoulder by a large machete due to trying to defend himself from the huge cold weapon with what seems to be a flimsy looking whip that he pulled from his pants; this resulted in bone and blood spraying all over the place, the grass, the dirt, the rocks, it's all stained red; I can even see the bloodied smiling face of that crazy long arms giant.

It appears that while I was lost in thought the world kept moving forward, and this fucked up situation happened.

What follows is as foxy holds onto his bleeding stump with his remaining hand and screaming bloody murder the giant raising up his machete above his head and swiftly and coldly swinging it down in between foxies hair peaks all the way into his skull. Which results in brain matter, bone fragments and blood once again fountaining out of foxy.

When I see this, I freak out and start immediately throwing up, this is the first time that I see something like this, and it is truly disgusting.

I mean one second everyone is fine and alive and the next second all I see is someone's life being snuffed out like a candle in the wind, it's just too much.

This leads me to stumble away in fear but also increases my rate of retching.

And as I was retching all over the ground it seems that the murderer heard my puking sounds because he turns to me and says, "oh would you look at that, we have got ourselves a peeper, well I'm sorry buddy but you can't tell anyone what you saw here, especially about the Davy Back Fight."

He starts walking towards me in large gaits, and he continues: "I would have taken you back with me to forget about all of this and have fun with that bitch over there with me and the boys, but this matter is about our honor as pirates, so no one must know, and that chick back there won't know how to do anything other than being a real bitch real soon, so you gotta go buddy".

As he walks closer to me, I can clearly see the difference in size between a giant and myself, I barely reach his waist for fucks sake! From my perspective his silhouette slowly covers the sky.

I walk backwards trying to get away from this crazy maniac, but I trip on some roots and fall on my ass.

The giant roars in laughter," HAHAHAHA the cliché backwards fall!" and continues moving towards me at a steady nonchalant pace, like he knows he's already won.

Which would likely be the case, if not for the memory that just randomly popped into my mind. I remember that foxy, the guy that's just a bleeding corpse now, having an interesting devil fruit in canon, the Slow-Slow Fruit!

I was wondering why he didn't use it on this long-armed giant, he should be able to easily win that way. Afterall It's a fruit that basically makes any target of said fruit extremely slow for up to 30 seconds! Its basically a cheat for most situations.

And as I'm trying to think of what could have happened a sudden memory comes to me; I distinctly remember the horrible aftertaste in my mouth after I woke up and that disgusting looking purple goop that landed on the grass after I wretched some of it up.

The dots connect together which in the end leads me to believe that I somehow got to eat that fruit before I was conscious!

And definitely before foxy could get to it, to confirm this idea I believe that this was the moment foxy got his fruit in the original!

He must have run away from this guy and found it near the cliffs edge and ate it out of desperation for survival.

So going off of this idea I put my hands in in a spider man pose, which I believe is what foxy does in canon, and yell with all my might "Slow-Slow Beam!"