Waking up in a hospital

Just like the chapter title says, when I woke up I was in a hospital that was located two towns over. I remember that my mom wasn't around when I woke up and when a nurse came in to check on me..

"Oh your awake. I'll go let them know." She said to me with surprise and a little bit of happiness in her voice.

The next thing I knew I was feeling sleepy so I closed my eyes. I was awake just long enough to hear someone say, "I thought you said that his eyes where opened and that he was looking around."

"I swear doctor, he was looking around just a few minutes ago."

"It doesn't matter, if he is sleepy let him sleep his body has been thr....," At that point in time the doctors voice trailed off, I can only assume that I did fall back to sleep.

I don't know how long I was really in that hospital, but to me, it felt like at least, or maybe 3 weeks. Either way it was a very long time for a bored kid to be in a hospital.

I remember a nurse asking me for my age and me asking her what year it was so I can do the math. I know that I wasn't attending preschool or kindergarten. I wasnt old enough at the time. I do remember me ask where my mom was and that the nurse was confused. They said an older lady was the one that dropped me off but she wasn't there anymore.

I remember asking her how long ago but I don't remember her reply. I do remember feeling sad because no one was coming to see me. I remember thinking, "Don't I have any family? Aunts? Uncle? Grandparents? Where are they? Do they know where I am? Does any one even care about me? How can mom forget that she locked me in that room? How do you forget that you have a child? Do you not love me? Was I suppose to just die? Was she trying to...Does she not want me? Does anyone want me?"

("I do." said a wet, gravelly voice as it faded away.)

<???> Rubbing my head and wiping the tears from my red puffy eyes, " My head hurts, my eyes hurts, even my face hurts. Maybe I should sleep." and I did just that.

While at the hospital, that I'm sure was located in Zanesville, I was hooked up to a drip to keep me hydrated and to check my heart rate and breathing.

[I remember is going to be repeated throughout this small book alot so please forgive me. 🙏 ]

At some point in this memory a nurse walks in and I think she seat down and she started to ask me questions.

Nurse: "Hello my name is.....and I'm a nurse here at .....hospital in Zanesville. Do you know what your name is?"

"My name is Codie, nice to met you." I say to her as I force a smile.

"So polite." I think she murmured, "Do you know how old you are?"

I shook my head, "No, I'm sorry, I don't even know the date is."

I think she said, "Oh it's friday." and I remember letting out a little laugh and saying, "No, hehe, I mean the year silly. hehe."

"Oh, that's what you meant? lol." she said embarrassingly.

"It's all goody." I said back to her.

"Do you know why you are here?" she ask me.

"I remember being in my play room and then I woke up here."

She looks at me all seriously and says, "I don't know if I should telling you since you so young and might not understand so if you hear a word that doesn't so familiar or sounds funny, let me know and I'll try to help you understand it that best I can. Okay."

"O-kay." I said to her with a small excitement growing in my heart.

I don't know if it was because I was going to be getting some answers or just because I was finally getting to talk with someone, maybe both.

The nice nurse said, "When you came here you were severely dehydrated and malnourished."

"So I was really hungry and thristy.." I said in a questioning kinda tone.

"Yes! Thats right. You are very smart." She replied as my face turn a slight shade of red.

Then she continued, "You also had a fever of 114°F. Can you tell me what really happened?"

I opened my mouth but passed and I hesitated. For some reason I remember thinking about children's homes, orphanages and the horror stories that go hand in hand with them.

She must have saw the fear on my face or in my eyes, because she changed the subject.

"Can you tell me about that lady that dropped you off several days ago? Is she your Grandma? or your Mom?"

"I passed out in my bedroom, do you know what the person that brought me in looked like?" I ask her but judging from the look on her face I already do the answer so before she could reply.

"I live at home with my mom, so it might have been her. Yeah I positive that it was my mom si nce it's just the two of us."

"Well that is some good news." She said as she made a note of it.

"Do you know your phone number or address?" she asked?

"No." I said softly while shaking my head.

I must have had a look on my face because she said, "Hey it's okay. You're doing awesome."

That made me feel a little better and slightly happier.

"What about her job? Do you know what she does for a living?"

Shaking my head and while looking down I said, "No, but sometimes I see her wearing clothes like yours." I pointed

"OK, ok. so she could be a nurse like me or she could work at a home for old people. Which one do you think?"

I shrugged my shoulders, "It's hard to tell." I said while doing something goofy to make her laught.

I don't know why I felt the need to make her laught, maybe it was to help me coop with the situation at hand. Thoughts slowly started to feel my head as she kept asking me more questions.

Nurse: "Do you know you grandparents address or phone number?"

I reply with a sad "No" but I say kinda happily "But I do know how to get there if I had a way there."

"That's awesome. Can you tell us any street names or anything like that?" she asked enthusiastically.

"No..." I said dejectedly, I'm not good with names just faces...I do know that it's near (What was the name of that town. come on brain work?!).... newlexington? yeah newlex that was it's name."

"Newlexinton huh? Do you know how to get there from Zanesville?" she ask.

"No" I said and you could she her shoulder slump all dejectedly. "You can get there from crooksville or even from Lake Isabella." I said to her and she perked up a little.

"Humm, let me think. You leave Crooksville and you take that country road that twist and turns like this." I said as I moved my whole arm to show how the road was supposed to go.

"What about how to get there from that lake you mentioned." She said and I knew that I wasn't helping at all.

"Well you leave Lake Isabella and you make a right and then you make a left like you are going to get icecream at the icecream place. I think it dairy queen or cream and you keep going that way and grandpa's house if you get to Newlex then you when too far." I said happily, thinking I was a big helper. Then I looked at the nurse and she had this confused look on her face.

("Oh no did I do something wrong.") "My directions are pretty bad huh?" I said as I started to cry. "I want to go home, I miss my family. I don't want to be here anymore I just want.... " tears and wails filled the room and I broke down and cried uncontrollably.

("What did I do to deserve this? Where is my mommy? why doesn't anyone care about me? Fine! if she doesn't want me then I don't want her. I don't know anyone in my familys first name, or there phone or address. I knew I was to young to be discharged on my own and I knew that home was too far to walk.")

"There..there it will be okay." The nurse said has I think she patted my back.

I wiped my tears and took a big breathe and said, "I don't think my mom cares about me."

The nurse was about to say something but I continue with, "If she cared then where is she? Why did she lock me in a room without food and water? Someone said I was severely dehydrated and malnourished when I got here and I had a fever of 114°F? I don't know how long it takes for that to happen but it's not something that just happens over night. Right?"

Disbelief was on her face and she looked a me for a second before she understood that I was asking her a question. "No, you are right. It takes time for that to happen."

"See.. So she must not love me." I said as I remembered looked out the window at that point.

After that my days where filled with my young self in a hospital bed while I answered question from this old lady from children services.

Just the same question day after with "are you sure" thrown in every once in a while. After about a week of answering the same damn question over and over and over and over and over and i was still in that fucking hospital and Noone came from the outside world. I finally said, "Enough, I can't take this anymore I made it all up. It never happened."

"What do you mean?!" She asked angerly

"I mean I had a fever of 114, I must have imagined it all."

"What!! You imagined it. You lied to us to me."

"I had a fever of 114 when I go here ask the nurses, so its possible I could have imagined it."

She left the room in a huff and then came back shorty later and this is what she said to me.

"They did confirm that you did have a high fever, but what you did is inexcusable. I hope your mother beats your ass black and blue. That she breaks your arm and says you fell climbing a tree. If you where my son and you did that to me I would have put you in the darks corner of the worst orphanage and you would rot there."

She stormed out and I never saw her agian.

After that crazy experience, I asked a nurse for some paper so I can draw a map to see if that would help.

Shortly afterwards, she came back with it and I drew the way from Lake Isabella to grandpa's house. Let's just say a few days later my mom came all worried that she was going to jail. I guess that based on the fact that she looked nervous and was acting paranoid. It wasn't until we were in the car and out of the parking lot when she said. "I was so worried..."

Then there was a long pause...(Mind you, I remember staring at her ...maybe glaring is the right word to use....glaring at her the whole time)..."about you.." She finally finished.

I just scoffed and ask, "Where were you thinking whole time?"

"What is you mean,.."Where was I?"....I was working so I can make money to take care of you.

"I was in that hospital for so long...weeks went by and you never visited or called."

"I didn't have the gas money to come up here. I had to make money, and I suppose to loss my job. "

"Why didn't anyone come to visit? I was there for a month. Didn't you tell grandpa and grandma where I was? Did they even ask?"

"I haven't talked to them, I was afraid dad...." and then she shivered as if remembering something traumatic.

The side of my face she couldn't see was smirking. It wasn't right to feel good that something traumatic happen to her when she was young. I was hurt that she abandoned me in fear of what the law would have done to her.

I knew that she would have been fine in jail, she might have had to a little time for child neglect, abandonment, and maybe even child endangerment charges but she would have been fine. But those horror stories of orphanages in the late 80's where truly scary to me. So I chose to stay with that woman, in hopes that she wouldn't try to kill me agian. She asked if I was hungry and I nodded so we went to Micky D's and she fed me. Then back in the car we went and down the road we go. It took me a while before I realized that we weren't going home.