Ch 4 a wonderful guy

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After the bullying incident, as Lily had taken to calling it, things had been rather strained between herself and the so-called Marauders. Although the tension surprised her, Lily was really quite disappointed in Potter's actions. She had hoped that his 'great change' had been something more than a mere trick to get into her pants.

Lily was also furious with herself for how hopeful she had been as to Potter's change, and she took it all out on the boy/man who had deceived her so.

For the next several weeks, Lily refused to give James Potter so much as a hallway 'hullo', ignoring the pompous toerag completely whenever she happened to run into him. Even when he cornered her in the Gryffindor Common Room one day, begging for her forgiveness, Lily had given him nothing more than a single look of disgust before walking away. Afterward, he had finally taken the hint and started giving Lily the much-desired space she needed.

Still, it was more difficult to ignore James Potter than she expected. Her daily rejections of Potter had apparently become such a major part of her routine that it had Lily Evans rather out of sorts that he no longer disturbed her. What was worse, Gryffindor Tower had become much less of a refuge than usual, as her fellow Gryffindors had taken to giving her odd looks whenever they saw her. Lily Evans and James Potter's 'relationship' and arguments had always been a great source of entertainment, so now that the Quidditch captain was so woebegone lately, the blame had fallen on her.

Normally, Lily would have used this intra-house fallout as an opportunity to get ahead on her classwork, perhaps experimenting in potions or what-not. However, that idea was brought to a crashing halt by the other male that had been bothering her for the past months, even if it was by his absence rather than his presence: Severus Snape. Her plans to just buy the ingredients she needed for any experimentation had run into a few snags once she started needing more expensive and unusual reagents.

This presented a great problem for Lily, as Professor Slughorn was still determined to get the two former friends talking to one another again, and he refused to talk to Severus on her behalf, no matter how much she pleaded with him. Eventually, Lily had had little choice but to buckle down and talk to her traitorous ex-best-friend. That was why she was now standing in front of the Potions classroom, glaring at the door as multi-colored fumes slipped out from between the ancient entryway's cracks. Lily had no other option but to talk to Severus now.

Still, she had no intention of enjoying it.

Finally, with nothing better to do, Lily gave three knocks on the dungeon door before waiting for Severus to permit her entrance. As an experienced Potioneer herself, Lily knew better than to barge in on someone in the process of working on a recipe-the time that Petunia had nearly killed them all when she interrupted Lily right as she was about to add in sulfur had certainly taught her that lesson. As such, Lily soon found herself settling in to wait, as apparently Severus was right in the middle of something.

'Just great... My timing is clearly impeccable...' Lily felt a sudden wince rush through her as she remembered countless similar incidents before the great betrayal. When he was busy, Severus had a tendency of being hip-deep in the preparation of no less than five different potions. This was no exception. 'He hasn't changed in this, just in everything else...'

It was another five minutes before the door opened with a thud, while Severus Snape's voice made itself heard, speaking icily, "Whoever is there, you can come in now. Just don't bother me. I have more important things with which I am occupied at the moment."

Lily rolled her eyes as she stepped inside. For all that Severus complained about James Potter's arrogance, he certainly took himself far too seriously, especially since he had taken up with those boys. However, it was understandable why he was being so pig-headed, she supposed; Severus' pride was only eclipsed by his ability when it came to Potions-work.

'Shame that it's all going to be 'for the glory of the Dark Lord',' mused the annoyed redhead, idly watching her ex-best-friend as he flitted from cauldron to cauldron, stirring here and chopping there, just like he always had. 'I'd bet that Perseus bloke would be completely flummoxed with half of Severus' potions ideas.'

Severus seemed not to have realized her presence, as he blinked in surprise when he finally turned around and looked at her, several emotions flitting across his face. For a moment, Lily felt a strange urge to laugh at how nonplussed her former friend appeared to be, but the shock soon vanished from his face, leaving only a placid smoothness reminiscent of an undisturbed lake. Whatever emotions had lain there before were gone now.

Turning back to his cauldrons, Severus then asked in a flat, emotionless voice, "What do you want, Lily?"

For a fleeting instant, Lily found herself angered that she meant so little to her former friend that he was able to speak with so little care in his voice. She was about to call him out on his apparent indifference...but then she supposed that if she had really meant anything to him he wouldn't have called her that to begin with.

Swallowing as she reminded herself of the fact that Severus was no longer her friend and vice-versa, Lily instead said in a tone of forced calm, "You've been taking all of the extra ingredients for your experiments." As he looked at her in an inscrutable manner, Lily felt the need to clarify. "I need some of them for my own work you see..." She trailed off, the utter lack of emotion on Severus' face creating a situation far too surreal for her. Severus calmly watched her, not saying a word, even as she said in a near-whisper, "We should share..."

Several moments passed, then Severus said in a frank, neutral tone, "Just write down whatever ingredients you need on a list and put it by the door each week. I'll make sure to leave what you asked for. Is that fine?"

There were several things Lily Evans wanted to say, questions she wanted to ask the emotionless boy who had replaced her former friend:

"Do you feel anything anymore, Severus?"

"Why do you act as if our friendship was nothing?"

"Can't you show some shred of remorse that it ended?"

"Did I mean nothing to you?"

Instead, she merely said, "Uh...sure, that sounds fine."

"Good." Severus then turned back to his cauldrons, not sparing a backwards glance at her as he got back to work.

Strange feelings filling her, Lily fled.

Lily's situation wasn't made any easier when Perseus' owl arrived. As with last time, his owl ignored the normal rules of Hogwarts and entered her room via her window, scrabbling madly on the glass. Additionally, the owl left the present of its excrement right on the shoulder of Lily's shirt as it passed, hooting madly as it flew back out the window.

After the letter Perseus had sent prior to bullying incident, Lily had attempted to persuade her onerous pen-pal to her point of view about the Dark Arts...to little effect.

He was even more obstinate than Severus had ever been, refusing to agree with her in the slightest. Unfortunately, his refusals to agree with her were backed up with a form of twisted logic...but it was logic of the sort that Lily knew underlay every form of rank stupidity in the world, such as the Muggleborn prejudice of the Slytherins.

However, this time it appeared that Perseus irked by something else. He seemed more than slightly annoyed by her minor mentioning of Potter in her last couple of letters...

Medusa,

I have long ago grown bored of your continual mention of this 'Fred' character. Henceforth, please forgo speaking of him when you feel the tiresome need to contact me. I have enough fools to deal with already, for your information. However, I will suggest that you deal best with him with a lovely dose of the 'Bat-Bogey' hex, as you are unwilling to use the Dark Arts in your foolishness.

If you were willing to consider them though, might I recommend the 'Flesh-Rotting' jinx or even the 'Gender-Reversal' charm. A few days without male bits sounds like it might do the blighter a world of good. After all, he might just leave you alone if he's scared of turning into a girl.

Of course, you are likely still far too stubborn about the non-use of 'Dark Magic', so you will probably ignore my suggestion thanks to your foolish principles.

Regardless, I have better things to discuss, such as the FLAW in the boil-cure potion recipe you have sent me. Had you used the recipe you suggested, you would have been using an incorrect method, much as in those textbooks the Potions Professor burdens us with every year. Your recipe would be better off if you were doing the extra stir every five-AND-A-HALF stirs, not every FIVE stirs. It releases just a bit more oxygen, making it possible to finish the potion faster and with better coloration.

If you still think that you are at my level of intelligence though, here is another recipe, for Blood-Replenishing Potion. See if you can correct it-

Suddenly, the letter was broken by a streak of muddy, blurred wetness, through which the next several words were unable to be read. Lily tried to clean it up with a couple of simple cleaning charms, but that only threatened to tear apart the parchment. With no other choice, she let out a vehement swear, then continued to read.

...I apologize for that. Unfortunately, I am forced to deal with my own band of miscreants, Porthos, Aramis and Athos. They are three pureblooded wastrels, who have everything paid for by mummy and daddy and are likely to never do a bit of work in their life, especially their arrogant leader, Porthos. (If you are a Muggleborn as you claim to be, you should recognize the novel from which the names of these three worms springs.)

Luckily, although I might have been outnumbered, I have the intelligence to use 'Dark Magic' when the situation calls for it. I managed to hex the third member of the group, a pathetic weakling who somehow possesses a small bit of charm (Athos), then keep them occupied until a teacher arrived. Had I limited myself to only 'Light Magic' spells, then I would surely have been defeated and humiliated, much as you would have been.

On the other hand, if you were to get yourself killed, then I would be well shot of you... Perhaps it would be best for you to continue avoiding the use of 'Dark Magic' after all. If you must continue bothering me though, please at least consider the logic of having weapons to deal with criminals, much as Muggles claim to believe is the best way.

Make sure you have the recipe for the Blood-Replenishing Potion corrected by this time next week, or prepare to admit your inferiority. I would prefer to receive Chocolate Frogs as my prize should I be proven, as I suspect, the more intelligent of the two of us. I am missing 'Morgana'.

There was a series of ink-blots on the paper, then the letter continued in a cramped, hurried sort of writing. It was as if the writer were saying something he felt that he ought not to.

As for 'Fred', if you are truly so concerned about using 'Dark Magic' to deal with the fool, might I suggest the spell 'Rapsodia'. It is not Dark in nature, but it possesses the potential to be quite humiliating for the victim. To use it, it needs a wide flashing stroke of the wand, much like if one intended to cut the victim with a sword.

I will keep the effects of the spell to myself for the meantime, but trust me when I say that it would be quite hilarious to see him in action. Best of luck, annoying chit.

Sincerely,

Perseus

Lily pursed her lips as she read the last bit. She wasn't quite sure if she wanted to go so far as to resort to hexing to deal with Potter... but she had a strange feeling that Perseus might just be telling the truth. Also, she had never heard of the spell 'Rapsodia', so it was likely either a spell of Perseus' creation, Dark Magic, or something particularly obscure.

Either way, Lily wasn't sure she wanted to use it, but it would be something to keep in mind. She made a note to herself to thank Perseus for the spell if and when she used it; magic that was created by a person was frequently kept secret. She certainly remembered how Severus had tried to keep his spells secret, especially the battle spells.

Severus...apparently, she just couldn't avoid him today, not even in her most private of thoughts. 'Maybe it's because of how he keeps ignoring me,' thought the Gryffindor girl to herself with a scowl. 'I mean, sure our friendship is over and he betrayed me, but that doesn't mean that he has to act like it never happened!'

Her scowl deepening, Lily glared at the clock, before realizing with a jolt that she had almost missed dinner while pondering Perseus' letter. Quickly throwing on her robes, she rushed downstairs, hoping that perhaps in her lateness she had managed to avoid either Potter or Severus...

She wasn't successful.

As it turned out, Lily found reason to use the spell offered by the mysterious Perseus that very night. Not realizing that she had arrived in the Great Hall, Potter had gone on a long rant to his fellow Marauders, a rant that primarily consisted of him downplaying the current situation...and claiming that she had offered him the knickers off her very bum, then showed his friends a set of her laciest, white knickers as they rose to return to Gryffindor Tower.

Not knowing what to expect and more than slightly worried that she had used Dark Magic on her fellow Gryffindor, Lily was quite surprised with what the spell caused Potter to do: start dancing and burst into song. She didn't quite remember the name of the song, but given that it had Potter uncontrollably singing "I'm in love, I'm in love, I'm in love with a wonderful guy!", Lily didn't find herself minding much.

It was lucky for Potter that most of the Great Hall, including all of the Ravenclaws and Slytherins, had already emptied when he started singing the chorus. Sabrina had almost fallen over in shock though, and spent nearly half an hour trying to undo the jinx before the girl had finally found a counter. It had been bloody hilarious.

Still, Lily couldn't help but burst into a smile at the memory of Potter singing to her that he was in love with this 'wonderful guy'. He really was rather charming when he wasn't attempting to firmly lodge his foot in his mouth.

'It's a pity he's such a jerk most of the time,' mused Lily. 'If it weren't for that, he'd probably be quite a catch for some dunderhead of a girl. Shame really. Oh well, I'd best get back to my letter.'

It had been nearly a week since Perseus' letter and Lily was just now replying to it. Trying to improve upon the Blood-Replenishing Potion recipe he had sent her had proved more difficult than the girl had expected. It was only now that Lily had finally managed to improve it in a significant enough way that she felt ready to send it to the prat of a boy.

Lily found herself smirking. 'If it were anything less than perfect, he would happily rub my nose in it, but I'll bet he's never seen anything quite like this!'

Still, she pursed her lips as she wrote the letter. She had a feeling that she would need something more than merely a good recipe to get the boy to admit defeat in their little competition.

Dear Perseus,

I must thank you greatly for your spell to deal with 'Fred'. It was positively BRILLIANT! I mean, he started singing and dancing on tables, something about being 'in love with a wonderful guy'! I'll bet that half the guys in the school think that he's a bloody POUF now! Normally, I'd feel more than a bit guilty, but he REALLY deserved it this time. He said that I'd...well, it was really bad, that's for sure.

It's a shame that he's such a gigantic prat, as he's actually rather cute when he's not being a disgusting wanker. I wonder what causes people like that to be such prats... Oh well, you probably don't want to hear me talk about boys, do you?

Regardless, THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU! That was quite possibly the most hilarious thing I've ever seen, and I didn't need to use a whiff of Dark Magic either (Hint, hint)! Maybe if you used spells such as this, your problems with those 'Three Musketeers' (Of course I recognized the novel, you dunce! Still, nice comparison!) might just be a thing of the past. I mean, humiliation can be a much better motivator than pain for dealing with bullies like that...

Think about it: bullies love to embarrass people but hate it when their targets return the favor. Humiliate them badly enough and maybe they'll give up. It's worth a thought at least, don't you think?

Speaking of 'thoughts' and 'intelligence' though, I'm happy to inform you that I have improved the Blood-Replenishing Potion beyond recognition. The recipe is on the back of this sheet of parchment. As such, I have passed your challenge, and expect that you will admit that I'm just as smart as you. I would like-

"He's not going to admit it, you know."

Lily whirled around, only to see Mary reading over her shoulder as she wrote the letter to Perseus. Her eyes narrowing in outrage at her privacy being invaded, Lily replied waspishly, "Do you mind?"

Mary, seeming not to care about Lily's anger, only shrugged and leaned against one of the nearby bedposts as she spoke, "If you expect him to admit you're as smart as he is, you're probably going to be waiting a very long time."

Curious in spite of her annoyance, Lily found herself asking, "And why would that be?"

Mary only chuckled. "'Perseus' sounds like one of those proud, stubborn types, kinda like James I suppose. He'll just keep asking you to correct potions recipes until you botch one up, then use that to declare his superiority. Besides, Morgana's a pretty rare card after all..."

"You went through my stuff!" shouted the redhead, enraged once more as she realized that Mary must have been snooping through her mail. How else would she have known that he needed Morgana's Chocolate Frog Card?

"Yeah." said the brunette unconcernedly. "He sounds pretty interesting; I'd love to meet him in person...if he didn't insult me of course." Shrugging as Lily stared at her, mouth agog, she then suggested, "Perhaps you should suggest that he do a similar correction, just to prove he's your equal, you know?"

"Get out, now!" Lily shouted in response, pushing the other girl away. "And don't touch my stuff again, you little...urgh!" Giving Mary a furious glare as the girl just chuckled in amusement before returning to her own four-poster, Lily let out a small half-scream of anger, "ARRGH!"

Making a mental note to try some more advanced warding spells for the next time her too-curious roommate wanted to spy on her correspondence, Lily returned to the letter, planning to finish and send it before the other girl went snooping again. However, after a moment's thought, she paused.

As much as Lily didn't want to admit it, Mary had a good point. She could just imagine Potter or Severus pulling something like her fellow Gryffindor had described. 'It could go on forever... Maybe I'll give Mary's idea a shot, just to see if it'll work.'

Nodding, Lily continued to write:

...would like you to try a similar test, just to see if YOU are MY equal. Try the ol' Skele-Gro recipe and improve it, or admit that you are no match for ME! And I would happen to like a nice set of simple, golden earrings if I should win, so that I will be able to forever wear my reminder that 'I' am the superior Potioneer, you arrogant prat!

Still...I do thank you for the help you have given me with 'Fred'... Even if you are a moronic fool when it comes to issues of right and wrong and are a bit of a coward when it comes to your roommates...perhaps we could be friends?

In spite of how you act some of the time, you don't seem so bad.

Best Wishes,

Medusa

Nodding contentedly, Lily grabbed the letter in both hands, gave one last glare over at Mary, then left her bedroom to head off to the owlery. Luckily, she was able to avoid Potter, who was on a bit of a warpath in regards to her, not having quite forgiven her for the 'Singing Fool' hex as people had taken to calling it.

However, embarrassed people have a tendency to do rather stupid things, and Potter was no exception...