CHAPTER 15

Next morning I heard my sister-in-law coming, but I had no energy to get out of my room. I didn't want to see him, or anybody at that. I only prayed and prayed, crying quietly and bitterly. There was a tiny voice in my head saying, "What if he really came to get the cable?", and so I asked God for a sign. I told God that if John came to my room with intentions to rape me, then I prayed for something to happen to him before the sun rose the next morning.

Later that night, he got busted for not carrying his driver's license. That was it for me. I lived with the devil. How can a brother think of raping his sister? Was it because he knew nobody would believe me? Was it because he knew he'd get away with it? Was that his definition of power? 

I called my mom when he left home the next day because I needed to speak to someone before I died of pressure and heart attack. I remember standing by the window watching, just in case he came back.

"WHAT?", my mom yelled in panic, "He tried to rape you?!",

"Yes.", I whispered, and whimpered, "I'm not at peace, mom. I'm horrified.".

My mom's face wore so much pain. My mom is a light skinned woman. So I witnessed her face turn red.

"Being a woman doesn't have to be this hard.", she said, her voice breaking.

She knew I knew nobody in the US, which meant I had nowhere to go. She told me later on that she wished she could fly just so she could hug me. 

"What kind of evil is this?". My mom cried, I cried. 

I asked God to send me anywhere. I used to lock my door and put a chair in front of it, just in case. Moreover, I slept with a knife under my pillow, also, just in case. My mom talked to my dad about what happened and my dad, being my best friend, called one of his friends he helped years back. She was a woman living in Maryland. Dad didn't tell her what happened. He just asked her for help. Luckily, she was looking for a caregiver for her old client. My dad gave her a go-ahead.

...

The lady called John and explained to him that she needed someone for a job, and if I'm available, I should go. I think he expected me to refuse the offer since university was opening in a few days.

"I'll go.", I replied, shocking him.

"University opens in a few days _",

"I'm not going to attend. I'm dropping out of college. I'm taking that job.",

He scoffed, "I thought you'd be a grown up by now. You still think like a child.".

"It's my life.".

He had noticed how cold I've become. What surprised me was his lack of shame and guilt.

"Let me ask you; what were you doing in my room that night?", I asked him again.

"What night?", he played dumb.

"Friday night, at 2 am.",

"Oh, I told you that I came to take the cable.",

"That time of the night?",

"Oh my God!", he got angry, "What do you think I came to do there? You think I wanted to rape you or something?",

Ah, this son of a bitch.

"If I'm horny I can get any girl I want. Do you know how many strip clubs there are in Chicago? I'm not that cheap.", he argued, angrily, "Did you say something to people back home? No wonder dad sent me a very ambiguous text yesterday. You're being a child. When are you ever going to grow up?",

Motherfucker, shut up. He said more than enough. I already got my answer. I reached the conclusion that he was not my problem anymore. I was leaving, and that was final. 

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