Set 313

What's the speed limit of sex?

68 at 69 you have to turn around.

What's the ultimate rejection?

When you're masturbating and your hand falls asleep.

What did the egg say to the boiling water?

"How can you expect me to get hard so fast? I just got laid a minute ago."

What is it when a man talks dirty to a woman?

Sexual harassment.

What are the two greatest lies?

"The check is in the mail," and "I promise I won't cum in your mouth."

What are three words you dread the most while making love?

"Honey, I'm home."

What's the definition of trust?

Two cannibals giving each other a blowjob.

Why is it called a Wonder Bra?

When she takes it off, you wonder where her tits went.

Why don't women blink during foreplay?

They don't have time.

Why does it take a million sperm to fertilize one egg?

Coz they don't stop for directions.

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At a local college dance, a guy from America asked the girl from Sweden to dance.

While they were dancing, he gives her a little squeeze, and says, "In America, we call this a hug". She replies, "Yaah, in Sveden, we call it a hug too."

A little later, he gives her a peck on the cheek, and says, "In America, we call this a kiss". She replies, "Yaah, in Sveden, we call it a kiss too."

Towards the end of the night, and a lot of drinks later, he takes her out on the campus lawn, and proceeds to have sex with her, and says, "In America, we call this a grass sandwich".

She says, "Yaaah in Sveden, we call it a grass sandwich too, but we usually put more meat in it."