First born

"I do not know what you speak of, Peaches. You are insane if you think I am lady whistledown. I should not have the means nor the resources. You are not thinking clearly because you are upset and you must not throw around accusations-"

"You have said not a word and now you are becoming defensive. You are lady whistledown. You have ruined me, you have ruined Benedict and Colin and Marina. You are the only one who shall have had access to all of this information. And it is such a coincidence that on the very night that we argued, she has decided she shall report on us? Two people she had never even mentioned? If you are not her then you are at least an informant." I can feel my cheeks burning red as I wipe the tears from my cheeks. I am no longer upset, I am angry. Angry that my sister could do this to me. This is no mere tit for tat argument any longer, she has ruined me and she does not even seem to recognise that. She does not even seem to care. This is not at all how my sister would usually act when she could see I was upset. "I beg you, Pen. Whether it is you or whether you work for her... I beg of you. Find a way to make this right. I know I may have upset you and perhaps I was harsh but you must. This shall ruin me and more importantly, it shall ruin him. I beg of you."

"I know not of what you speak." She says only these words before she insists on closing the door on my face.

From there, I know I must speak with Benedict. So, I rush to the bridgerton house and I knock on the door, to be greeted by Anthony. He is about the last person I wish to be greeted by in my current state. "Anthony, please allow me to see him. I wish only to speak with him about what has been said, about what we must do of it-"

"You shall not come in here. You most certainly will not speak with Benedict. I am afraid I must ask you to leave." I place my arm in the way as he begins to shut the door, so that he may not without hurting me. Although I would not put it past him, he does not slam the door on my forearm, rather regarding me with narrowed eyes. "I have told you to leave and so you shall leave."

"Let me speak with him."

"No. Do you not listen? Did your mother never teach you manners? Everything I told Benedict of you is true. You and your family are not past trapping a young man into a pregnancy he did not cause, why am I to believe that you are different? That you are not also attempting the same, that you do not cavort with other gentlemen as lady whistledown suggests? I cannot allow you to marry my brother, not with your reputation or the tarnished one your family now carries. You must return to your home and you must not attempt to contact Benedict again. That is not a request, Peaches. You must do it."

"None of it is true though!" I shriek, shaking my head and sniffling, a sudden strike of rain beginning to fall. "Well... some of it is. My family have done that to Colin and I regret not telling Benedict sooner so that you might have stopped it but I cannot change the past. I have never had marital relations with anyone other than your brother and I do not wish to! I go to Lord Granville's only to paint and practice with the much larger array of colours that he has. Benedict has done whatever he wants but I have not. I am still a good young lady and I have a dowry, I am a lady, I have... I... I love him. Please, if you do not forgive me then at least think of it for his sake. I am in love with him. Nothing is the same when I am away from him, the world is colder and lonelier and... he fills my days with happiness and even the promise of catching a glimpse of him from my window makes my heart leap with joy. I have not pulled at tricks as Marina has, and as I stated previously, I am sorry she did that. Just... please allow me to see him. To speak with him. I beg of you." My tears mingle with the rain as I hold my shoulders, shivering slightly. I hope that my words and my clearly pathetic nature will hope to sway the stone cold heart of the first born bridgerton.

Alas, I am wrong. He steps into the house ever so slightly to shield himself from the rain but refrains from allowing me entrance, continuing to block the door. "No. You speak extremely eloquently, the words you say are beautiful, yes. But they do not change my mind. You will not marry him and I will carry on doing whatever is in my power to ensure you do not."

"Why?!"

"How can you ask me that?" He grits his teeth. "Have you read the latest edition of lady whistledown, Miss Peaches? You are disgraced. Your entire family are disgraced. You are a fool if you should think I shall allow Benedict to marry into that mess." Anthony scowls, pushing my arm from the gap in the door and marches back into the house.

I retreat, but only because the thin layer that my dress provides shall not withstand the force of the cold and the rain. This is not the end, though, and Anthony can count on that.

I am in my room when I hear a gentle knock against my window. I rise from my bed, gazing out the back window as I see our garden, and when I look closer, I see Benedict. He is stood directly in the centre of our carefully conserved flower bed with small pebbles in his hands, as he throws them so they may tap my window and gain my attention. "You have broken into our garden? I am impressed, you have become a criminal for me."

"I prefer romantic. Will you come down here so that we may speak?"

"I shall catch my death! Are you not aware of the weather?"

"Well then." He grins. "I shall have to come up to you."