Bittersweet

Lily's POV

"Good morning. How are you feeling Ms. Lily? I see you're doing great according to your vitals." Dr. Grey made sure to paint the best smile he could to lighten up the day.

"Can you stop trying so hard Dr. I've spent my whole life in this hospital I'm pretty sure a nurse myself. I can understand my vitals are beyond saving." I took a pause to breathe in and continued, "If there's anything that needs saving, then it's your lying skills"

And this time, he chuckled. It came out naturally "I'm proud of you. I really am"

I gave him a soft smile that of course, didn't reach my eyes which he noticed and was helpless. I turned towards the window which was still screened. "How's the weather, doc?"

"Take a look, dear" he said as he made his way to the window and pulling the curtains to the either sides.

The sun rays hit my face. I inhaled a deep breath. The sunrise on New York is such a great sight. Especially from my room, which is like a penthouse, all thanks to Mason for choosing this one for me. The buildings stood incredibly high. The windows reflected the rays into random directions. The clouds were like soft orange cotton candies moving lazily. I could here a non-existent chiming tune. It's just my mind playing games with me.

"How many more, doc?" I broke the silence, still locking my eyes on the view.

"What, dear?" His smile faded away as he asked in confusion.

"Days" I said tearing my gaze from outside the window, and directly looking into his. "Till I bid my last goodbyes to…."

"A month! 28 precisely." He snapped. His eyes were brimming with regret. He couldn't bear the thought of goodbyes I guess.

"So cruel, doc" I sighed in mockery.

"Don't lose hopes, Lily. There are still chances…"

"Stop it, Dr. Grey. We both know whatever you're about to say makes no damn sense at all. I know, okay? I really do. There's no*chance*unless there's some parallel world or something which could teleport me from here and ultimately save me" I paused and giggled at how my novel addiction became a reference when I'm actually trying to be sensible. "Well, anyway doc. I'm okay with whatever the universe throws at me. I've accepted my defeat. I've submitted to my reality."

"If there's anything you want from the bottom of your heart and are honest about it, then the whole universe will work to give it to you" he stated as a response to my little outburst.

I just stared at him blankly taking in whatever he just said. I then plopped back on the bed, made myself comfortable and closed my eyes. "Please close the curtains before you go doc. I'd like to sleep for a couple of more hours"

"Sure! Call for a nurse to inform me if you need anything or feel uneasy".

I nodded.

———————————————

I felt someone moving around, but my eyes didn't like the idea of opening at all. Then I felt a hand run through my baby hairs that were tickling my face. This time I jolted up, fully escaping my sleep only to meet a pair of sparkling icy blue eyes softly gazing at mine.

I slowly sat up, my eyes still locked to his with confusion. "Gavin" I whispered acknowledging his presence.

He noticed how my voice was reduced to a whisper and handed me over a glass of water to lubricate my throat. And I gulped the whole of it in a single go as I was actually, desperately needed it. I gave it back to him, once I was done.

Gavin is an intern at this hospital. He started working here about three months ago. With that being said, I'm not sure about how he's doing at his duties, but he instantly captured all the females from patients to doctors to interns to surgeons to receptionist and every other female ghost's hearts effortlessly with his unreal beauty, perfect charm and kind personality. He never goes unnoticed. With all his godly characters, a Greek god body, his shoulder muscles were always at a war with his white coat to show its presence, his turtleneck ash shirt hugging him like a second skin paired with dark denim jeans made him look professional and casual at a time. Oh and before I forget, did I mention his black metal spectacles? They did a better work than any fancy jewel could ever do in a lifetime. It actually gave a chef's kiss to his whole look. His icy blue eyes were captivating. His long hairs, here I mean not too long, Just the perfect length enough to dance along his fingers whenever he runs it through them, were jet black. Like blacker than black itself.

Overall, he stood like that one chocolate-lava cake for women's eyes to drool over, regardless of their age or professional status.

But this god of a guy had his eyes on me ever since we first met when he was incharge of me for the second week of previous month. What surprises me is that, this guy is fully aware of my health and I can no longer live, at all, asked me out last week out of the blue. Yes. He has feelings for me. I tried pushing him away saying it was just his pity. But he was so damn sure about it. He reassured me that what he felt was beyond it and even went on his knees for my permission to allow him prove it to me.

I just can't accept it because of me. No doubt. Just look at me. What makes me worthy of his or anybody else's love? Death is gonna embrace me anytime soon. It would be beyond selfish of me to let him into this pathetic fate that's swallowing me.

"Where are you lost ?" He snapped me out of my thoughts with his soft husky voice

"Hmm?….Nothing at all" I shrugged. "What are you doing here anyway? I mean, you're no more incharge of me, are you?"

"I'm always incharge of the one who's incharge of my heart" he winked.

He managed to put a smile on me effortlessly. "That was a smooth delivery"

"That's only for you, love" he leaned closer and cupped my face with his warm hands. I felt the feeling of being saved. My heartbeat DIDN'T increase, I didn't feel my body tense up or I didn't even freeze. Warm. It was warm. It felt like I was back home.