chapter no 2

it is both blessing and a curse to feel everything so very deeply 

Ivan's POV

Sitting on the chair across the table leaning back on the headrest I sipped from my cup while my mind keep going back to yesterday evening, there was a strong desire to go and see her and ask her, if she was okay or not to which I already knew the answer probably she wasn't.

taking the last sip from the cup of coffee in my hand while waiting for my shift to start I was lost in my deep thoughts I heard a knock on my chambers door and then got clicked open revealing Micheal who was looking the same he used to look as we will never know when he's happy and sad because he always has the same stone look on his face.

I shrugged and gestured for him to sit on the wooden chair across the table side by side. As he did I leaned forward on my hands placing them on the table and resting my chin on my hands. Facing him while being drowned in my weird thoughts. A while passed and we both kept silent neither he said anything nor I was in my right mind to say anything.

"Ivan" he called out breaking the silence while sighing and leaning onto the brown huge table placed between us.

"You look lost...I'm sitting here for the last 30 minutes but you pretending that I'm not even here" he made an annoyed face when I came back to my consciousness.

"There's a girl," I said directly not considering the lecture he gave me a second ago. While I faced him with my whole senses. And my mind keeps picturing Isabel from the evening when she was sleeping.

"So you like her" he sipped the cup and said with the same stone face he had when he came here. While I just sighed at his statement I think it was more than liking her though.

"No bro for god sake" I breathed and relaxed in my chair putting my head on the headrest of the soft chair and facing the ceiling. Micheal released a stressful sigh which was enough loud to be heard

"So what's the matter if it's not love kinda thing," he said shrugging his shoulder and gasturing his hands in strange manner.

"Is she from the hospital or from somewhere else" he added. And took another sip.

"She is my patient who got admitted yesterday" Michael snapped his head toward me while giving me a 'what do you mean' look.

"Her case is similar to Amara's case," I said while his expression changed from stone to sad at the mention of Amara. I remember how close they were to each other but with time those beautiful events become part of us and then a mare memory.

"Sooooo....." he said sadly. "What are you thinking?" He added.

"Of course, I will help her by being her doctor," I said calmly. And made up my mind to help her in any way and relive the time I spent with Amara when she was sick.

"So what's disturbing you" he took his last sip and placed his mug beside mine like a couple sitting together. He was right what was bothering me was her case similarities or her existence I shrugged my weird thoughts and especially that last one.

"Amara's case was simple...like she was having cancer but we didn't know and she was in the last stage to which made it more complex and zero chances for her survival" I explained. And Michael just stared at me with those small sad eyes. Must be thinking the same as I'm doing.

"She doesn't have cancer but still there is no chance of her survival if the attack happened again, as you know Amara's asthma was gone when she had cancer means she died because of cancer, not asthma," I explained further while Micheal curiosity increased.

"But the initiative was asthma Amara no doubt didn't die because of asthma but the base was asthma and there is a condition like if the attack happened again." He said putting appoint in front of me.

"So you mean maybe her asthma change into cancer later," I asked.

He nodded briefly and shrugged his shoulder again. I don't know what's happening but I will help her at any cost as I wasn't able to do that for Amara. I lost her and suffered a lot and I don't want anyone else to suffer the same way I felt after her, Isabel's family will suffer the same way. I thought to myself. Although I wasn't on any brief point I still thought to tell her father as soon as possible so they also know about her condition worst or good. I took a long sigh and ran my hands through my dark black hair in frustration.

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Isabel's POV

The following night went by and another day came. I opened my eyes to see my mother sleeping on the couch, rayn and dad left yesterday night as they were not allowed to stay in the hospital except for one person. I don't know why the doctor even in the first place admitted me as I was used to it but I never got admitted for such reasons. Although they know better than us there might be something serious.

I stared at the ceiling as my vision was still blurry being under a high dose of medicines I diverted my gaze towards my mom's sleeping visage who opened her eyes slowly and wiggled her orbs to get rid of sleepiness in her eyes while first thing she did was looking at me. When she found me already staring at her she smiled warmly and got up from the small brown leather couch. And came towards me gently caressed my face and sat down beside me in a little space on the hospital bed.

"How are you feeling" she breathed, kissing my forehead and retreating her posture.

"mom..." I winced, while my mother chuckled a little. It's been the 100th time since she asked me if I'm okay.

"I'm good I promise" I announced reassuring her.

"I'm happy that you are all right". I looked up at her and saw her glistening eyes while sitting on the bed I hugged her to calm her down I wonder how scared she was to lose me I reassured her so many times but she is not believing me.

I hugged her for a while then pulled back as the door got clicked open and a manly figure walked in with a stethoscope wrapped around his neck while his dark black hair fell onto his forehead and wearing a white gown beneath a blue typical doctor's clothes.

He was all absorbed by the convo he was having with the nurse that followed him. The nurse forwarded the notepad to him and he willingly took it while I bluntly stared at him, his jaw was sharper than a knife while his lips turned into hearts as he smiled at the nurse. the nurse's heart probably got fluttered as her cheeks flushed red.

He came towards me and my mom raised from her place and stood beside the bed giving space to the doctor. the nurse left the moment she gave him the notepad. While he stood 2 steps away from me smiling down at me. My hurt jumped wildly and I felt like it might come out of its place. I can bet my cheeks probably turned red till now. Now I can understand the nurse and what she went through.

"So Isabel how are you feeling?" he smiled turning his lips into a heart-like shape. While unknowing a nervousness ran through my body. My name slipped from his mouth so smoothly that I would like to listen if he calls it a million times.

"I'm feeling good doctor....hmm," I said. "Hmm, I don't know your name" I announced. While a smile crept across his face. I bit my lower lip and diverted my gaze toward my mom who was so done with my answer and gave me a 'what with his name' type look. And I don't even know by myself why in the first place I asked him about his name.

"Ohh, I'm sorry I forget it's our first meeting," he said enthusiastically. While I found his personality attractive and joyful it would be better if he's called....ummm... I was pulled out of my thought when I heard his deep yet melodious voice reach to my ears "My name is Ivan...ivan covey. he added.

"Ohh," I breathed making an o face. While he nodded his head and plugged his stethoscope in his years and gestured for me to sit completely as I was leaning back on the cushion before. He approached me and placed the round metal-like disk on my upper chest.

"Please take long breaths, Isabel," he said sternly looking passionate with his work observed quietly and all concentrated on his action. he removed the diaphragm and put it on my upper back, and told me to do the same again. I breathed again and his expression change a little which was of complete distress I looked at my mother and her expression also changed.

I ignored,he retreated his posture and pulled a blue pan out of the pocket of his gown and wrote something briefly on the sheet and then diverted his visage towards my mom whose expression was all stressed up although she didn't say anything.

"Mrs.parker it would be better if I get to talk to your husband or son." He declared while my mom frowned and stood on her left leg putting all the weight on it. My heartbeat unknowingly started beating fastly as the mare thought of what may be wrong entered my mind as my throat went dry.

"It's ok doctor if you talk to me" she protested. And shifted her weight again on her second leg uncomfortably. I sensed her worry-lacing sound as she spoke.

"I'm sorry but I want to talk to a man" Ivan breathed out apologetically while I just stared at them like a lost puppy.

"But...." my mom again tried to convince him but I cut her off. "mom there must be a reason he's not willing to talk to you, it's okay let dad come here then he'll talk to him and you'll know anyways at the end" I explained while she relaxed for a while.

I diverted my gaze toward the ivan and smiled warmly reassuring him while he smiled back widely nodding.

"Thank you, Isabel you are very understanding," he said politely and nodded toward my mom again.

"Now I'll take my leave and Mrs. Parker I assure you there's nothing to be worried about." He assured her and turned on his feet while my mom relaxed. The doctor was very polite and kind, which I liked in the first place. And I finally remember what reflects his personality the most 'sunshine' this is what came to my mind. Even though there was so much on my mind but still I successfully gave him a name that accurately suits him. I think the journey would be going to be long with this dark haired doctor.

I looked at my mom, took her hand in mine, and squeezed it a little, confirming that everything would be fine whereas I was dying inside just thinking about what he might talk to my father or rayn . But whatever he's going to say, it would be my fate and I have to accept it. Although we don't know how much time we have in this world neither we are anyone to decide it.

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