Naruto's Twin sister Hina

Up till now it is great. I love it. I hope it will continue to be great in the future. Character development is good. At first few chapter are short but as chapter increases its length also increases great.

You really really need a good translator or an editor Your grammar sucks tbh but the idea of your story is great and I guess its good if this is your first fic . Don't be in a hurry to post your chapters . Take time but at least post it with as less mistakes as possible .

I really love the story until now and the idea of making a younger sister for Naruto is very good and we can see thats it help Naruto and until now the story follow the mai story witH just the addition of Hina in the story.

this is the greatest fanfic ever more should come author thanks for the good work [img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update]

My man yogi...you got a great imagination and story writing skills.....really good one....we must create a chess manga.i am looking forward to that

The beginning of fanfiction interesting😊! But I would like more descriptions and dialogues... I hope this improves over time🙃. There are few chapters, so it is still difficult to judge the main character🌸.

The grammar and spelling have a few mistakes but overall still 👌👌 [img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp]

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Really good read with some minor language problems........ .. ................. .. ..... ......................................................

There is no system at all and some stuff just feel hum weird? not sure how to explain it ---------------------------------------------------

Writing Quality: 5. I enjoyed it for the most part Update Stability: 1. Hasn’t been uploaded in 2 months. Story Development: 3. It was alright until she became a male, all novels are great if they stick to the script, if you make a nonhuman mc, don’t think about human forms. If you make a female mc, don’t turn her into a male. Novels that do that go to a special place in the deep bowels of the fiery underworld. Character Design: 2. She wanted a male form, that little dumb idea dropped it to 3 stars but the fact that she’s somewhat op and acts so different than what a normal person would in this situation(both reincarnation and average Konoha civilian) just drops it down a star since she isn’t at all a good mc, kinda like a Mary Sue but she is also somehow an idiot which now that I think about it is pretty typical for characters of that type. World Background: 5. What can I say, it’s just Naruto. I was gonna give it a 1 since the author didn’t do much else to make the world an interesting thing, if you’ve seen the show then all you gotta add is 1 person to it and strap a few plot points, give her a power of your choice, and then sit back as she does the work for you. So either 5 or 1. Overall: 3.2

Tampilkan spoiler

The idea is interesting, but there is not much development in the plot, it moves very fast and without obstacles, there are no ups and downs in the story to bring emotion, it is basically a straight line without much emotion in the story, for me this fan-fic is more like a '' wish fulfillment '' than a fan-fic focused on a new story inside naruto with the addition of his sister, but anyway, it's not a bad idea, just written in an amateur way, it doesn't mean that is bad.