Regrettably, My Student has Money Troubles (3.3)

…

Sitting in the venerated Twilight House, the home of the Loki Familia, I felt underwhelmed. For a castle that housed the most prominent guild in Orario, it was… homier that I expected. There were rugs abound, pictures, and many light crystals. The windows looked out onto carefully maintained gardens and fountains. Given the intimidating visage that the structure had, I was more than slightly disappointed by the lack of torches, sinister suits of armor, and ominous paintings. Perhaps I've been spoiled by dozens of games that featured the invasion of intimidating castles, but Twilight House most certainly did not live up to its reputation.

I'd pegged the Loki Familia as some sort of secret final boss. Now, it seems highly probable that they're just part of a Slice of Life theme that the author must have going on in the background. With Bell Cranel living in a ruined Church, and Wallenstein living in a mansion, I had to admit that the contrast was actually rather well-thought out. It seems that Zaimokuza managed to pay attention to first year Literature classes. Good for him.

Still, damn this Light Novel setting, ruining perfectly good, sinister castles.

"Your dour gaze angers me, Hikigaya." A female's voice, cold and measured, chilled me to my bones. Though I turned my gaze towards its source, I already knew who it came from. Emerald eyes greeted me with a glare, lengthened ears twitched, and viridian brows narrowed. "Perhaps, you can turn your fetid gaze elsewhere? Or, might I advocate that you find a healer to excise those eyes of yours? I assure you that you'll be better for it."

"Only if you get that tongue of yours checked, Alf." I shot back my own greeting and walked towards the Elven princess. For a moment, my verbal opponent seemed confused, and I knew that I had found a weak spot that I did not previously know of. Haha! This day isn't an entire write-off, it seems! As I reached her side, I gazed upon her over my shoulder and gave the rest of my rebuke with a drawl. "It seems to quite easily spout unfounded rumors and salacious lies. May I recommend a butcher to deal with it for you?"

"Hypocrisy on your part, Hikigaya." Alf gave a huff and began to walk. I followed since I was sure that the Elven Princess wouldn't have contacted me without good reason. What other reason could the viridian-haired elf in my presence have besides guiding me to where I needed to be? The perils of being at the very top of a Familia meant one needed to keep appearances. That meant sending respectable people to guide one's guests around. Obviously, Loki is thankful towards me for saving Viridis. "If a particular appendage needed to be cut from the body for lying, then I have no doubt you'd be made mincemeat of."

"Well, Alf-ojou-sama, I am but a mere Level 1 of a different Familia. Of course, I would spout lie after lie about my abilities." Continuing my drawl, I couldn't help but feel more relaxed as we continued to banter. After the incident, we were quickly found by the rest of Loki's Familia and ushered into Twilight House. Like many, other rational people, I'm less than happy when I'm forced to go somewhere I did not wish to go. "When questioned by a terrifyingly inquisitive, hopeless, and strange elf who chose to follow them out of anger about being outbid over a spell, any Level 1 would lie through their teeth."

"S-such fallacies! You had extended an invitation towards me to-!" Alf cut herself off as she realized that I had pressed my advantage and surprised her utterly. I had, as the Elven Princess said, invited her along to prove that I could cast the spell that I had outbid her on. Needless to say, she had been less than pleased to find that I was able to do so, and the rest is history. Still, my attack worked, and I had thrown the viridian-haired elf's composure aside. Ha! The playing field has been leveled! Prepare yourself, Alf-chan~. "Trickster! You very well recall the nature of our initial meeting, scoundrel!"

"My, my, already resorting to one-word insults, Ojou-chan? Is this all that can be expected of Royal Blood?" I pressed my advantage, gazing upon Alf reproachfully for added effect. The Elven Princess flushed scarlet with anger and reeled back. Sophistry is my blood and hypocrisy my body! You cannot hope to defeat me! This is my realm! Unlimited Insult Works! "Did you have Royal Tutors teach you how to properly insult the peasantry??"

"Do not trifle with me!" Alf growled, actually turning to face me entirely. We'd stopped walking a moment ago, but I was too entertained to point it out or take stock of our surroundings. We were in the Elven Princess's home so I had no reason to search for threats. The viridian-haired elf switched her staff to her lesser hand and began to press against me with the finger of her dominant one. "I'll have you know that I received the very best education! The fact alone that it did not cover you only lends credence to the fact that they were the very best tutors I could have possibly had!"

"Oh, I'm afraid I didn't bring my pedigree today, Alf-sama! Please forgive me for not bringing in the credentials of all my tutors!"

"Hikigaya, you are a vile, horrible, unpleasant, and-."

"Oh? You have a list of words to just describe me? It must've taken a while to make. I'm flattered, Ojou-chan~."

"!"

With a wordless cry, the Level 6 launched herself at me.

Needless to say, I was surprised, and because of that surprise I was caught flatfooted and fell backwards with the elf atop me.

Was this how I was to die? By an enraged elf?

Wait, now that I thought about it, the only thing strange about this is the fact that it's Alf. I'd have imagined that Lyon would be the one doing the strangling.

Holding me down, with a smile that reminded me too much of Hiratsuka-sensei than I would've liked, Alf reached for my mask with one hand, reared back the other, and-.

The door Alf stopped us before suddenly opened, and a red-haired, scantily-clad, and underdeveloped missile struck Riveria.

"NOOOO! I won't allow it! My Riveria-chan isn't ever going to leave me!" With that cry upon her lips, Loki then began to mash her cheek against Alf's cheek. Huh. This is quite different from what I'd imagined having two girls on top of me would be like. NO! Away with you, vile thoughts! "Isn't that right, Riveria-chan!? Please, tell me that you're never going to leave me for a man, Riveria-channnnn!"

Alf's features went pale, her head turned slowly past the doorframe. Upon witnessing what was within, the elven princess's face turned into shade after shade of red.

"Riveria-chaaannnn, don't ever leave Loki-sama okay? Pleaseeeee!"

Curious, I followed her gaze.

"Riveria-chan, I remember meeting you just when you were a little kid! I don't ever want to lose you!"

Ever so slowly, I felt a smile crawl upon my masked face.

"I remember first meeting Riveria-chaaaannn just seven decades ago!"

There were a good dozen people within the room. Wallenstein and Cranel were both present and both stared upon us with confusion. The Hiryutes and Viridis all sported astonished gazes. Landrock Gareth and Deimne Finn shared small smiles.

"You were so adorable and cute, Riveria-chan!"

I turned my head back up, towards Alf.

"You were shorter than me and you loved wearing shorts!" The Elven princess's entire face was scarlet, all the way to the tips of her ears. The viridian-haired elf's legs began to shake around me. The slightest, most utterly adorable whine began to emit from her pursed lips. Emerald eyes glistened in the Mage Light.

"You even stole mine once!"

I could do it.

"I still have them, Riveria-chaaannnn!"

I can topple the castle known as Ljos Alf Riveria completely.

"Riveria-chan." Catching her attention with a whisper, I met her near-broken gaze. Then, I uttered the words that I knew would lead to my complete victory. "Everyone heard… everything."

The effect of my words was instantaneous.

A swift offhand backhand knocked Loki out completely.

Alf stood up, brushed down her dress, and… fled. The Elven Princess did not simply walk away from the meeting where she should've been present. The viridian-haired elf did not run away from a Level 1 and her knocked-out god.

No, Riveria Ljos Alf, sprinted as fast as her legs could take her out of sight.

On the ground, harassed to hell and back, I basked in the greatest victory I'd ever achieved while splayed against the cool, castle floor next to an unconscious god.

Feels good.

…

Unfortunately, all things must come to an end. Loki was swiftly awakened and I was pulled into the meeting by the two Amazons while the rest looked on in either confusion or amusement. Oi, can't a guy have some time to luxuriate in completely and utterly teasing an elven princess into fleeing? Truly, I would like some time alone to fully process my achievement.

My requests were unheeded. I found myself seated near the doorframe, to the left of Tiona Hiryute. The Amazon Tomboy seemed displeased with sitting still. She squirmed in her seat incessantly, even though her elder sibling glared at her often.

"With those shenanigans over with, and Finn-kun working on getting Riveria-chan out of her room, let our investigation on this recent attack commence!" Loki sat behind a rather nice desk with her hands steepled before her. The underdeveloped goddess might have been intimidating, if not for the bruise on her cheek from the blow that laid her low. "Let this Familia meeting formally begin!"

"Eh, what about Sensei and I? We're both not part of the Loki Familia." Cranel blinked and then flushed at the silence that followed his words. My student, why must you ruin my mood so quickly? Please consider the situation before speaking. "Er… sorry… I haven't done anything like this before."

"Hestia's doing something with Hephaestus." Loki waved aside Cranel's question before leveling her gaze upon me. "And, Hikigaya's god is famous for never showing up, isn't that right?"

I gave a noncommittal shrug, answering would simply be too risky, better to let everyone just assume what they believed is correct.

"That aside." Loki cleared her throat, gathering the attention of all those present. The ponytailed goddess gestured towards Landrock, before resting her chin upon her hands. This is getting more ominous than I liked. Zaimokuza, bring back the slapstick comedy, please. "We have a problem."

"Yes, as Loki-sama said, the situation is more dire than expected." Landrock rose and walked until he stood at Loki's side. The dwarf's voice was deep and sonorous. He produced a small ledger from a drawer within the desk. "The only possibility in which such a coordinated attack could've taken place upon the Loki Familia… is if someone within the Familia informed the party responsible." The legendary dwarf gazed towards each one of us in turn. "The only ones who are exempt from suspicion are Finn, Riveria, Bete Loga and everyone in this room."

"So! Cranel-kun and Hikigaya-kun!" Loki called upon me and my student as the members of her Familia shuffled uneasily. Presumably, they did not like the thought of having a traitor in their Familia. The smile upon the goddess's face was snake-like and sent shivers down my spine. Looking at Cranel, he seemed barely capable of withholding a scream. Gone was the affable trickster, and what was left was a god whose children had been attacked. A terrible being to make enemies of. And, yet, was there anything that this god had that I wanted? "Would you care to help us out in this little matter? I can make it worth your time."

Naturally, I refused.

...

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