Day 10 "Gratitude, Ideas & Regret"

Thank you for the comment. I'm so happy! I'll try to catch up to my missed days!

Because of you I actually had some ideas. Sometimes ideas can come at random times I tell you. Oh the nights I used to get scolded because I was still awake writing my ideas haha!

It's frustrating because I might forget them so I had to write them down immediately. So when it happens during the night I get scolded because I needed to go to sleep and I'm not doing what they say.

"Go to bed!"

"Mhm. Later."

"You need to go to bed now."

"But the ideas...."

"You can write them tomorrow. Go to bed."

"Bu-wh-haaaaaaaa.....okay..."

And during the conversation I'm writing haha!

It's really hard for me to explain back then that I might forget them while trying not to forget them while writing while listening...pfffffttttt.

I'd get so upset and try to remember them like a mantra while I close my eyes.

It's either that or I secretly/not secretly continue to write while still being upset.

Hold on let me just get a snack or something.

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Just got some biscuits.

And I noticed the half moons on my nails are getting smaller. And I'm wondering if others also have them or not.

As for the ideas...well, I think I've forgotten some of them hahahaha.

I wanted to roleplay some fluffy kl*nce. Then considered if I could use the plot for a novel.

It's just a draft for now.

And for now it'll do.

And I just randomly thought I wanted a haircut.

Anyway the draft of the summary goes something like...

After dropping out of school, [?] started to help around [?] 's big brother's bakery. As the months passed by [?] still doesn't know what [?] will do in life and [?]'s big brother kept worrying about [?]'s mental health. Until one day an opportunity presents itself in the form of an invitation letter. It was an invitation from the palace to attend [??]'s 18th birthday. And [?]'s big brother together with his fiancé were very convincing and [?] ended up agreeing to go to the event. To make some friends.

Eventually mc will meet people and fell in love.

We'll work on that.

And I'll find more snacks or something. It's been a lot of thinking.

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I ate dinner twice....

Wanted to appease grandmother so I ate again....

Slightly regretting it.

I just didn't want to argue.

Her motto during meal times is 'If I didn't see you eat, you didn't eat. If I don't remember you eating, you didn't eat.' Something like that.

On one hand, it's nice to be invited to the dinner table and eat together. On the other hand, if you've eaten, either eat again and suffer in silence or prepare to engage in battle of words and patience. If the latter happens, just know there's still a chance of you eating again. To win you have to be calm and respond wisely in your favor.

Though the calm part usually gets thrown out the window in the first 5-10 seconds. And you might not respond in the way you want. Nonetheless, keep persevering. It's your stomach after all.

Sometimes I win. Sometimes I lose. Sometimes it's something in-between.

They say the regret comes later. True.

And I think I regretted it way before too.

While picking up the plate. Taking some food. And eating them. The bigger regret comes after when I'm full and have to deal with trying to breathe and distract myself while not talking as much as possible. Remember when you find it hard to breathe on a very full stomach compared to when you've just eaten enough? Yeah that.

So please, if you don't want to experience such a thing. Don't force yourself to eat when you're already full. Unless it's a special case. Which I do not know.

Anyway, I guess we'll leave it at that and read something or watch some videos.

Until the next chapter!

Bye~