Chapter 9: AMENDMENTS

One hell of a month ,full of my painful cry and unknown agony. Having to deal with my pain silently was torture because every morning I woke up beside the pain and laid to sleep besides it.

I couldn't get myself to tell anyone about Ian.In the first place ,mum wouldn't believe me.She could think it's because I disliked him.

Every single minute with him, next to him felt like a whole hour of suffocation, it was unbearable but I wasn't willing to see the whole s** video place me on the #trend 1.

One fine morning after breakfast there was a knock at the door. I was in the room but Ian was downstairs so he opened the door.

" Hello, is anyone at home ," a soft voice asked .It seemed so familiar.

I heard him ask " Yes, how may I help you?"

" Ummmh, I am Robs Tutor," she said . I was so happy she was back .He let her in and began to call me .I didn't answer but instead I walked out of my room with my books. You could notice that smile on my miserable face. For once in a very long time I was legitimately smiling,it wasn't faked.

As I placed my books on the table I asked her where she had disappeared to without any word. I didn't even greet her .

" Good morning too , and I've been doing not so great ,"she said.

That was an answer to the question good morning and how have you been which I clearly didn't ask .

I apologized for not greeting her " ok, am Sorry. But where have you been ?" I said as I sat.

She said" am sorry I left without notice , but I went back to my home town ,my mother had just passed. "

" Sorry for your loss, may her soul rest easy," I said.

I continued" I also lost my dad, and we always have his memorial on this month every year. I don't know how this year will be spent coz apparently while you were away I fucked up and mum doesn't talk to me."

I leaned back to the chair as I looked at her and she exhaled out loudly then said " No matter how gravious your mistakes is, a mother's love is always still. You just need the right words and everything will be back on track.''

The next day after my classes with her , I never felt like staying back at home with Ian. So I went to Bens Cafeteria. It was the best in town. I got there but he wasn't there.Just Sandra the wife. She was Spanish but understand English.

" Buenas Terdas , Senora ¡" I said .I wasn't frankly good at it ,but I did some Spanish in school.

" Holla Roberto, I can see you're getting good at it," she Replied.

" Yes, am Just trying," I said.

She asked what the problem was but with a big plastic smile I assured her that I was fine.

She said " Don't try that plastic smiley thing with me, but don't worry I always got your back." She went to the back leaving me the wondering how she was good at reading me.

She came with a mug of milkshake, chocolate flavored and I was like " Yeeei! gracias, that's why I love you Senora ¡.

" Awww ! I love you too, but take it before it's warm ," she said as I looked at her smilingly brightly then we said in unison

" It's never sweet ,when warm."

I had that statement in my mind. She said it everytime I went for the milkshakes or ice cream. When I was done ,I went home and prepared some dinner . After dinner I was in my room doing my Biology assignment,when Miss Argan's words crossed my mind " A mother's love is always still, you just need ....." and the fact that she was going to be late . So I decided to Make things right with momma.

The next morning immediately momma left I began to mix those ingredients . I was cooking some cookies. My so called cousin came down and found me humming as I mixed the flour with the eggs.

" Why are you so happy today ? he asked .I looked at him as if trying to tell him " Fuck off," . But I couldn't afford to have spoilt moods when cooking. Momma always says " If you want good results when cooking, the preparations should be made with a happy soul."

So I decided not to answer him. He shrugged his shoulders and went to the table served himself. I was done cooking before Roman came .So I packed some and went with some to the study room. I gave them to her when she came .

" This are for you ," I said as I handed them to her.

Smilingly she took them saying " Woow! that's so wonderful and thoughtful of you ."

Sooner we were done with the session. I went to Bens Cafeteria still it was Sandra doing the services.

" Senora, can I have my specialty and another that's chocolate flavored but with " Sorry momma " on the side," I said . She walked to the back to prepare my order then said " now I get it."

She came back and handed them in and said " Hurry before they are warm, you know , " she smiled as I finished the sentence for her " It's never sweet when warm."

As usual some broken Espanol with her was necessary before I left. I said " Gracias Senora , Adios¡."

She could reply with some heavy Spanish words that I never understood but that didn't matter at all.

I was very much aware that Wednesday's afternoon is mum's free day. So I went to her place to mend the broken ties. She was about to leave with her friends as I walked in.

" Isn't a cold milkshake ,choc flavored advisable on a sunny afternoon? I asked . She looked at me as I handed her the milkshakes and cookies.She asked what I had gone to do at her place but when she turned the mug around and saw " Sorry Momma." She said to her friends " Guys am so sorry but I'll have to bail on you today. "

The disappointment on their faces couldn't be hidden but they walked away. She asked me to follow her as she led the way. She took me to a chilling spot. It was within the vicinity. It was so green and neatly kept . No dirt at all.The air was fresh, the breeze so cool , calming, mind relaxing and therapeutic. It wasn't noisy at all just the birds chirping making some melodious harmonies which am sure they were not aware of.

We sat for some seconds without saying a single word and I decided to break the silence.

"Am not really doing well, " as I looked down to my drink . Mum looked at me then back to wherever she looked at among the many trees.

" What's the problem , are you having fever or something? " she asked.

" Am just sinking everyday, and I don't know what to do anymore. Sometimes I try to call when am hurting but I can't, so I hide it." I replied

" Why? am your mother you don't have to hide anything," She said .

" After what I said , you know ,ummmh ,you and dad , you know,"I was there trying to say whatever I said that day but I couldn't and she finished my sentence" I already know ."

I continued" Am sorry for that mum, that day I just let my feelings to take control.But trust me , if I could turn back the clock I'd make sure I spend every minute of every hour ,every day with you ." I took her arm and placed it on my heart and said " can you feel that ? my heart is beating, my mind is racing and you're the reason. I just want to fix what I've broken. Don't leave me , come back to me , let's be happy once more. It's hard to forget ....."

She shushed me and hugged me tightly saying" This means alot to me. " I also hugged her back tightly and said " I missed you momma" . I missed you even more son . We sat upright as she sobbed and smiled at the same time. I wiped her tears and she wiped mine. We hugged once more and we walked home .

The next day I told Roman about everything and I thanked her by the way. Her advice worked .

When Momma came back that evening at the dinner table I asked her whether I could move to my brother's room and she was like " I have no problem, this is your room and James is Your brother."

This other guy on the table with us was like " I also have some news ," mum asked him what the news was . I didn't bother to even listen to him . He was a jack and a looser. I kept eating but mum stopped and listened to him then he said " Auntie ,thank you for the treatment you have given me since I came here ,but now I guess my stay has come to an end."

I went to cloud nine , it's like I was high on something, ecstasy probably . I couldn't hide that happiness. I couldn't even explain how I felt at the moment. I wanted to scream but I couldn't, maybe jump in happiness but still no. I was so overwhelmed with joy. I didn't even listen to them converse with Momma anymore.

Reconciling with Momma was good news . Ian leaving was both good and bad news. The part where he was leaving was good news. I never had to see his annoying face every morning when I woke up and every night before I slept.

I never had to put up with his boring a** everyday. I never had to share my space with him anymore. That's why it's good news.

It's bad news coz this son of a bitch was waiting for my mother to give me a go ahead to change room so that he can decide to leave my home .

Anyway we all know after he leaves , am not changing rooms anymore. I prefer my room to James'

Mahn I had never been happy like that before in a very long time.