Sacrifice Humanity for Sanity

Hope stared up at the ceiling, exhausted but unable to sleep. The words Elijah had parted with earlier that day still made rounds in her mind.

As if they were all thinking the same thing, Newt looked at Hope, nestled between him and Albus—finally back in Albus' bed again—and asked, "What did Elijah mean? Turn what off?"

Letting out a soft sigh, she nodded. "Vampires, usually the younger the easier, can sort of disassociate from the reality of the situation," Hope bit her lip and glanced over at Newt, "meaning they're able to turn off their humanity. It's like night and day. Flipping off a switch. One moment everything hurts, every emotion weighs you down, but when you turn it off it…" she trailed off, remembering the last time she'd flipped the switch.

"It's dangerous," Hope murmured, "for a Vampire to turn off their humanity, but it makes everything so much easier."

Albus stroked lightly along her shoulder. "And he thinks doing so will save your mind from the Dementors?"

Hope nodded, turning to look at him. "It's a good theory at least. If you couldn't care less about anything around you, what more can they take? I just don't know if I can do it."

"You don't know how?" Newt asked gently.

A humorless smile graced her lips. "I know how it's just," she swallowed and looked up at the ceiling again, "I know won't want to turn it back on."

Two sets of soft lips brushed against her jaw and neck. 

Albus touched his lips to her ear. "We'll cross that bridge when we get to it."

With a shuddering breath, Hope nodded and closed her eyes. She may not have to turn it off if her sentence was short. It depended on what kind of magic Elijah could work in the Ministry- no pun intended. 

Hope turned over to lay on her stomach, trying to get comfortable. Why was it when all a person wanted to do was sleep, that's the one thing they couldn't manage to do?

The weight of Newt's arm rested across her lower back while Albus's fingers combed across her forehead and through her hair. 

Hope didn't even remember closing her eyes.