CHAPTER SEVEN

3. THE CHALLENGING STAGE.

The challenging stage usually comes up after marriage. At this stage you are no longer fighting to discover who you married as a spouse but also those who influence his decision-making.

At times couples are often in disagreement with themselves as inspired by their guardians, mentor, and spiritual teacher depending on whose advice they heed.

The parents both from the male or female side known as the in-laws may have contradictory opinions and beliefs which leads to disagreements and conflicts.

The in-laws from the male side might see the wife as their son's negative influence and might think the wife's inference in their family business is a huge hindrance.

They see the wife as the controller of their son and seem threatened by every single step he takes especially when those steps and decision making is not from his parents.

The parents of the groom expect consultations, and even to an extent hope he shares his ideas.

While the woman would feel her husband's parents are the intruders, there is a huge assignment for the wife and her assignment is gaining trust from the family member of her husband.

Once they welcome her with open arms the marriage is as well as signed and sealed but they condemn every one of her actions means she wasn't their choice and perhaps the woman they had in mind to bring into the family didn't eventually come.

At this stage, the woman might be weary if she isn't having peace with her husband as well as his parents.

When his parents are aggressive towards her she will have to withdraw and keep away from their sight.

At times financial problems are strong enough to cause one making a major mistake at your marital home.

If the woman is earning more than the man sometimes it gets into her head and starts misbehaving and bossing her husband around.

Most times some men don't find peace at home, they go to the blossom of their girlfriend's place to seek comfort.

By this time if couples have wedded at least they would produce 2-3 kids making divorce extremely difficult.

At this stage, the wife goes through a lot of psychological and emotional trauma leading to the void of the main ingredient that sustains marriage which is love.

There are challenges one faces at this stage and if you neglect them and get married, it becomes a burden one bears for eternity.

It either makes your home or breaks your home if you allow it to overwhelm you.