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Saiyan Gods - A Kidnapping Space Monkey

One starry night, Master Roshi shoots his newest technique into the sky. The Kamehameha hits Leon's spaceship and he crashes into the sea. Master Roshi: "Whatever I hit, I hope it wasn't important." Leon: -_- Anyways... Dragon Ball! Every fan may rejoice! Leon has been reborn as a Saiyan, and he plans to capitalize on his situation! A wholesome novel about growing up, while balancing the fate of the Universe. Witness how our "Hero of Justice and Everything Good in the World", learns Martial Arts, milks every last drop of Dragon Magic, and kidnaps children! HE KIDNAPS CHILDREN!?! Author: Yes, but he can't go to prison since his body isn't even 6. THAT'S NOT THE POINT! KIDNAPPING IS WRONG? Author: Oh yeah, he brainwashes people too. But don't worry, Leon is a good guy. (╯°Д°)╯︵ ┻━┻ Author: ^^ ... Alternate Title: "Ascending to Godhood with Babysteps" ... The following is a non profit, fan based parody. Dragon Ball, Dragon Ball Z, Dragon Ball GT, and Dragon Ball Super are all owned by FUNimation, Toey Animation, and Akira Toriyama. I don't claim ownership over any of the original work's characters. The cover image is taken from Dragon Ball Super. Please support the official release.

AcolyteofSolaris · Anime et bandes dessinées
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18 Chs

C.4: Talking about our feelings...

Leon blinked in surprise.

"Master... Roshi?"

"The one and only. Turtle Hermit. Martial God, or the newest addition: 'Beater of Children.'"

The old man chuckled sadly. Taking out his pipe and lighting it with a Ki Blast.

Now that the blood is gone, he noticed that the kid was naked. Taking his coat out of a Hoi-Poi capsule, he covers the boy up. Looking away he asks:

"What's your name."

Leon, struggling with the coat 5 times his size, answers as Roshi blew smoke circles away from them.

"My name is Leon."

"Oh."

They both fall silent at that. Listening to the sea and enjoying the morning sun.

While the outside was peaceful, Leon's mind was racing.

'I'm actually on Earth?!!'

He couldn't quite believe his luck. He thought he'd be sent to some jungle planet or a semi-civilized world. If he was really lucky, a world where he could hitch a ride on a spaceship. Never did he ever expect for such a fortune to land on his lap, just like that. Martial Arts, Senzu Beans, Dragon Balls and brilliant scientists.

For Leon, who only knew suffering since his arrival in this world couldn't help but feel emotional. He was never the smartest person in class, but he could always offer an interesting perspective that his smarter classmates often overlooked. Thinking about Dragon Ball, he had often fantasized about what he would do with his Wishes, Martial Arts or interesting technology. He was pretty sure that he could do better than Goku and the Z-Fighters, who could only beg Shenron to revive those who already died.

"What year is it?"

Hearing the question, the Turtle Hermit looked at Leon confused, but remembered that he was drugged up for an unknown amount of time. He takes his pipe into hand, breathing in and out slowly to calm down.

"It's the year 735. It's actually already winter, and christmas is over. But the climate around here is warm all year long. If this was a forest it would be a jungle."

Leon nods at this, his blue lips from the cold sea, being warmed by the rising sun.

'This means I get at most two wishes until Frieza destroys planet Vegeta'

He smiles at this.

Master Roshi on the other hand, had even more questions about Leon. Looking at him, his eyes were clear, and his aura felt pure. He didn't look like someone who had been tortured at all. Except for the dark circles around his eyes, he looked completely healthy. As long as you ignored the fact that his eyes were darting back and forth looking out for the man called Bunk in every shadow.

He however was already old, and had learned to wait for the answers to the questions he wondered about. Like what the newest trend in women's swimwear will be? Who will win the Martial Arts tournament? What kind of pudding is still in the fridge?

All answers this far have been the most delightful, when he didn't force them out, but let them come on their own. So he started talking instead.

"Isn't this planet beautiful? A calm blue sea, pillowy clouds and a clear sky. Clean fresh air, and a warm sun. It's a small piece of heaven, isn't it? Oh! Don't forget about the sweet girls!"

Leon could only agree. In his old world. Not even to talk about the polluted air and sea, even at day passing planes would cut a white hole into the blue sky, and the only green he ever saw, was in the gaps between the asphalt roads.

He was only a student back then. No big accomplishments. No great enemies. And no girlfriend. Due to the urging of his religious parents to wait until after school. Thinking back on his old life, he sighed.

The friendships he made never lasted long. He only had few friends. But when he talked with them about the topic, none of them ever considered him their best friend, or even in the top three. Despite the fact that Leon held them dear, even more than his family.

Of course he loved his parents too. But, well. They did a lot of things wrong with him as the one and only child. Leaving him in low spirits during his teenage and grade school years.

"Would you believe me, if I said that you shot down a spaceship?"

Roshi chuckled at that. He was more inclined to believe that this was the nickname for his extravagant escape vehicle, but he agreed with him anyway. An amused glint hidden behind his sunglasses.

"Mhm. And seeing your tail... You must be an alien, right!?"

Leon jerks his head in surprise.

"How do you know?"

"I'm an old man. I just know things. That's why they call me a sage."

Leon looked at the old man, like he discovered a new species of bull****.

"Master Roshi truly is unfathomable."

"Yes, yes. Learn from me kid. And my endless wisdom will one day be yours."

"Hahaha!"

His laugh was crisp and clear like a bell. Master Roshi nodded at that. A child should laugh all the time, sleep well, eat well, study and train well. Old men like him should worry about grown-up-problems.

"And if I look at the full moon, I transform into a giant monkey. 10 times as strong, and 100 times as furry."

He had his arms up, trying to look down at the old master with a fierce expression, that just looked cute on his small body.

Master Roshi wasn't intimidated at all, only jerking up his eyebrows.

"Is that so? And if I cut your tail off, you'll revert back to being a child."

At those words, Leon paled a little. An old man's intuition can't be underestimated, even if he's joking around.

"Did I hit the nail on the head. Hehehehe. You'll be a great monkey when you grow up. Just don't reveal your weak point this easily next time."

He laughed like an old witch at Halloween, while ruffling his hair. Leon didn't find it unpleasant at all. He felt cared for, and couldn't help but smile again.

"What are we waiting for then? Let's get your 'spaceship' out of the water, before it starts to rust."

Twirling his staff, a Ki Bubble formed around the two of them. Turning to the opposite direction of where Leon was 'sand-swimming' this morning, he didn't waste time and walked on.

Leon, seeing an ability he hadn't seen in the show gaped at the shimmering sphere, before stumbling on the long coat that Roshi gave him. The Hermit notices this with Ki Sense and snickers into his beard.

"What? They call me the Turtle Hermit, right? It would be quite embarassing if I didn't know how to keep my feet dry!"

Roshi seemed to be similar, yet different to the one in the show. Maybe you just can't fully fit a character as old and unpredictable as Roshi into the framework of an anime? Or he just didn't have a reason to act as reliable as now in the show, since he was surpassed pretty soon by his teenager students. Leon now being a baby, must have made the old Master grow up a bit!

This fresh impression was shattered as Roshi whipped out an ero magazine, his nose bleeding, while the Ki Bubble started to revolt.

"Whoops! It seems like I got a bit rusty, since I don't use ths technique often."

The old man tried to play it off, but still put away the magazine.

"Off to new adventure!"

Humming a pirate song, Leon decided just to play along.

I had a little laugh for no reason at the chapter title.

C.4

C4

See Four

That led me to the memory of a scene in the TFS (TeamFourStar) Helsing Parody, where a british politician sacrifices himself to buy time for the Main Cast.

"Killing ghouls and zombie fools, and all of Satan's demon horde."

It's a sad thing though, that Leon can't just blow up the Bunk in his head, and needs to get creative.

AcolyteofSolariscreators' thoughts