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Out for Karma: One Piece

Auteur: Hrist_Waltz
Anime et bandes dessinées
Actuel · 1.4M Affichage
  • 74 Shc
    Contenu
  • 3.9
    35 audimat
  • NO.200+
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Synopsis

By the real Author of Out for Karma: One Piece. Posted first here on scribblehub with the same name. Follow Rick as he' s sent into the world of One piece by a goddess to get good Karma! But everything didn't go as expected! Rick was sent 2 years before Gol D. Roger's death in the body of a 4 years old! Read how Rick's had to spent his life until he could meet the straw-hats and share their adventures! The picture is from here: https://www.pixiv.net/en/artworks/13507605 and is only temporary.

Étiquettes
7 étiquettes
Chapter 1Chapter 1: Dawn of a new romance

Author's note : Since some idiot is plagiarizing my story why not post it myself? I hope you'll enjoy.

"It has been a long time Rick"

In a vast white void a young man was sitting on the floor. Shaking his head around in panic trying to see the owner of the voice that spoke to him.

"H-hello? Is anyone here?"

Suddenly a golden mist appeared before him. By watching carefully the young man could observe the minute change in the mist form, going from a small cloud to a humanoid form.

"I almost forgot."

The sound of fingers snapping echoed through the never ending white space.

The young man then grabbed his head with his hands tightly as if he was trying to hold every part of it together. A pain as he never felt before made him think that his brain would blast out of his skull.

Though the pain was there for a few seconds for the young man, it was a few seconds too many. The pain left him breathless and after a couple of minutes panting, he finally calmed down.

If one would have looked in his eyes before the snap sound and now, they would have seen two different men.

Gone was the confused and panic stricken man; replaced by a man with assurance, experience.

A man who knows.

A man who knows the what, where and how of his actual situation and has a good idea of the why, as for the when… only the golden mist knows that answer.

" Goddess, long time no see."

" It wasn't that…"

" long for you an immortal Goddess who lived eons and will live for eons, but for a mortal man like me who has a 85 years life expectancy on average, it is.

Now that that's out the way… : What the bloody bell! It hurts! Was it really necessary?"

"I'm sorry Rick but yes it was, unlocking memories sealed by a divine being hurts a lot, because all memories return at once. All types of them, pure memory to feelings, to physical memory. Everything that you experience in any way becomes a memory for your soul."

"And an omnipotent Goddess such as yourself can't find a way for.. I don't know, unlocking them bit by bit ?"

"The results of what you're speaking of were disastrous."

"Wonderful."

"I'm sorry."

"Anyway, why am I here again? I thought you said that by living my life I will restore the karmic balance. After everything I did, I would have thought that it was done, that I was not in the red again but in something like green?"

"Well, about that… your good actions did give you enough karma for a dozen lives at most, the problem is, you accumulated negative karma worth a thousand lives and then some…

So 999 more to go ? Good luck bye!"

"Nu-hu, you stay right here! I still have questions!"

The goddess sighed, or at least Rick, by watching the golden mist move though she sighed.

"Go ahead".

"Ok, first thing first: what about my wife?"

"She lived 5 more centuries, raised your children, and grandchildren etc.. until the 5th generation. Then she had enough and missed you too much so she went for one last journey, she was very happy."

"Thank you.

Second: What's my next world? Can I keep my powers? What new powers will I get?"

" In order: One piece, no, not gonna tell until you're there".

"One piece ? That's sweet."

"Well it is your favorite manga after all, that's why I chose it, better chances for you to earn lot of Karma"

"Aww, you do care for this little mortal."

"Of course I do, would not have made you my champion otherwise"

"You didn't choose me. You had just me and no one else."

"Maybe, but I do care, now hurry up through the portal."

" Fine, but before that… Going through the portal will selead my previous lives' memories? This place includes, right?"

"Yes."

"And when I get back I'll go through the all snapping fingers and unholy amount of pain, right?"

"Yes."

"Okay, here's an idea, why don't you, instead of sealing my memories, just stranger them away to something else."

"... Like transferring files from a hard drive to an usb stick?"

"Yes, you keep the memories stashed somewhere and when I get back you transfer them back to me. Make a file per life and sub-files for each type of memory.That way when I'm back, it's a transfer of file after file and not everything at once, no more pain for me, and bonus for you, when you're bored you can watch those memories."

"That's… actually pretty clever. Okay let's do this".

Another snap was heard and some kind of altar rose from the floor.From its center, lines began to be drawn along the white surface of this space and went to the direction of the portal. Once connected to it, the lines lighten up in a gold color.

"Aaaaand done. Now every time you pass the portal your unnecessary memories from your previous lives will be transferred and stored. To have them back, you'll just have to touch the altar."

" Good, Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go."

"Wait, I have a question before you leave: what is the bell?"

"What is the bell, what now?"

"Earlier you said " What the bloody bell " "

"Ahh that? Well my wife didn't like me swearing, so with time I learned to swap some words or letters when I swear.

Now for real this time, if you excuse me…

One Piece: HERE I COME ! "

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Table des matières
Volume 1

audimat

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  • Mise à jour de la stabilité
  • Développement de l’histoire
  • Conception des personnages
  • Contexte mondial
Critiques
Aimé
Nouveau
WiLeYBiGhEaD
WiLeYBiGhEaDLv12

Upbeat and entertaining, but not for me. The novel begins with an interesting premise, earning good karma to offset deeds of previous lives. It is a solid start and the follow up is fairly good. The world building is ok, including the basics for the current stat of the world, though you will probably be slightly lost if unfamiliar with the source material as in most fanfics. However, the mc seems to undergo a drastic character change which doesn’t mesh well with the beginning. He becomes childish and immature which doesn’t fit someone who has reincarnated more than once. His body may be a childs but his mind and soul are that of someone who has passed through death more than once. He was even married, but his maturity and experience are abandoned to fit the story. I get the idea, and for one piece, much of it works for the comedy. I smiled more than once, but I also cringed when he started calling Garp his Grandpa due to genuine emotions (especially considering Garp pretty much only beat him). It continues with him being excited for receiving Sengokus hat or his approach to various situations. It is clearly childlike which doesnt fit with his past. The other aspect that pushed me away was the mc’s temporary lack of intelligence to move the plot forward. i.e. forgetting the system which is his most important assest or charging into a group of pirates as a child only to nearly die. Combined with the mc stating he needs to remain weak to join the strawhats, clearly indicates the direction this story will take, which just is not for me. Despite this, the grammer is excellent and the character design(aside from the mc) is also pretty good. There are large sections of dialogue and the worldbuilding isn’t just info dumps but incorporated into the story. Cannot comment on the updates due to them all being a mass upload. Overall, it is entertaining, fairly well written and above avergae for fanfics. The choice of one peice fits the writing style and story direction well (aside from the mc’s past). However, the mc’s childlike character, even with and adult ego and the way/direction the plot progresses with the mc choosing to be weak and the authors use of temporary stupidity/Deus ex machina is clearly targeted to a different audience. If these do not matter to you it is an enjoyable read. But for those who want a bit more maturity and internal consistency, you should probably look elsewhere as like myself, you are not the target audience.

jonathan_Gomez
jonathan_GomezLv2
Daoist423242
Daoist423242Lv12
Kintaro498
Kintaro498Lv4

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