Helpless

"I have no feelings for her!" Jacob's voice was tense, but there was no anger, only deep fatigue and helplessness. One could almost feel his entire body tensing up, his hands rigid as he tried to control himself, not clenching into fists.

However, Jacob's helpless attitude infuriated Anna. Her handsome eyebrows furrowed, and her anger became unstable in her agitation. She closed her eyes to avoid losing control, but her voice betrayed her inner fury. "You do have feelings for her!"

"No!" Jacob's voice rose slightly as he struggled to suppress his emotions. "There are no feelings at all!"

Anna opened her eyes, her voice rising as well, pressing down on Jacob, staring at him incredulously. "There are! I just read your messages!"

"She's just my colleague!"

Both of them raised their voices, Anna's sharp tone clashing with Jacob's deep one, echoing in the small kitchen. Anna leaned forward, gaining the upper hand.

"She! You!" Jacob's frustration boiled over. He wanted to shout to vent his frustration, but he could barely express himself. All his emotions were trapped inside. He could only shout angrily, "You shouldn't have looked at my messages!"

Anna glanced away, but quickly turned back, unwilling to show weakness. Seeing Jacob's burning anger, she shook her head in frustration. "Why are you yelling at me?"

The hurt in her eyes struck Jacob like a blow to the head. Seeing those bright eyes, his helplessness pulled him down quickly, like free-falling. All his emotions dissipated, leaving only a deep sense of powerlessness. "I'm sorry I yelled."

Jacob raised his hands to his head, fingers running through his hair, feeling like his heavy brain was about to explode, yet he was powerless. The sense of helplessness and futility left his heart empty. He didn't want to argue anymore.

But Anna didn't get the message. "Don't take it out on me," she said from her higher ground. "If you keep shouting, others will come over."

The disappointment and reproach in her words stung Jacob. He raised his head, looking at Anna through his fingers, disbelief written all over his face. He could hardly believe Anna had said that. In his deep brown eyes, anger rose and fell, restlessness surged and ebbed, and agitation arose only to dissipate again. His complex expression silently accused her.

Anna uneasily averted her gaze. Jacob's stare made her feel uneasy. She wanted to reconcile, but the words she spoke were different. "It's important that others don't come over."

Hearing her voice, filled with disappointment and anger, Anna couldn't believe it was her own. Every thought in her mind resisted these words; she even hated herself. But she still said them.

Anna turned around to hide her panic, knowing she had made a mistake. Even with her back to Jacob, she could feel his extreme sadness turning into anger. This was a side of Jacob she had never seen, and she lacked the courage to face it.

Yes, Jacob was angry. His eyes widened as his shattered emotions surged again. He knew he should shut up, that the argument should end, but his body impulsively stood up, as if anger had taken over. "Who would come? Simon?"

In his mind, he could clearly hear his own voice. He hoped Anna would deny it, would retort, would confront him again. But he was disappointed. This time, all he got was silence. Silence and nothing more.

Jacob stood there, wanting to sit but remained standing; wanting to stand straight but unable to bear the weight on his shoulders. He half-squatted, every muscle tensed, then slowly, slowly stood up. The emotions on his face receded bit by bit, his flushed face turned pale, even the anger at the corners of his mouth and eyes disappeared, replaced by deep despair.

Silence persisted. Anna resumed cutting zucchini, the sound of the knife against the cutting board and the sizzling oil adding to the tension.

The last glimmer of hope in Jacob's deep brown eyes was extinguished. Disbelief flashed across his face, and overwhelming anger made him take two big steps forward. But the kitchen was too small, and he bumped into the stove. He didn't care, his mind focused on one thought. "Did you sleep with him?"

Anna didn't answer, concentrating on cutting the zucchini. Jacob tapped her shoulder. "Did you? Answer me!"

"Don't touch me!" Anna's response was the only one.

But this response enraged Jacob even more. He looked at Anna, trying to see her eyes, seeking the answer to his question, even if he wasn't sure he wanted to hear it. "Did you sleep with him or not? Yes or no?"

"Jacob! Don't touch me!" Anna screamed with all her might, pushing Jacob away. But this time, she was on the defensive.

"Did you?" Jacob roared like an angry lion, his despair dragging him into endless darkness.

"Jacob, stop!" Anna put down the knife, raising her hands, closing her eyes, but not daring to lift her head. Her voice was cold.

"Stop what?" Jacob bumped against the wall, then stood there, staring at Anna's profile, her face refusing to meet his gaze. Sadness and bitterness weighed on his shoulders, nearly suffocating him. Jacob looked at Anna, and in that moment, all his anger vanished, leaving only confusion and a sense of falling with no end in sight.

"Did you or didn't you? It's a simple question. Yes or no." Jacob's voice was calm, like a still lake, clear enough to see the ripples and debris at the bottom. "Did you?"

The intense conflict from a moment ago, like a comet crashing into the earth, was now calm. The sizzling oil sound grew louder.

Anna remained silent, lowering her hands and staring at the zucchini. Her eyes lost focus. She wanted to look at Jacob but lacked the courage. She knew that the face she once loved had now lost all its light and color.

Jacob quietly watched Anna, silently. Then he slumped his shoulders, turned around, and sat down again, picking up his wine, silent.

"I won't answer your question." Anna resumed her work, picking up the knife to cut the zucchini. She shook her head and whispered.

Jacob paused with his wine. "Why can't you look me in the eye and answer?" But his question received no response. His emotions clashed inside him, tearing him apart, ready to explode at any moment. "Look at me!" Jacob shouted desperately, like a thunderclap. This was his only request; he wanted to see the eyes he once loved.

Anna was startled, closing her eyes and shrinking back, but she refused to retreat. She turned and shouted back, "Don't shout!"

"I'll shout if I want to!"

"No, you can't. Not in my house!"

Their irrational shouting filled the air, making the room tremble, even the warm yellow light turning cold. Their uncontrollable anger burned away all their rationality, words spilling out without thought.

"Fine, then I'll go to my house! I want to go to my own house! Don't I want to go home? I want to go now!" Jacob's emotions exploded, his muscles tensed, shouting loudly.

Anna was also furious, holding the sharp knife, not backing down. "Why are you yelling at me?"

"What right do you have to say that?" Jacob stared at Anna's back but got no response. "Yes, I want to shout here! I don't want to stay in my own house!"

"Don't shout at me..." Anna's voice was drowned out by Jacob's anger, unable to resist. She threw the knife into the sink and turned away, refusing to continue the conversation.

Jacob continued staring at the sizzling oil, not following Anna's movements. He stood still, watching the tension slowly dissipate. His sadness settled in, the light in his eyes fading, his tense shoulders softening, starting to crumble.

A look of pain crossed his eyes, but he didn't even have the strength to close them. He still held the wine he hadn't sipped, the alcohol unable to numb his nerves.

The sizzling oil echoed in the kitchen, the silence becoming terrifying.