33. Chapter 33

Easily one of the most frustrating things about hatchlings or nestlings was that Gabriel couldn’t punish them trickster style. He was used to a world of instant gratification where assholes got punished instantly – and a good percentage of the time, Gabriel was the one meting out the punishment. Or justice, as he preferred to call it. But whatever name you opted to use, he couldn’t just snap his fingers and punish a nestling or a hatchling when they misbehaved.

No, when Dean acted out – and that was going to be inevitable at some point, though judging from the terrified thoughts running through Dean’s head right now about Castiel leaving, it would be a while yet before they had to worry about that – it would be up to Castiel to punish him. Not that Gabriel would ever really want to punish Dean anyway. The kid had an infuriatingly impressive set of puppy eyes that made Gabriel melt every time he saw them. It was pure luck that Dean hadn’t figured it out yet and started using it to his advantage.

The problem was that Sam wasn’t a nestling. Not yet, anyway. He was still 100% human no matter how often Dean teased him about being part sasquatch. But as Gabriel popped into the kitchen and watched Sam mop helplessly at the beer stain on his shirt and jeans, it didn’t feel that way. He was already way too attached to the damn kid, and it didn’t help when Sam looked up with a wide eyed expression of surprise that somehow managed to look way too innocent.

At that moment, Gabriel was annoyingly aware of just how much he wanted to take Sam away and hide him somewhere safe until he could wipe away the exhaustion and stress that was building underneath Sam’s masks. Sam wasn’t quite as bad off as Dean had been, mostly because he was clinging so tightly to the dream of finishing law school that there wasn’t any room for him to fall apart the way his brother had, but it was inevitable. He would crash and burn hard at some point.

Damn Winchesters. How was it that they always managed to change Gabriel’s mind? Castiel was never going to let him hear the end of this. Not that Gabriel was really ready for that yet. He was perfectly fine playing uncle to Dean for the time being. But when Dean eventually realized that becoming an angel meant that Sam would be left behind – yeah. Gabriel could already picture himself admitting to some stuff that, until now, he’d pointedly not been thinking about. Suddenly he really wanted to bang his head against the wall.

“Need some help?” Gabriel asked when the silence became too heavy for his liking, crossing his arms. He told himself that it didn’t matter for right now, because Sam was still in law school and nothing would happen for another couple of years at least. Teaching the boy a lesson in the short term was definitely something he could cope with.

“Are you offering?” Sam asked warily, throwing the cloth back in the sink. He pulled his wet shirt away from his stomach with a grimace.

By way of response Gabriel snapped his fingers, instantly removing the stain and drying Sam’s clothes. He also removed the puddle of beer from both the table and the floor. “That was a freebie, but the next time you say something like that to your brother, a beer stain will be the least of your concerns.”

Sam actually blinked in confusion, glancing back at the table as though just realizing that Dean was gone. “What do you mean?”

“Uh, do the words ‘you need to stop being so selfish’ ring a bell?” And, okay, maybe he sounded a little pissed off, but it was well deserved. “Dean is already having a hard time with this, Sam. He might not come right out and say it to you, but this isn’t easy. He’s struggling enough as it is. The last thing he needs is you telling him that he’s going to fail somehow. You’re just making it worse.”

“That’s not what I meant!” Sam protested.

Gabriel raised an eyebrow. “Oh really? Because that’s sure as hell what it sounded like.”

“No, I just –” Sam scrubbed a hand through his hair and groaned. “I meant… Dean is always like this. Always. He starts something and then he gets scared and backs off and it ends up ruined, and Cas always ends up leaving, and I just - I don’t want that to happen again. You think I can’t tell the difference between how Dean is now and the last time I saw him? He’s so much better now. Believe me, I just want him to commit to the situation fully so that he can keep Cas’s interest.”

The kind of comment could have easily been taken as another insult. But being around Dean during the past few months had taught Gabriel an awful lot about reading between the lines. He didn’t really agree with Sam’s assessment that Dean was always the one to back off, but he knew exactly where this was coming from. Gabriel’d had the urge to raise John Winchester from the dead just so that the man could be killed again repeatedly, but it was exceptionally strong right now.

“Cassie isn’t going to lose interest,” Gabriel said as patiently as he could. What the hell was in all of the books about the nestling process? He’d known that the information available was sketchy at best, but either the books needed a serious overhaul or Sam had been looking in the wrong places. “It’s not like that, Sammy. This isn’t the kind of thing you do halfway. It’s all or nothing, especially when it comes to your brother. Cas isn’t going anywhere, okay?”

“But he’s an angel, and he always left before,” Sam said.

“He didn’t have anything keeping him here then,” Gabriel replied, but he could tell that Sam didn’t really believe him. The brothers differed in that Dean believed he was the thing that drove everyone away in the end, whereas Sam understood that sometimes people just left because they had to. It was probably where he’d found the confidence to go to Stanford in the first place. But apparently, they were the same in that they thought they would end up alone.

He took a step closer to Sam and put a hand on Sam’s shoulder, the rest of his anger fading away when Sam unconsciously swayed into the touch. It took less than a second to fly them both to the porch, where Castiel was hugging and comforting Dean. Castiel gave them both a hard look when they arrived, and Gabriel reached out to him instinctively. Later, Castiel would get the chance to scold Sam for not being more careful with what he said if he wanted to. Right now, Sam needed to see this.

Castiel frowned at them, but turned back to Dean. “It’s okay, Dean,” he repeated, gently rubbing his arms up and down Dean’s back. Dean squirmed a little, and Castiel shushed him and - though Dean and Sam couldn’t see it - wrapped both of his wings around Dean. It was one of the most intimate things an angel could do. Dean, Gabriel couldn’t help noticing, went lax and curled into the comfort of the wings like he was made for it.

“Not,” Dean managed to choke out. He was shaking, and when he lifted his head a little there were tears streaming down his face.

“Not what, baby?” Castiel asked gently, and Sam sucked in a startled breath. Gabriel squeezed his shoulder in a bid to keep him quiet, even though the two of them couldn’t be seen or heard. Dean would throw a fit if he knew his brother was standing here watching him act this way. And there were some things that Sam shouldn’t know about. But this – this was important.

Dean shook his head, clicking his tongue against the roof of his mouth. It was something he’d started doing in the last couple of days when he was tired or overwhelmed or just didn’t want to talk and wanted his pacifier, though he didn’t seem aware that he was doing it. Normally it would’ve had Castiel or Gabriel giving him a pacifier immediately, but in this case that was definitely not going to happen. And when Dean started to lift his hand, most likely intending to use his thumb as a stand in, Castiel caught his hand and held it to stop him.

“Dean, listen to me. Do you remember when we had a talk at the restaurant?” Castiel asked him, using his free hand to catch Dean’s chin and tip his head up until their eyes made contact. He waited until Dean shakily nodded before continuing. “Everything I said that day is still true now. You shouldn’t be ashamed or embarrassed for not being ready to see Sam and Bobby. If it weren’t for what happened, we wouldn’t be here.”

“B-but… Daddy… y-you…” Dean stumbled over the words, eyes wide and wet, but Castiel understood and kissed his forehead.

“I know. I was going to talk to you tonight about the possibility of me going back to heaven. I was going to break it to you more gently.” He didn’t sound happy, and Sam winced. “It would only be for a little while, and if you needed me I would come right back.”

“And… Uncle Gabriel?”

“He would stay here with you,” Castiel said firmly, leaving no room for argument. “You’re not comfortable with anyone else, and I wouldn’t trust you and Balthazar not to get into a fight.” His mouth quirked into a faint smile. “I’ll be okay, little one. There aren’t many of Raphael’s supporters left, and none of them would dare to do anything. I will have all of my brothers and sisters around if something happens. Besides, I won’t be there for long.”

Dean went quiet, exhaling with a quiet whimper, but the way he grabbed onto the front of Castiel’s shirt spoke volumes.

“I will come back, Dean. I told you I wasn’t going anywhere and I meant it.” He wiped the tears from Dean’s eyes and hugged him, rocking him back and forth. Dean was stiff at first but quickly melted into the hug. “Daddy will come back, and we’ll finish our picnic, and you and Samandriel can have a nice swim in the lake together. Maybe we can even convince Uncle Gabriel to make real ice cream, would you like that?”

Gabriel didn’t stick around for Dean’s hesitant nod, sensing the onslaught of crying that was about to occur. He flew Sam upstairs instead of back to the kitchen, because Bobby and Rufus had relocated there. Sam stumbled away as soon as Gabriel released his shoulder, sinking down onto the guest bed. He sat there for a moment, staring vacantly at the ground, before he looked up at Gabriel, who didn’t miss the fact that the surprised look on Sam’s face was tinted with a hint of wistfulness.

“I’ve never seen Dean act like that before,” he said finally.

“I don’t think Dean was ever given the chance to,” Gabriel said as tactfully as possible, which probably wasn’t very tactful at all considering he was still thinking about smiting John Winchester. “It’s not your fault, Sam, and you can’t change what happened now. But you can be more supportive. Dean already thinks that Cassie’s gonna leave him. He doesn’t need you telling him that will happen, or worse that there’s something Dean might or might not do that will seal the deal.”

Sam winced. “I’m sorry. I didn’t…” He trailed off. “Cas really loves him.”

“Yeah, he does.”

“You too?”

Pinned by Sam’s hazel eyes, Gabriel couldn’t lie. “He’s my nephew. Of course I love him.”

“I didn’t think angels were capable of that,” Sam muttered, more to himself. He sighed. “Do I want to know why you called Dean a hatchling instead of a nestling?”

“I think you can guess,” Gabriel replied sternly. “I hope I don’t have to tell you that’s very private information right now. Dean isn’t ready for you to know. I only showed you that so you would understand that Cas isn’t going to leave and Dean is trying his best. If you say one word, Sam Winchester –”

“I won’t!” Sam said quickly, holding his hands up. “I won’t, I swear.”

Gabriel studied him, trying to assess how honest he was being. “I mean it, Sam. Not one word. I’m not above taking you over my knee as punishment.”

The idea seemed to leave Sam flabbergasted. He stared at Gabriel, mouth open, and could only manage a squeak of affirmation. Gabriel just smirked at him, pleased that Sam was taking his warning seriously, and impulsively reached out to ruffle Sam’s hair. That brought him back to life, and Sam sputtered indignantly as he reached up to bat Gabriel’s hands away. It was easy to sidestep the flimsy blows, and instinct drove him to pull Sam into a warm hug that had Sam stilling instantly.

“Gabriel?” he asked, sounding confused and a little hesitant and way too young.

“S’okay, Sammy,” Gabriel said, pressing his cheek to the top of Sam’s head. Sam relaxed surprisingly quickly and even brought his arms up to tentatively return the hug. Gabriel closed his eyes, holding in a resigned sigh. Oh yeah. He could see how this was gonna end someday.