Chapter 531: The Society for the Promotion of the Welfare of the Elves

"All three of you are here!" Seeing Harry and the others, Hermione's eyes lit up, "I just finished!".

"Me too!" said Ron triumphantly, throwing down his quill.

Hermione sat down; she put down the things she was carrying on an empty armchair, and drew Ivan's predictions to her.

"You're not going to have a good month, are you?" she said sarcastically as Crookshanks curled up in her lap.

"You know, that's how you treat Professor Trelawney!" said Ivan, looking at the box Hermione had brought. Compared to Harry and Ron, the tragic prophecies she had written were more subtle and less tragic.

"Whatever happens, at least we're forewarned," Ron yawned.

Hermione put Ivan's predictions down and took up Ron's.

"Indeed, that's a good warning. You seem to be choking twice."

"Oh yeah?" said Ron, looking at his predictions. "I'd better change one of them to being trampled by a rampaging hippogriff."

"Don't you think it's a bit obvious that you made them up?" said Hermione.

"How dare you!" said Ron, with sarcastic indignation. "We've been here all night, working like house elves!".

Hermione raised her eyebrows and looked at Ron in displeasure!

"Sorry, sorry, the wording was inappropriate," Ron said hastily.

Harry put down his quill as well, as he had just finished predicting his own death by beheading at the end of the month.

"Hermione, what's in the box?" asked Ivan, pointing to it. He thought it best not to let Hermione go on about her three Divination assignments.

"I was going to talk to you about it. It's something I've been working on a lot for this week. We have to do something for the house elves," Hermione said with a smile.

She removed the lid and showed them the contents. Inside were about fifty badges, all different colors, but with the same letters: S.P.E.W.

"Spew?" said Harry, picking up a badge and looking at it. "What's it about?"

"It's not spew," Hermione said impatiently. "It's S-P-E-W. It stands for the Elven Platform for the Defense of Workers' Rights."

"I've never heard of it," said Ron.

"I've never heard of it either!" added Harry.

Ivan didn't speak. He knew what was going on. It seemed that Hermione wasn't satisfied with just writing articles for the paper.

She had always talked about doing something tangible for the house elves, and she meant this.

"Of course you haven't heard of it," Hermione said briskly, "I've just started it."

"Yeah?" said Ron slightly surprised. "How many members do you have?"

"Well, if you three join... Four," Hermione said.

"Join?! And you think we want to go around with badges that mean 'puke', don't you?" said Ron.

"It's S-P-E-W!" said Hermione heatedly. "I was going to put a Stop to the outrageous abuse of our fellow magical creatures and Campaign for a change in their legal status... but it wouldn't fit. So that's the title of our manifesto."

He showed them the sheet of parchment full of words.

"This is our specific letter. I've researched it thoroughly in the library. Elven slavery goes back centuries. I can't believe no one has done anything about it until now."

"Hermione, open your ears," Ron said loudly. "THEY LIKE IT! They like being enslaved."

"Our short-term goals," Hermione said, as she stood up, speaking even louder than Ron, and acting as if she hadn't heard a word, "Are to ensure house elves fair wages and working conditions. Our long-term goals include changing the law on non-wand use, and trying to get an elf on the Department of Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures, because they're scandalously underrepresented."

"Easy, Hermione!" Ivan managed to get her to sit down.

Hermione looked annoyed, and kept looking unhappily at Ron, who also looked unhappy.

"Well, how can we do all this?" asked Harry quietly.

"We start by recruiting members," Hermione said cheerfully. "I figured two Sickles to join buys a badge! And with the proceeds we can fund our leaflet campaign. You're the treasurer, Ron; I've got you a collection tin upstairs. And Harry, you're the secretary, so you might want to write down everything I say now, as a record of our first meeting. As for Ivan, I think you're the right one to be president, because you're very famous in the magic circle, which favors our publicity, and you also have to deal with the Ministry of Magic. And I'm the vice-president of the Elven Platform for the Defense of Workers' Rights, and I'm primarily responsible for all the day-to-day affairs; that's all."

There was a pause in which Hermione smiled at the three of them.

Ivan frowned as he looked at the bylaws of the Elven Platform for the Defense of Workers' Rights written by Hermione. It seemed that she did indeed seek a lot of information.

Ron stared at Hermione dumbfounded, slightly wild-eyed and open-mouthed.

Harry sat back, torn between exasperation at Hermione and amusement at the look on Ron's face.

After a while, there was silence and a moment of peace before the storm.

"I'm not in!" said Ron directly, pushing the plate in front of him.

"Ron?!" Hermione's eyebrows rose again. "We're saving the house elves!"

"I've said it before, they like it, they like being slaves to each other!" said Ron stubbornly, "I'm not going to follow you into the kitchen and mobilize them to stop working. I'm definitely not going to do that."

"No one likes being a slave. This is extremely unfair to house elves," Hermione said, "Whether they are wizards or house elves, we are all born equal. Wizards cannot build their magical civilization on the toil and oppression of house elves. We must stop this phenomenon."

"You don't know anything about house elves, Hermione!" said Ron, "Don't convince me to participate in your 'puke' trick."

"It's not a trick; it's not throwing up. It's house elf rights..."

Before Hermione could finish, Ron stood up from his chair and shouted in his loudest voice. "IN MY OPINION, IT'S PUKING. I DON'T WANT TO LOOK LIKE A FOOL, HANGING THIS BADGE ON MY CHEST AND BEING LAUGHED AT."

They both looked at each other, breathing, and Ron's face turned red. Even his ears were red.

Then he violently picked up his Divination homework and his quill and rushed into his dormitory, the sound he made as he closed the door was especially loud.

"Don't blame Ron, he's been under too much pressure lately, and he's been making tragic predictions in here all night!" said Harry.

He winked at Ivan and hurried back to the dormitory to persuade Ron.