Chapter 7 - Burn

"Who are you? What do you want? Where am I?"

"I am not a who, but a what. A primordial force. Before the Great Revelation, before the ten heroes, before the first human discovered magic, I existed. I was already old when the first human ignited. I am the Red Phoenix, the protector of every human's Inner Flame.

What you call passion was born of me. It was I who generated the impulse that drives you every day to perform all your actions. You could say that I am the burning within you."

Haruki kept silent and pondered those strong words for a few minutes. Life can be strange. But to go in a split second from being brutally slaughtered in a school meeting to talking to a huge fiery bird-divine entity in the middle of a dark abyss is a strange out of the ordinary.

"I mean, why did you summon me to this... place? Why would a being like you be interested in the insignificant life of an ordinary student?"

"I have already told you, Haruki Shika. I am every man's passion. My task, the reason my wings shake the foundations of the souls I pass through is to ensure that such passion is not extinguished and wasted. For too long, Haruki Shika, you have repressed what made you feel human, alive. Your emotions. Why are you always afraid to let your spark shine?"

"My spark? You mean my emotions? I... I just don't want to... hurt anyone. I-I don't want to-"

"Become a monster?"

"N-no, I-I mean maybe, but sometimes all you need to lose everything is to be... seen as a monster."

"And why don't you want to be seen as a monster?"

"Because then... I'd be all alone."

"Would it hurt you, being alone?"

"... yes. I don't want to be alone."

"Because it hurts?"

"Yes, because it hurts."

"But you aren't alone, are you? How many people do you meet every day? How many people do you talk to? How many people know you?"

"I guess a lot, but that's besides the point. They don't like me. At best, they just see that I exist, and at worst they despise me."

"So you aren't really afraid of being alone, you're afraid of not being liked."

"I suppose you're correct."

"So what really hurts you: their hate or their lack of love towards you?"

"I-I don't know... isn't that the same thing?"

"It may or may not be, depending on how well your eyes are working right now."

"Look, can we just skip to the part where you... kill me or whatever. I had a long day and... and this isn't helping at all."

"Do you want to cry?"

"No one wants to cry."

"Then do you need to?"

"I'd rather not do it."

"You'd rather not do something you need to do?"

"I don't need to cry!"

"Then why are you crying?"

"Because of you!"

"Is it because of me or is it because the reality of things has finally hit you?"

"W-what are you even saying?"

"Tell me, Haruki Shika, what is a monster to you?"

"A monster? A monster... a monster is someone who can't control himself."

"Then all humans are monsters."

"That doesn't make any sense."

"No human can truly control himself. Why does your mother prepare coffee so many times? It's not rational, it's not needed, it's almost as if she can't control it."

"It's her Centre."

"So? Isn't your Centre emotions? Then why are you suppressing your Centre?"

"... a monster can hurt others."

"Then all humans are monsters."

"Stop this nonsense!"

"When you get together with someone, you hurt another person who loved you. Every meal you have, you have stolen from someone who needed it more than you. Every time they look at you in a way that makes you uncomfortable and they force you to go against your very essence, they are hurting you. And every time you feel obliged to act this way, you are hurting yourself."

"I can do it! It's my life!"

"But is it the life you desire?"

"It's the only life I'm sure I won't be seen as... different."

"... do you really want to know what you think is a monster?"

"Enlighten me, oh great bird."

"You think a monster is something unnatural, something that shouldn't exist."

"It's possible."

"It's exactly like this."

"Yeah, I guess it is."

"But what is more unnatural than someone who doesn't want to live a happy life, someone who shuts down his emotions, someone who neglects his own passion, someone who has stopped being the one in control of his life?"

"..."

"In your desperate attempt to avoid becoming one, you have turned yourself into a monster, Haruki Shika."

"I... I am a monster?"

"Yes, yes you are."

Haruki sat down, facing down, looking at his shoes. He felt his spirit falling, falling, falling down, shrouded in darkness. Tears ran down like rain, like raging rivers along his cheeks. The weight was unbearable. The weight of admitting that thing was right.

He was a monster.

"But don't despair."

"... h-how can I not?"

"Return human. Ignite your flame. Free yourself from the heaviness you had to carry for too long. Burn, Haruki, burn. Not because it's right, not because it's just, not even because it's in your instincts, in your very nature. But because that is what you want now, that is what makes you happy, what makes you alive, what makes you... shine.

Burn."

"Well that was easier than I thought. My muscles must be in fantastic shape. Hey, teach! Is it ok if I broke his nose?"

"You better hope that's all that you did, you moron."

"Professor Takeda, don't be so mad at me. It's not my fault your student was no match for my muscles. Well, I'll cut him some slack, no one is. Isn't that right guys?"

"Yeah, you got it Raiden!"

"Kinniku-kun, want to have lunch together?"

"H-hey, I was about to ask it!

"I thought of it first!"

"Girls, girls, don't fight, there are enough muscles for everyone! But today I have early training, so-"

"Maybe you should train your eyeballs."

"What?"

Raiden turned around and what he saw could have very well have been a ghost. Haruki was standing at the edge of the ring, his body shrouded in red energy that wiggled around like a hungry fire.

"Hehe, back from the dead with a big mouth, huh?"

"Not as big as yours. Did you really think that would be enough to put me down?"

"Well I did hit you hard with my muscles, though of course, my muscles can hit a lot harder."

"So can I."

"Oh, really? Well, unfortunately my muscles make me an immovable object."

"Well then, let's see what happens when an immovable object meets... an unstoppable force."

And with that, Haruki vanished, surprising everyone. He reappeared half a second later next to Raiden, grabbed his face and easily slammed him into the ground.

"Well, it looks like you weren't that immovable after all."

Suffice to say, everyone's jaws were on the floor as they couldn't believe their eyes. Students from both class 5A and 5B started asking each other "Is Raiden on the ground?" as if it was just a rumour, something they had heard, not a fact that they had just witnessed.

Even Akira didn't expect this turn of events. For the first time in basically forever his friend's soul was burning with determination. Perhaps this would have been a good time to tell him...

"... so... are you going to get up or should I put a blanket on you to help you sleep?"

"You... BASTARD!!!" Raiden shouted as his aura nearly broke the ring in half. Just by contracting his back muscles, he jumped up and regained his footing. He was now absolutely livid.

"I'll break every single one of your bones, with my mighty muscles."

"Let's see you try!" Haruki replied with a bit of excitement.

The musclehead charged at him with his full force and he barely dodged his powerful bunch which generated a strong and concentrated gust of wind that made Takada's glasses fly away from his face.

Raiden tried hitting him right on the face, but Haruki was quick to dodge and blast his opponent away, nearly sending him flying. Raiden grabbed a block of the ring and threw it towards Haruki, who managed to evade it just in the nick of time only for Raiden to charge at him from his blind spot and unleash a flurry of blows.

The boy from 5A however was able to block with relative ease the advance of the blonde and punched him hard on the chest. Just as Raiden was about to fall off the ring, Haruki caught him and slammed him back at the center.

"We are not done yet, let's keep going until we are both burnt out!"

"Who do you think you are talking to? My muscles never burn out!"

And so the two charged at each other again, each attack sending shockwaves in the entire room and raising the excitement of everyone. No one was silent, everyone was cheering, even the teachers were standing and shouting.

Haruki took a step back and prepared himself. Raiden also contracted his muscles as much as he could. This would be their final exchange.

"W-what is this? This fire burning inside of me? I don't know but... it feels really good... for the first time in forever... I feel like I can genuinely smile! This is... happiness! This is... freedom!"

Flying through the air like an eagle at impossible speed, Haruki unleashed one more punch that took Raiden completely by surprise and erased whatever was left of the arena.

The sound barrier was shattered.

In the aftermath of that, Raiden was imprinted on the wall and Haruki was standing all alone at the center, air currents escaping from his body as if he was a living nuclear reactor cooling off.

After a few seconds of total silence, Haruki seemed to snap back to reality and with a surprised and worried expression he hurried towards his opponent.

"Raiden! Are you okay? I'm sorry, maybe I was a bit too rough... I-I may have got a little too excited... can you h-"

Before he could finish, Haruki was hit by a hard punch in the face, and started to fall back, but he was caught by the shirt by none other than Raiden, who was looking at him furiously.

"Crap, he's so mad I knocked him out... he's going to end me!"

He braced himself for an impact that never came.

"Fool."

"What?"

"You fool! You must not say such things after you've won! You only insult the loser by dragging yourself down? Are you saying my muscles lost to a wimp? That's impossible! Then stop acting like it and keep your head raised high!"

"... o-ok sure..."

Raiden let go of him and Haruki just stood there, unsure of what to do. But right then all students reprised their cheering and he could hear everyone congratulate him. It was a truly weird feeling. He even started blushing a bit.

He just stood there, unsure on what to do. He started bowing repeatedly and kept it up until thankfully Professor Takeda stepped in, patting his back.

"Good job, kid."

"T-thanks..." Haruki replied modestly as he finally was able to make his way up to where he was seated, as he passed by all the smiling and excited classmates. It really was a strange feeling.

As if his life truly had a meaning. And not because the others were smiling, but because he was smiling.

He leaned back his head as he rested it against the hard concrete when he suddenly felt a light tap on the shoulder. He slowly turned around his head.

Akira was smiling at him.

"I actually put in some effort before... and you just came in and stole the show."

"I guess I just put more effort than you, you Mad..."

***

In the streets of the city of Hasu, a boy walks through the stands of the lively market, smiling to himself, all alone. He stands still as he watches the fire-eater put up his performance while eating some pork buns. He sighs peacefully. A moment of rest in a fleeting and turbulent life.