Omake: Mysterious Experts

Ash was having a little problem lately. Namely with Ling and Nian. And they've been influencing the younger generation. Narcissa and the twins were picking up their bad habits.

He stood in front of the two dragons who were lounging around in front of a sofa. Ling was drinking some tequila.

Ash recreated some agave plants and the drunk really liked the drink of bad decisions. Makes sense that she would be making bad decisions.

Nian was wearing a track suit and she was a slob. She scratched her butt while eating some Doritos. Wiping the cheese dust on the leather of the sofa which made Ash's eyebrows twitch.

He squinted his eyes as the two were watching their show with interest.

"Heh, they call those guys demons? Those punks will get taken care of like minor pests here!" Nian was amused as she watched her show.

"Right? If they can get killed by humans who breathe hard, then those guys are weaklings. They even die to sunlight, what demons? Those guys are pansies." Ling took a swig on a bottle of tequila, she was already buzzed out of her mind.

Ash sighed, he knew that putting up Interdimensional Internet would bring some bad too. But he didn't expect that these two would be so enamored by it.

They even quarrelled frequently with Dusk for the remote. Their other sister wanted to watch documentaries instead. But her different interests resulted in fights.

And that meant frequent repairs to the Einstein-Rosen bridge Ethernet cables. It was also annoying to repair the modems. He wasn't an electrical engineer goddammit.

"Oi, what the hell are you two doing? Aren't you supposed to be cleaning your rooms? Instead you're watching anime and being slobs." Ash was getting impatient as he tapped his foot on the floor.

Nian just gave a lazy wave along with Ling. "Yeahhh~ just after this episode." Nian said lazily and Ash almost had an aneurysm due to anger.

He did breathing exercises and calmed himself down. "Be like still water, calm. Cool as ice, these idiots are old and starved of entertainment." Ash breathed in and out.

Nian has already built everything she could build in her thousands of years of life. And Ling can only do so much poetry while in isolation.

Dusk was better than them, though she was a shut in that would make neets crown her as the god of neets. She also has a long stick in her ass, dismissing anyone except his elite ops and her siblings.

"Fine, let's go on an adventure you lazy bums." Ash sighed and he gave in. The two slowly craned their necks towards him and their eyes shone.

"Really? Really? Really!? Yatta! You're the best!" Nian jumped at him and planted kisses on him. Putting cheese dust on his face. He scowled and pushed her.

Ling also gave him a nice and sloppy kiss, but he didn't like her alcohol breath. "Stop kissing me! Clean up first." He huffed and the two saluted.

Ling snapped her fingers and her mist took away any signs of mess around the room. It was spotless.

"What did I say about abusing your powers for this crap? You two ought to have some responsibility." He grumbled and the two snorted.

He sighed and thought they were a lost cause. So he just sat down on the couch with them and they discussed where they'll go.

"Ohhh! Let's go to this place! Kotatsu no Yaiba!" Ling pointed at the show they were watching.

"Idiot, it's Kimetsu no Honda!" Nian argued and the sisters butted heads.

"Shut up, let's just go." Ash rolled his eyes and he tried to find the world they were supposed to go to.

The two just waited patiently, excitement clear in their eyes. "I'm going to be a ninja there, believe it! Nin, nin." Nian did some hand signs and she flipped the bird.

"You idiot, we should be mysterious experts that will give the protagonist a heaven defying treasure!" Ling was fantasizing and Ash smiled at the two.

"You read too much Xianxia, big sis. I can already see that you'll be the drunk that annoys the hell out of the protagonist, but you'll suddenly show your powers and they'll be all she is shaking heaven and earth!" Nian rolled her eyes.

"What? It's pretty fun." Ling pouted and Ash finished his preparations.

"Come on girls, let's go." He just lifted them up on their scruffs and threw them into the portal.

The trio went to another world and they found themselves in some yard with traditional Japanese buildings.

"Oof, hey Ash! What the hell are you doing? Throwing us to the portal like that?" Nian stood up with Ling and they dusted themselves off. They pouted at him and Ash just waved off their concerns.

"It's fine~ You two were too distracted." He shrugged and they looked around.

There were a couple of people around and Nian had stars in her eyes.

"Ahhh! These are the strongest weaklings called the haShitas right? The Cannon fodder that's hard to kill." Nian nodded sagely.

"Ohhh, they've definitely trained their frail bodies to the max! Such youth!" Ling was impressed with their regimens.

They just stared at them and they saw Ash who looked like a demon. Even more so than the ones they are fighting.

"A... A demon walking under the sun..." A pink haired girl mumbled, but everyone heard it and their shock made them freeze in place.

Ash just observed them and he saw a guy being surrounded by two girls with white hair, sporting shoulder length Hime cuts.

"Oi, blind dude. You're the leader here right? Can you tell us more about this place? Damn, you're ugly, what the fuck happened to your face man?" Ash winced and the gathered men and women took offense to that.

They drew their weapons and Nian just snapped her fingers, making them disappear like it wasn't even there in the first place.

"Wha?" A little boy wearing a plain black uniform squawked in surprise.

"Now, now, these young'uns definitely do not respect their betters." Ling put her arms behind her and shook her head.

Ash went to the black haired man with a heavily scarred face and put his massive arm on his shoulder.

"You deaf and mute too? Come on, we travelled here exactly to have an adventure here." Ash said with disappointment.

"Ahh... I am Ubayashiki Kagaya... Please have a seat." He ushered them inside the building.

Nian and Ling saw a little girl in a box, biting onto a piece of bamboo. She was observing them with interest and the dragons squealed upon seeing her.

"Ahhh! Aren't you a cute little demon? Who's the cute little demon, you are!" Nian lifted her up and she tilted her head in confusion.

"Ohhh, so that's this guy's sister eh? Let's help her a bit, poor kid." Ash snapped his fingers and put a permanent coating of energy on her so the sun won't burn her.

"Come on, come on, Ash just gave you a gift. You'll love it." Ling pulled her into the sunny area. "Nezuko! No!" Her brother cried out desperately, thrashing against his bindings.

Then when Ling pulled her into the sun, nothing happened. Making everyone's jaw drop.

"Hmm, sunbathing is good for you. Demons should do it more often really." Ash nodded and Nezuko blinked.

"Get off of Ubayashiki-sama!" A manlet with white hair and some scars on his face screamed at Ash.

"Wow, you're like a banshee. You've got a mean face kid. You probably don't get any action, crank one out. You're not you when you're horny and repressed. That's obvious roid rage." Ash waved him off.

"Why you!?" He was fuming, bristling like a cat. But Ash just can't take him seriously. He was smaller than Narcissa.

"Enough. Strangers, may we know your names and purpose?" Ubayashiki smiled pleasantly.

"Oh, we're just looking around. Find some cute demons. Give them some sunblock, especially that woman what's her name? Tamago? Tamayo? Whatever, so we can see you guys fight Michael Jackson!" Nian explained enthusiastically.

"Michael Jackson?" Ubayashiki tilted his head in confusion.

"You know? That guy who's in a suit and wears a nice hat? The lame demon overlord? What kind of demon is weak against the sun?" Nian huffed.

"You can't compare Michael Jackson to the demons in our place Nian. Those guys would destroy this place in just a day." Ash sighed.

"Uhhh, right. These haShitas would most likely all die to just a little group of Seaborne. I forgot that Michael Jackson is their biggest threat." Nian remembered.

"So, your purpose?" Ubayashiki looked at them again with a strained smile.

"Ahh, how about we give you some weapons? You guys need to compensate with weaponry right?" Nian nodded at them and she willed swords to appear.

It was also imbued with her energy, the energy of a deity that could snort at them the wrong way and they'd explode.

"Ara? But demons can only be killed by Nichirin swords." A girl with pupilless violet eyes gave a sweet and fake smile.

"Swing that thing against that tree, you'll see. It is a weapon that will help you defy the heavens! Muahahaha! Akh!" Nian was too into her role and she choked on her spit.

"Hey, I was supposed to be the mysterious expert. I thought you didn't want to do the Xianxia?" Ling pouted at her sister.

The violet eyed girl just took one of the swords and didn't really feel anything different from it. But when she did give a lackadaisical swing on a tree, an energy blade tore through the tree and the compound.

"Ahem, see?" Nian cleared her throat and nodded in satisfaction.

"Don't you think that's overpowered Nian? You'll mess up the plot! They need to have adversity! They'll be too weak, the powerscaling is skewed." Ash shook his head and sighed.

"Don't worry, we'll just let you make the demons stronger and fiercer then. Give them some cultivation, turn them into the demonic sect!" Ling countered and Nian nodded excitedly.

Ash sighed and they would definitely cause tons of trouble there. "Just keep it low key. Don't give them some amazing ones like dao of supreme slaughter or demonic blood devouring technique." He rolled his eyes.

__

Thanks for reading everyone, ciao.