Special Chapter : Sacrificial Tales

Once upon a time there was a little boy, named Michael, never felt any love nor affection from anyone. Neither did he knew his family.

The people from the orphanage claimed that his mother left him when he was a few days old and never showed her face here again. He was abandoned. Yet, he didn't feel any resentment towards her. He couldn't feel emotions to begin with. He just couldn't so he pretended by observing people and acting out what he saw. Just to avoid useless conversations. He pretended to be normal. Slowly, he was able to act out the appropriate reaction without any trouble in any given situation.

Suddenly one day, his so called mother came to take him home. He was 15 years old now. He thought he would feel something but unfortunately he couldn't. He did pretend. Pretended to cry as he hugged his mother and went home. Or else the kids at the orphanage would continue to bear another sort of resentment towards him.

Little did he know, his mother only came back for him for her own benefits. The boy wasn't clueless as he wasn't raised under protection of a family. He knew what the world was like but pretended to be clueless. That was the best way to survive in his view.

Just a few days of living with his mother, he found out what she was like. Her true colors made him think, "Maybe I could have been better off never knowing who my mother was." She had sent him away to join the war without his permission. Basically sold off. Hoping for his death to earn some sympathy and money. For a strange reason, his will to live was stronger. Which he wasn't able to understand. Eventually, he returned as one of the war hero, a year later.

He was awarded for his achievements by the one and only princess of the empire. Due to his weird resemblance to the princess, he later investigated and found out that she was his half sister as they shared the same mother. He didn't bother doing anything about the information. Since this so called sister had been known as a tyrant and yet she was the crown princess because of the Emperor's favor. He wondered, "If she bothered having mother in the palace, would my life have been a little easier?"

He doubted his thoughts and soon found the answer. He could have never found peace since his sister didn't seem like the type to care. After the emperor passed away, the civilians complained and rebelled against her. Somehow, Michael became the hero who slayed the princess, the tyrant who would have doomed the empire. Little did he know that, it was the start of his misfortunes.

He never thought of himself as unfortunate until he killed her. He couldn't sleep some nights. Something in him burned. He couldn't understand it. He had killed many in the war, that never made him feel this way then why was it this time? He pondered and pondered as the pain continued to grow.

Until one day, he killed somehow while trying to save another. His pain subsided and he soon understood what he felt was bloodlust. A desire to kill and kill.

He was slowly going insane. If people could see him in this state then he couldn't be considered a hero. And as if it was a fateful encounter, he soon found hid salvation. He felt like he saw a fairy appear before him and in a split second, all the agony he beared inside had died down.

The so called fairy's name was Inara. Even though she was a noble lady, she still roamed around the town filled with commoners. She didn't discriminate between the rich and the poor. She played around with children and sometimes helped those she could. Naturally, Michael's interest grew into curiousness to infatuation.

Inara used to see him sit around in silence. She assumed he suffered from headaches a lot. So slowly as he became a little open to her, she tried to help him the best way she could. He also began to follow her around to protect her and join her in what she did.

He loved seeing her smile and kindness so much. For a future with her, he finally decided to take the rewards he was promised for being a hero which he had previously rejected. Receiving a title and status, he thought he would be more closer to her now.

Like in a fairy tale, he had asked her to a dance while they were hiding from people who were busy celebrating, dancing and gossiping. She had said yes. Her gray like greenish-blue hair had a new kind of beauty that night in his eyes. They were both wearing white that night so while they shared a clumsy first dance. They had the most fun under the moonlit night. She loved the way his red eyes were not willing to let her out of sight even for a moment while he soon realized that he wasn't just infatuated about her. He finally understood a emotion called love that night as they continued to dance without the worries of etiquette and perfection. He finally slowly began to feel emotions, he didn't have to pretend anymore. But the happiness didn't seem to last long.

One day, everything fell apart without him ever finding out why. He tried to win her over but she never accepted him. Inara always just smiled and rejected Michael. But even that stopped soon enough. He began to think she didn't accept him because she saw his true side. His obsession began to show. He started to think if she wasn't his then why bother becoming anyone else's. Before he could even think about locking her up, Inara was found dead on her bedroom with a suicide note. He failed to understand how such a sunshine could take her own life like that.

He sat beside her grave a week straight after her burial. Lifeless eyes just staring at an empty space. He wanted to see her smile one last time. As he had lost all his purpose in life, his bloodlust began to grow. In the end, he decided to take his own life to end the agony. And to his misfortune, he woke up again as the little boy he was once. As anyone would be confused, he was too at first but slowly accepted this outcome. He changed many things as he behaved differently than his previous life but yet the outcome never changed. Inara never accepted his love and he kept failing to save the one and only love of his lifs from dying. His life kept repeating and starting over from that certain point of childhood everytime he died. He couldn't escape this loop. After trying a few things differently, he discovered his bloodlust problem begans after he kills Liliane. Even if he didn't kill him, she takes her own life. He just somehow manages to keep that little sanity he had in him.

Stuck in a loop with nowhere to go, he felt helpless and for the first time blamed the so called goddess of rebirth. The goddess who was enjoying giving him this curse. He never accepted or denied the facts of this so called goddess but now he wanted to deny it.

The goddess gave everyone a blessing. A gift they said that everyone has but not always can you unlock it. And Michael was sure that the goddess had given him a curse because she hated him. A being that was never loved even by the goddess, he thought.

As if to prove him wrong. Maybe the goddess played a role. A loop that began to go differently without his influence made Michael gain a little sanity. The so called sister was behaving differently than all the other lives he had lived and repeated. He just silently observed and to his surprise, for the first time she came for him. Before he could even feel that new kind of warmth he discovered in her, someone appeared to ruin the fun.

Something or someone always manages to ruin it for him and he forgot about it for a while. This time it was his mother who killed Liliane out of grief and anger. It was pitiful. This time when he held his dying sister's body, not as the murderer. He could see a lot of differences up close. He could notice the small details since he repeated this life so many times.

He smiled at his sister, "If I die this time, I wonder if you would be here for me again. This version of you."

Liliane just silently listened without fully being able to understand as her took her final breath. Carrying her in his arms with blood spilling all around the floor and his clothes he said, "Come for me a little sooner then, would you?" And took the soulless body to the new emperor with eyes full of tears.

If he knew the one he was carrying now was the one who created him just to abandon him without fulfilling his story then would he have had viewed her the same way? Lily sure didn't want to try and find out about it anytime soon.

[End of Part One]