Set 43

Lifting the hat

On the beach a man laid facing sky sunbathing with nothing to wear except a hat to cover his private to prevent others from turning on.

A bitch of a woman passes by and snarls, "A gentleman lifts a hat to a woman."

Man responds, "For a woman attractive Gentleman's Hat lifts by itself."

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Getting to know each other

A very rich man met a beautiful lady and he decided he wanted to marry her right away. She said, ''But we don't know anything about each other.'' He said,''That's all right, we'll learn about each other as we go along.''

So she consented, and they were married, and went on a honeymoon to a very nice resort. So one morning they were lying by the pool, when he got up off of his towel, climbed up to the 10-meter board and did a two and a half tuck gainer, this followed by a three rotations in jackknife position, where he straightened out and cut the water like a knife.

After a few more demonstrations, he came back and lay down on the towel.

''That was incredible!'' she said.

''I used to be an Olympic diving champion. You see, I told you we'd learn more about ourselves as we went along.'' So she got up, jumped in the pool, and started doing laps. After about thirty laps she climbed back out and lay down on her towel hardly out of breath.

''That was incredible!" he said. "Were you an Olympic endurance swimmer?''

''No,'' she said, ''I was a hooker in Venice and I worked both sides of the canal.''

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A Maharishi stated that Kamasutra sex is

"Duty", if done with your Wife

"Art", if done with your Lover

"Education", if done with a Virgin

"Business Transaction", if done with a Prostitute

"Social Work", if done with a Divorcee

"Charity", if done with a Widow &

"Sacrifice", if done with your own Hand.