Adorning a plain white T-shirt and a skinny jeans, I walked down to the main lobby of the hospital with my converse.
Being the abandoned little puppy that I was, I didn't have anything on me except my phone and wallet. Even these clothes that I wore were given by the nurse who took care of me.
If I remembered correctly, her name was Chun Yi. We didn't talk much during my stay here but her stories somehow eased my mind. It gradually became something that I needed to divert my attention.
I didn't know why she was kind to me or if she was paid by one of those demons to treat me well so that I owed her. But I was thankful to her kindness.
At least for me, I regarded her as a friend, even though I barely talked to her. Sometimes listening was more than enough.
I knew her story, her struggle, and her defiant attitude. She was a strong woman. A thousand times better than I had ever been.
Then again, I was just a sixteen years old girl. Well, I used to be...until now.
"Ms. Huang!"
I halted my steps in front of the exit and turned towards the source of the voice.
From the hallway on the right side of the reception desk, came Chun Yi as she made her way towards me.
She was panting when she arrived at my side. I wondered if it was that important to the point of chasing me down to the first floor. Whatever she had to say, she could just text me.
We managed to exchange our cellphone number before when she was delivering my lunch at one point.
"Phew...thank God you're still here." She exhaled a sigh of relief as she patted her chest. "I wanted to give you this."
She rummaged through her pocket and a golden bracelet appeared in her hand.
Under the sunlight, the bracelet glistened mesmerizingly, showing its brilliant elegance. It wasn't anything fancy. It was just a simple gold chain with a rose in the middle of it.
For Lifei perhaps it was only a common jewelry. But for me, who was just a sixteen years old deep down, I had never seen anything as beautiful as this.
"For you, Li Fei."
I looked up at her. Chun Yi was smiling gently at me. However, I kept my eyes on her. Until she finally realized the confusion steeled in my eyes.
"It's real gold," she said again.
I tilted my head. I knew it was real gold. But the question was why? Why did she give this beautiful bracelet to me? Did I even deserve it?
"It was my mother's," she continued.
Only then I shook my head and pushed her hand that held the bracelet back to her. I wouldn't take such precious momento. It was what was left of her mother.
"It's okay," she said as she reached for my hand. She put it on my palm. "I want you to have it because I consider you as my sister."
I stared blankly at her.
"Ms. Hua- I mean Li Fei. Right, Li Fei." She smiled.
I wished I could give her the same smile but I couldn't. I no longer had it in me. There was an endless list of why I was incapable. But none of them escaped my mouth.
Chun Yi took the bracelet and put it on me. She let out a satisfied smile when the bracelet finally settled around my small wrist.
"Li Fei, call me, okay? Whenever you need help or when you just want to talk. I'll be here. I know you may not trust me. But, I just want you to know that I'll be there if you call. I promise."
'I promise'.
It felt like a thousand needles jabbing into my heart. The last time someone made a promise to me, he ended up betraying that promise. And now, what was left of his promise was a cruel lie.
'I'll be there.'
Yet, another lie. Look at me, I had been calling their names several times every night when the nightmare came to haunt, but where were they?
I was still alone, wasn't I?
So, I wished she would stopped talking now, because I had enough of those empty words.
I would never believe again. I couldn't. I didn't have any piece of heart left to offer. No more soul to give. No more feelings to spare.
All that I could offer her now was only a token of formality in the form of "thank you" before I turned around and left the hospital.