CHAPTER 1: The Dreaming

First love. It's more of an unfathomable attraction. It's a sense that you and this person have a destiny, even if you're not sure whether it's love or something else. Love at first sight can occur not only when you see them, but also when you feel a connection with this person, even if you are speaking to each other from one end to the other.

[LUNCH TIME AT STARBUCKS]

"I believe that would be all for today's meeting. And before you all go, I expect everyone to participate in the future calls. To avoid wasting anyone's time, kindly let me know in advance if you are unable to pursue this freelance career, alright?"

"These are all noted, Ms. Marianette," the trainees responded altogether.

"Thank you for today. Have a great day ahead everyone." Just as the video call meeting ended, I received my ordered drink served by the barista which I thanked.

Before having a sip of my drink, I opened up my Spotify account and played one of my favorite songs of the Korean boy group, Monsta X, which is entitled Heaven.

I'm almost in my thirties, so my colleagues couldn't help but question me whenever they see me listening to K-pop songs. They would always say I'm such a geek or a fanatic who never moves on.

Some of them also said that I'm too old to listen to songs like that. But, I ignore them as always. I'm an introvert, and I don't give a shit about what people around me think of me and what I do.

I enjoy my own company, mostly when I'm alone. However, there's one thing different from me.

My music listening was soon interrupted when I received a video call invitation from my friends whom I met a few years ago after I got into Monsta X's fandom called Monbebe.

"OH MY GOSH, YOU GUYS! I MISSED YOU SO MUCH!" Helena, whom we call Lena, greeted. "Thank you for accepting the call, by the way."

Lena is one of my friends who has been stanning Monsta X for the same number of years as me. She's very friendly and outgoing. I first met her online and she was so kind as to share with me the live streaming of Monsta X concert which she paid $45 for.

I still haven't paid her yet, but I will. I'm still broke and she understands it. She's compassionate to others, but sometimes she gets a little horny for being too loving and friendly. I don't know why I suddenly brought that up.

"Hey there, everyone. How are y'all doing in your respective places?" Olivia, whom we call Liv, followed.

Liv is one of my friends who began stanning Monsta X a year earlier than Lena and me. She's the eldest based on birth month and works office-based. She's the mood maker of the group, and I like the sound of her laugh every time. It's just lifting my spirits up to have a good day ahead.

"Hello, babies. Sorry for, like, disappearing most of the time. There's just too many things happening in my life and the world is too fast for me..." Destiny, she prefers to be called Dez, is one of our friends as well who stan Monsta X. She works as an English private tutor.

She's the sweetest among us and could be the quietest. I just love having her presence, whether online or not. She brings me peace.

"Lena babe! I told you to call last night, I was so fuckin' horny and I don't have anyone to help me!" Last but not the least, our friend Sequoia who is willing to be called Soya as her nickname. Just like me, she works as a freelancer but in photography.

I don't know how to begin with her. Let's just say she's the horniest between her and Lena, or maybe it's the other way around. Seriously, whenever she flirts with Lena in our group chat, I feel like wanting to hide. But, it doesn't mean I hate them for being like that. I actually enjoy the way they do things and entertain us.

Anyway, Soya is kind of sweet and gets flattered every time she gets praised or being told that they love her. I don't see anything wrong with that mostly if the person was really used to gaining so much love.

"What's up and you suddenly called?" I asked Lena before taking a sip of my coffee.

"Do you know what's coming up next, next week?" Lena asked.

"Nope," Dez replied.

"No idea," Liv also replied.

"Oh yes, I'm cumming, Lena..." Soya answered, which rendered us speechless.

I was expecting Lena to respond back, but I think she was also stunned by what we just heard. But, she just shook her head and continued with her topic.

"Yo, guys! It's almost Monbebe day!" Lena exclaimed after the awkward silence that just occurred. "Did you forget?"

"For real?!" Liv exclaimed as well. "Why did I even forget that? God. I should have taken a vacation."

"I actually know that it's Monbebe day already next week, but I just let Lena announce since she's the host for today," Dez said.

"Well, thank you, Dez! Love you," Lena said. "So, now that you know, I need you babes to clear up your schedule for next week and the week after..."

"Why?" Soya asked.

"Because we are going to Monsta X's Seoul Concert!"

As soon as Lena made the announcement, the video calls were filled with excitement and screams that almost busted my eardrums.

"Are you serious, Lena?!" Soya questioned. "Is this the moment where I get to see the love of my life, LEE MINHYUK?!"

"Hey! I thought I'm your only LOML?!" Lena questioned her back.

"Seriously, babes. I'm so excited but I'm too stunned to react like you all do," Dez shared with us.

"I'm gonna cry for real! I will be seeing my Honey!" Liv started laughing and crying at the same time. I don't even know anymore.

"Alright, calm down. Let's all fuckin' calm down and breathe. I don't want you guys passing away even before we get to fly in Seoul next week-"

I almost spit my coffee after hearing what Lena just said, then I immediately called her attention.

"Bestie, what do you mean flying to Seoul next week?" I asked her in curiosity.

"Do not panic. It's organic." Lena remarked with her palms facing us and in front of the camera. "Yours truly had her team in collaboration with Monsta X's event organisers in Seoul! And we all got VIP tickets for the concert!"

"Free of charge?" Soya asked.

"FREE OF CHARGE!!!" Lena screamed on top of her lungs after getting up from her seat and she also began jumping in her room that was witnessed by us in the video call.

Because of the continuous excitement caused by the announcement, Liv couldn't avoid it and left the call after informing us that she needed to cry first. While Dez told us she'll be getting her luggages ready, same as Soya.

Therefore, I was only left in the video call with Lena.

"Hey, Arin. You don't seem excited at all," she told me calmly. "Are you being true to yourself right now after hearing everything I said?"

"When did I even become dishonest to myself?" I asked her as I put down the cup and proceeded with my freelance job using the laptop.

"Let me think," Lena pouted. "Oh, right when you said that you stopped being a Monbebe, two years ago."

I sighed. "Lena, I do. I stopped because I had no choice. The reality of life is hitting me so hard that I had to let go of being their fan."

"I don't believe you. You merely stopped because you already had a boyfriend," she said. "I thought it would always be Changkyun."

"Are you even listening to yourself? A fan and a celebrity is impossible to be together. Not with all the delusional fans existing who will kill you with just their idols trying to look at you," I replied to her.

"I don't care. I dreamt of seeing Kihyun, you know that. I couldn't get a hold of the tracks anymore of how long I have been in love with that man, like if forever is real, I would stay single for him," Lena explained. "I'm not saying that you should do it too. But, as your friend, I know deep in your heart that you wanted to be with Changkyun."

"Which is impossible, Lena..."

"Arin, don't you believe in fate? In destiny?"

"No," I replied.

She sighed in disappointment.

"Think about it. This concert is the chance for us to meet Monsta X. VIP tickets for free? Don't you think of it as a gift from heaven?" she continued asking.

"Lena, I can't do this anymore. Let's stop this conversation because whether you like it or not, I can't come with you ladies because I'm no longer in the fandom," I told her as I began to clean up my space. "I have something more important to do than standing in front of people who don't even know I exist."

Before Lena could even respond to me, I quickly ended the call, turned off my laptop and put it inside my bag. Then, I walked out of the coffee shop.