A girl with a broken soul

(Psyche)

I' m standing on the flat form area in the women aisle at the train station, waiting for the train to come.

As usual this morning was the same as the other mornings everyday, no special happenings from previous night.

I was a night shifter, I'm working as call center agent in an international company in this prestigious city.

I put my headset on and listen to one of my favorite song of my favorite band. while wondering for the future.

I always dreamed to be the best, but end up being a loser.

I feel like crying at the moment. I don't know what to do. there's a lot of things running in my mind, deadlines, quotas, etc. and I have a lot of plans, but I don't know how to start a new one.

I want to achieve all of them, but I don't know how to do it. they said that there is always a way on everything, but for me, how can I find a way if I only have one choice?, and that is to live for other people's dream and forget my own.

I wonder what destiny would like to throw at me in this life. I hope that could be good.

I'm a princess in my own fantasy world, but a pauper in the real world.

I wonder when my prince charming will come, and sweep me off my feet, but I doubt that would ever happen.

I can feel the void inside me, longing for something to fill in, but I couldn't find it.

Then i saw the train coming, It stop. In front of me the door opens, Passengers are going out, as I walk and trail the people going inside, I'm like a walking body without life.

My eyes are set out the train glass window, and my mind was traveling to a different dimension, my own dimension. while listening to the music on my phone.

In my own world, I am perfect, I have everything.

It is a fifteen minutes journey but It's like forever, I get to be happy on my imagination while on the train, until it reached the last station.

As i walk fast from the people beside me, I look the same as the busy bodies who are rushing to the second train. while my mind is pondering to somewhere else, what a multi task!?, like an idiot I smiled to my self.

I passed by a lot of passengers who are waiting for the morning train. "maybe this one is a good day for me" I thought again. because there are few people, not like the other day. At least i'm not going to be stressed for the crowd today.

I walk on my empty heart on the women aisle at the left side of train flat form area, as if no one is around I stand there quietly. Until the train arrives and I walk inside. I found a seat for me, and sit down comfortably, while lazily leaned at the window frame behind me, then i close my eyes.