Journey Into Cocytus VI

"Hnn…" the faint groan of sleep crept from Raizo's lips as he slowly stirred awake.

"Hahh…" he let out another noise before he nuzzled against something…

"Unyaa~" a coquettish tone of voice escaped from nowhere.

"Eh?" the youth paused as the sound instantly caused his mind to become alert.

"Mm..yah…tic…kles…" the voice continued whilst the youth attempted to move around.

"What is…this…warmth…and why do I feel so…stuck?" he murmured.

The male tried to move his body again but found himself unable to do so.

"What the hell is going on? It's…too dark…I can't see anything. This familiar…soft sensation is pressing against my face…and my upper body. And there's a warm sensation coming from behind me too. Hey…what's that smell? It's…kinda nice actually…I don't feel so tense…"

The boy's thoughts were scattered between confusion and relaxation as another voice called out.

"Fufu…ara, ara, are you enjoying yourself?" a seductive tone leaked out tickling the boy's ears.

"E-Eh….wait…"

"Shhh, let me give the room a little light," the feminine voice suggested shortly before a small candle on the wall came to life. The orange flame began to gently illuminate the room like the earliest crack of sunlight at dawn.

"Good Morning, Raizo-kun~"

"G-Garuda? W-What are you doing here?" the male asked noticing how close he was to her. It was then that he adjusted his gaze down and noticed what was in front of him: her soft, naked breasts.

"Ehhh?!! W-Why are you naked?!"

She then placed a finger over his lips.

"Keep your voice down, I'm not the only one here, yes?"

In that moment, the male felt something pulling on him from behind before the warmth against his back intensified. Narrowly turning his head to look, he caught a glimpse of the body silhouette belonging to Morana. One of her hands slid up the side of his body as she suddenly pulled him close to her. A certain warm sensation grinded against his back which caused Raizo to blush, he knew exactly what was pressing on him.

"Wh-what…the…"

"Ara, ara, Morana-nee seems to be smothering you from behind. I suppose I can continue spoiling you from here then," Garuda declared as she drew close once again, her breasts gently pushing up against Raizo's face.

"You can still breathe, yes?"

"M-Mou…R-Rudy...wh-what are you doing in my futon?!" the male managed to utter.

"You mean you do not remember? I suppose that drink really hit you. Truly I am surprised," the Yakshini chuckled innocently.

"I…feel like that indicates I did something wrong…"

"No, no, nothing too serious. You just took a little swig of a drink that was perhaps way too strong for your delicate palate. I suppose you have not been exposed to alcoholic drinks before. Reaching for a cup churned by the Oni tribes is truly brave of you, yes?"

"E-Eh? I…I thought I had tea or something…"

"You did, but then you grabbed a sakazuki cup filled with the strongest elixir-like wine at the banquet unsuspectingly. Instantly you were out cold. Morana-nee and I had to carry you inside since the festivities were drawing to an end~"

"Wait…how does a soul get drunk? Or whatever the hell I am right now? That doesn't make any sense!"

"Between my elixir and the Sovereign's 'pardon', you can essentially forget that your soul is an unconventional existence. Silly boy~"

"I...don't even remember doing that…mou, Rudy, you better not be teasing me about this."

"Ara, ara, maybe just a little bit. You did happen to take a little sip of a certain drink, but your energy reserve still isn't at an optimal point yes? So after the party ended, you were brought here."

"Okay…but that still doesn't explain why you're here?!"

"I decided to channel some of my mana into your body. The best way to do that was by direct skin on skin contact."

"Wait…that means I'm…"

The boy hesitantly looked under the covers for a moment and realized he was completely naked.

"A-Again?! And…with two women no less, one of which I barely know…mou…what is this?"

"For what it's worth, I didn't do anything lewd to you. I was tempted to inspect, but I kept my hands to myself…mostly…it was fun cuddling you all night as you directed, yes~"

"W-What…is that supposed to mean?"

"You did say something along the lines of: 'Hold me close, 'Onee-sama' at one point."

"I…see…" the male uttered with a bittersweet expression.

"Yes, you cried out for her. Morana-nee was telling me about it when it first occurred after we brought you to the room. Hard to believe you had such a close relationship with the Goddess-Above-All, yes…"

"….." Raizo remained silent at that point.

"On a lighter note, Onee-chan was against my staying here even with my explanation. I was worried I would have to beg, but she seemingly understood the necessity of this situation. Of course she said she would monitor by joining us in this predicament," Garuda chuckled to lighten the boy's mood.

"So…are you enjoying yourself? Is my body's softness to your liking? My thick, full curves, my supple breasts, my plump hips, the perfectly voluptuous body, don't you think?" the Sorceress inquired as she grinded her body against the youth whilst running her fingers through his head.

"Ara, ara, you'll have to forgive me. It would seem that I can't help myself with you at this point. Perhaps we should…"

"You seem to be having fun taking advantage of my Master, Rudy-chan," the voice of a certain queen then interrupted the moment.

"My, my, it would seem that Onee-chan is awake now, yes?"

"Goodness, I knew I was going to come to regret allowing you to do this with the boy. You dare attempt to steal what belongs to your Queen while she slumbers?"

"Oh? Calling this boy yours now? Are you confessing your feelings for your master now that he can feel your true body?"

The two women passed fierce gazes at one another as their naked bodies loomed overhead of the youth. As he looked up, Raizo could see nothing but their shapely breasts, soft body lines, and smooth skin. Such visual stimulation caused his chest to stir, he was uncertain whether to be embarrassed…or…feel something more carnal at this point.

"C-Could…both of you please cover up? This…feels so embarrassing and wrong. I'm not sure my heart can handle this," he spoke shyly.

"Apologies Raizo-kun," Garuda said whilst retreating a bit.

"Yes, Rai-san…such a childish display is unbecoming of me," Morana confessed.

"It would seem that Onee-chan recognizes me as a rival in love, yes?"

"E-Eh? L-Love? What are you talking about? Surely you jest. I merely have protective concerns over my master and what women wander into his life. Y-You have only known him for all of five minutes it would seem. Do you not think you are moving too fast?"

"My, that tsundere side of yours is strong. To answer your question, I suppose it would be easy to blame my Yakshini nature…the last thing I would want is Raizo-kun to think badly of me with how forward I am being. Perhaps I have pushed my luck, yes?"

The eyes of the women turned to the youth in that moment causing him to blush again.

"It's not like…I'm offended or anything. I-I guess that…love at first sight thing exists or whatever. Besides….you already told me how Yakshini are with affairs of the heart so…I'm not mad at you. I just…don't think of myself as special, that's all. Tch…I'm not good at these things with women and all…but…if…you feel that way about me then…I don't know, I'm just not upset about it I guess," the male fumbled around over his words as he grabbed a pillow to cover his face.

"Master…you…" Morana pondered to herself before closing her mouth to keep her comment to herself. She turned her gaze towards her best friend's face. To her surprise, the Yakshini was looking down as her hair draped over her face. That did not stop her from seeing the tears fall down her cheek.

"Garuda…" she murmured, "Link for a second…"

Suddenly a subtle translucent aura resonated between the two as their minds synced together.

"Morana-nee…how can someone so pure be condemned to such a place? While I am truly grateful for the chance to meet this boy, I cannot help but to be saddened by his unfortunate circumstance… especially at this point."

"Your heart is in turmoil, is it not my dear little sister? You feel empathy for this child, yet your truest nature does not wish for you to mourn for his current situation because it is filled with another emotion. After all these long millennia, you managed to find him…one that you were looking for. But you are scared of acknowledging it."

"Yes…yes, you are truly correct. I should not be allowed to feel this way right now…but I can't help it. I did not want this to happen, not so fast. I wanted to remain unsure, but that part of me solidified it. If only he was in his true body, perhaps I would not feel what I am feeling right now. Alas, that part of me was able to resonate with his because he is only a soul…why? Why me?"

"You truly managed to fall in love, and you are too scared to admit it. It is okay, Garuda. You can feel that emotion."

"Can I? We Yakshini sisters—the daughters of the Goddess of Gravity, Durga—numbering 36 in all were meant to be the perfection representation of beauty when it came to women. Each of us was given the power to love, but in a way that could be perceived as gift and a curse. Ironically enough, our method of loving another person was just a cruel joke played on us by our mother. Because the strongest force of gravity above all was love itself and she cast it out of her and into us; me, being the youngest and also the strongest, had the most potent blend of it. I managed to control it for decades, denying its impulse, confident that it would not break me, that I would one day see my mother's face and do the world a favor by making sure she could not hurt another soul. Yet look at me, I have fallen in love with the unobtainable…of all people, why did it have to be this boy?"

"Because he is a lot like you…a broken soul needing to be mended together again unable to do it alone. You are kindred spirits whom have known a lifetime of struggle wondering if all the things you done, and all the things done to you would allow you to have a happy life. Dear sister, you found someone who was just like you and can understand you better than you ever could on your own. Your heart is telling you that he is the one. And it is okay…because regardless of how I may feel about him, I recognize that passion flowing through you right now."

"It wouldn't work Morana-nee; he has…more than enough on his plate. He has women like you in his life too, along with whoever else is waiting for him on the other side. Plus given my position here, there is no way I could be worthy of him. I would only be in his way, yes…"

"Stop making excuses and let your heart be free."

"But…"

"I know you are afraid. You are worried that you shall wind up like your other sisters: rejected, abandoned, betrayed, and so on. Loving someone takes courage. The only way to know where the road leads is to chase it no matter what. Love may be dangerous, but it is also beautiful. I am sure a certain maiden would agree if she were here."

"Yes…" Garuda nodded whilst taking a moment to wipe her tears.

"Though I am afraid she would perhaps try to pounce on him herself."

"You make a valid point, Rudy-chan. If I may inquire, what pushed you to this point with my Master? I anticipated it would happen, but I am still curious."

"The words he spoke…I…never felt such sincerity with his words. The pureness of his soul is clearly communicated to me. Though he may not think himself to be, this child is truly beautiful down to the core of his being. How…could I resist someone like that? If the curse of love from my mother is truly like gravity, then everything I am cannot help being pulled to him."

"See? I knew you could be true to yourself if given the chance."

"Yes, Onee-chan…I know he is your master…but I…"

"Relax, this boy is too dense to realize it now, but he will likely have more than one relationship going on. If I am able to leave this place and he is able to return home, the bed will have to be much bigger to accommodate everyone."

"Ara, ara, how kinky. I have some potions that could make such nights even more exciting, yes…"

"R-Rudy-chan…he still needs more training in regards to women, and those things are…"

"I have several books on such topics that he can study."

As the two audibly chuckled for a moment, the male removed the pillow from his face for a second.

"Why'd it get so quiet only for you two to start laughing?" he asked suspiciously before raising an eyebrow.

"A-And why haven't you two covered up yet? Mou…this is just…so wrong…"

The two girls looked at one another with raised eyebrows for a second. Morana shrugged her shoulders before nodding in an approving motion.

"Ara, ara, such an adorable boy. We were just having a little conversation about a private matter. But I do have something to tell you, yes," Garuda responded whilst leaning down towards the youth.

"Eh? What is it, Ru—"

It was in that moment that the Yakshini placed her arms over the youth's head. Her massive breasts swayed beneath her before she pressed them against his chest.

"Raizo-kun, I have decided…"

"W-What?"

"My heart cannot deny it anymore. I tried to withhold it for your sake. I figured it would be too much for you, even though I played with the notion over the past few days. Forgive me for succumbing to my nature…but it appears that I have indeed fallen for you."

The moment Raizo went to open his mouth in reaction to this, Garuda pressed her lips over top of the boy's as the squelching noises from their lips mashing against each other echoed out. After a brief, yet seemingly lengthy 10-second time period, the witch pulled away.

"I want to be yours, Raizo Mercer…"

"I…um…"

The former Stormbringer had muddled thoughts. He was unsure what to currently think. It was not the first time that someone had confessed to him, so it should be easy for him to accept them or just casually sidestep them. Yet for some reason, he was at a pure loss of what to do.

"I feel obligated to say something at least," he said to himself mentally.

"I…feel humbled that you think that way of me, Garuda-san…er…Rudy. When I find a way back to my body…we'll revisit this, okay? I would rather feel whole…than to accept your feelings the way I am now," the youth concluded with a smidge of confidence to contrast against his rose-tinted cheeks.

"Ara…it would seem you are prepared to accept me then. My, my, then I shall double my efforts to make sure you get back to your body. Then I can visit you in bed once more to…negotiate," she smirked seductively in response.

"Okay now, you can stop bullying my Master already," Morana chimed in.

"Onee-chan, why interrupt my lovey dovey time with my new honey? Mou…is it because you wish to enjoy your time with him as well? After all, you are also soul mates."

"W-What? R-Rudy-chan, do not be absurd. My devotion to Rai-san is one of a mutually beneficial partnership. W-We are comrades. Surely you do not think that…"

"Be honest with yourself, my esteemed sister. When was the last time you were able to enjoy yourself as a woman? Do you not look at this young man with a certain atmosphere of longing? Though unconscious, fighting alongside one another forged a relationship that is on a different level of strength. Then there is also that other thing between you…"

"Rudy-chan, hush right now! He is not ready for that…you speak too much now…foolish Sorceress…" Morana blushed whilst folding her arms and casting a gaze off to the side; during that time, Raizo went to sit up as Garuda pulled away.

"Morana, what's going on? What other thing?" the male asked.

"It is nothing…nothing right now that is. I shall tell you when the time is right."

"I…see…then…what about this longing ordeal? I…um…"

"It is nothing, Master, you be quiet too!"

"…Fine…"

The youth reached out and patted the female on the head gently.

"There, there. We'll always be partners. You've saved my life more than once…and I did feel as if you were watching over me the moment I took hold of that weapon."

Morana smiled softly on the inside whilst glancing off to the side, then she cleared her throat before speaking.

"Anyways, shall we get dressed now? I wish to begin doing something today with this young man."

"Oh my…gonna wine and dine?" Garuda chuckled.

"D-Do not be ridiculous," Morana coughed once more, "Ensure that all of the affairs of today's schedule are taken care of. Today I shall be training my master."

"Eh?! Training? But I have like…no powers or a body to really do anything."

"You do have a body; you just do not understand how to properly make use of it. The ethereal vessel is in some ways stronger than the body of flesh. I am going to begin teaching you some things that may prove beneficial to your future encounters when we leave this place."

With that, Raizo could only afford to nod as the trio got up from their futon and prepared for the day to come. After taking about an hour to get ready for the day and enjoying a nice, subtle yet hearty breakfast, Morana, Raizo and Garuda headed down to the third floor of the castle.

Upon entering the space, the room was a large open area arranged like a traditional dojo with hardwood floors. The walls were a blank canvas for the most part. One side of the dojo held a wooden carving of wolves gathered together to form a pack, the other side was that familiar tree that was seen on the other floors. The last wall held a massive banner with a singular slogan of advice written in unique calligraphy: "Be one with the sword, your will is the blade that weaves your destiny."

As the trio entered the space, the young male in the black and white karate gi merely observed his surroundings. He was hit by a wave of nostalgia from when he trained with Akame. Morana briskly walked past wearing similar vestments except with a shrine maiden's style whilst Garuda entered wearing a lavender kimono taking a seat over on the far side to observe. The Sovereign went over towards a rack in the corner of the room and pulled out two wooden swords to use before approaching the boy.

"Pay attention, Rai-san. It is time that I train you how to fight in your current state," the woman instructed before tossing one of the weapons to him.

"Eh? What do you mean? Just because I don't have a body so to speak doesn't mean I forgot how to fight," Raizo responded upon catching the weapon in hand.

"So you think, but in reality, you need to be taught at least some basics to ground yourself. Even though you have an ethereal vessel, your existence technically lies on a separate layer of reality. When you were sent to Purgatory, you were removed from the physical plane. You were even removed from the astral plane hence why Nirvana cannot come to you. Furthermore, the loss of Indra's abilities has all but made you completely human again. After many months of fighting with enhanced physical abilities and supernatural powers, your muscle memory may have forgotten some of the core mechanics of just possessing regular strength. Yet since your experiences through various life-or-death scenarios have been hard etched into the very core of your existence, you may possess a unique form of strength. Either way, we must refine it."

"Basically what you're saying is…I've been nerfed significantly and reset yet the battles I've endured may have left some perks on my soul that allow me to comprehend at least a slither of what I knew before. And you essentially want me to bring that out because there's no telling if I'll ever get my powers back."

"Yes, Rai-san…that is correct. In addition, if there ever comes a day when you have no choice but to fight in Cocytus, I want to make sure you are able-bodied enough to do so. Now then…"

Morana twirled the wooden blade around in her hand for a brief period before standing perfectly still. Her legs spread apart by about two feet whilst extending the weapon out to the side. To the untrained eye, she was standing virtually unguarded; thus rendering herself to become an easy target for the simplest of attacks. However, the expressionless yet focused look she carried suggested otherwise.

Raizo tightened his grip on the wooden weapon for a moment as he looked over the shiny wooden finish of the surface. It felt weird in his hand, like something was off for him. He was unsure what to make of that feeling, but it gave him an air of doubt.

"It…does feel like I don't know how to hold this thing. What the hell is this?"

As the youth held the blade with both hands, he slid one leg forward while keeping one back—a traditional sword stance. In that moment, the male rushed forward with his weapon to make the opening attack.

"Wait…why do I feel so slow? Hang on…"

Just as he went to make the first swing, Morana simply stepped towards her left before flipping her weapon towards the other direction and swinging it upward in a diagonal fashion like a bat. The youth's sword was deflected out of his hands before she tripped the boy with her right leg and slammed him to the ground on his belly.

"O-Ow…." He protested in pain.

"Too easy, try again," she commanded as she gave him space to recover whilst walking over to recover his weapon before tossing it to him.

Raizo took a stance once more, this time electing to lower his center of gravity by bending his knees and angling the wooden blade over his left arm. As he slowly inched his way towards the woman, he felt shakiness in his hands.

"What the hell is wrong with me? Why do I feel so anxious… this isn't like me at all…"

Snapping out of his thoughts, the youth pressed forward once again aiming straight for the woman's midsection. Morana slithered her body in a snaking motion to evade the horizontal slashes before meeting the forward press with her blade to parry the strike. Stumbling back on his feet for a second, Raizo whipped his arm around with his sword in hand to attack from the opposite side which caused the Sovereign to counter again. A brief exchange occurred for 5 strikes only for the long-haired beauty to bat Raizo's blade away once more. This time she knocked him back by swiftly jabbing the boy's abdomen with the butt of her sword.

The exercise repeated around ten or so times before the male was laid out on the floor, his eyes staring at the ceiling rendered out of breath and strength. Morana sighed heavily as she walked over towards him only to crouch down. Garuda merely remained silent whilst watching the entire thing.

"Do you understand now? You are unable to land a decisive blow even when I purposely left myself open for a basic attack. In about 20 exchanges, there were at least 2 distinct angles of attack that I purposely left unguarded for you to capitalize on; however, you never once even remotely grazed them. In fact, you stumbled around with haste which rendered you wide open for simple counterstrikes. Though I am not surprised by this, I am rather disappointed," the Queen expressed.

"Guess…I really am useless without my powers. Heh…though it's not like I was expecting much out of our little routine…I was hoping that I still had some form of rhythm. Maybe I didn't learn anything after all from my training efforts," Raizo sighed.

"It is not that you have not learned anything, it is because you are being weighed down by something…something that you have only felt on occasion and very rarely acknowledged," she explained.

"I saw it too, yes…" Garuda analyzed from afar, "Raizo-kun, I could see your broken steps from here you know. And I am not even a swordswoman…"

"Indeed. Rai-san, my dear Master, your movements were full of fear. It was as if you were expecting something bad to occur which made you doubt every single action you took."

"Fear…eh? Yeah…maybe that is the case…but…I don't know why I'm so afraid. I'm already dead so…what's the point?"

"It is from Indra and Goetia is it not? That last vestige of a fighting spirit within you was smothered by their trickery. Your soul remembers the feeling of being ripped from your body. Add on the nightmares you endured upon entering this domain, and you have a potent cocktail. A part of you believes that no matter how hard you fight, you will never win in the end," the Queen of Cocytus explained. Raizo merely turned his gaze away in shame before yielding a nod.

"Then that is where we must start. I must teach you how to let go of that fear. Only then can you reclaim the warrior within. The banner in this room says it all. You must be one with your sword. You cannot experience that harmony if your heavy heart weighs the steady blade. Akame-san taught you this, did she not? Therefore, the path before you is clear. In order to be prepared to face the potential war to come, you must win the war that is up here in your mind."

"So…does that mean I'm going to finally banish away the nightmares I endured?" the boy asked with a hopeful expression.

"You can delay how much they affect your actions; however, the torment endured by the visions you saw cannot be conquered overnight. You may place them at bay while you are here, but they can come back to haunt you at any point in time…especially in the real world."

"Oh…" the boy expressed in disappointment.

"Yes, but for now, we shall meditate. That is the perfect place for us to start. We shall be training everyday too so be prepared."

"Right…"

"I'm rooting for you, Raizo-kun~" Garuda playfully winked at the male from afar.

"No distractions, Rudy-chan," Morana raised an eyebrow.

"My, my, I shall not interfere with your special time with your Master, don't worry, yes?" the Sorceress chuckled.

"Mou…" both Raizo and Morana uttered simultaneously causing the Yakshini to laugh even harder.

"Two tsunderes….this is too much, yes."

The pair could only afford to try their best to refocus on the task at hand. It was a long road ahead and conflict could threaten the realm at any time. As a result, preparation would be the key to survival.

The intensive training lasted for hours on end. By the end of it, Raizo found himself bumbling around the palace before resting in a library area where by happenstance he found a brush filled with ink and blank paper. Surmising that this was used to document occurrences in Cocytus, the male took a few sheets and sat down to write a letter.

"I know they will never be able to see this but…" the male said aloud at the time before beginning to write:

´´To My Family,

It's been some time I imagine. There's never a single moment where I don't think about you guys. I don't know how long I've been dead, but it just feels like I'm in a bad dream that I'm unable to wake up from. I don't know why I'm writing this letter from beyond the sea of death…but…on the off chance that you're able to see it, I just wanted to let you guys know that you are in my heart even now.

Aniki, you're probably the one trying to be the strongest for the group, holding everything together so that everyone has someone to fall back on for support. It's okay to cry. You taught me that sometimes the pain that accumulates in our hearts becomes too much and we just have to let it out somehow. I'm not asking you to cry over me or anything, but I'm just letting you know that it's okay to let yourself feel sorrow. You can't be strong all the time. You're just as much as a human being as everyone else. You have a heart, perhaps the biggest one I've ever seen.

Aka-sensei, I have a feeling you're mad at me. I let my emotions get in the way of everything you taught me so far hence why I'm in the situation I'm in. I hope you can forgive me. I just wanted to make amends for something I felt like I caused. In that moment, I wanted you guys to place all your bets on me, to believe that I could fix the wrongs I created with one decisive move. I wanted to showcase the fruits of everything each of you instilled in me…but once again, I failed. I'm sorry. I'll never forget any of the things you taught me. You were an amazing teacher.

Addy, I feel like a failure as man when it comes to you. You poured your heart out to me on more than one occasion and tried so hard to prove yourself worthy of my affection from time to time. Allow me to say this, you were always worthy regardless of me being your chosen one or not. Even when we were kids, I knew that there was something about you that was blinding to me. You never had to prove anything, I just felt unworthy of you. I regret not discussing this with you…or just spending more time together with you in general. I can only pray that you find the happiness you deserve, even without me in the picture.

Vesta, I never thought you and I would become so close. Call it the Stormbringer bond or whatever, but I didn't think we'd love each like we did. I admired you Vesta...you were stronger than I could ever hope to be. It's up to you to take my place now. You have to be the wolf now in the pack that is Team AKARA. I entrust everything to you. I hate to leave you behind without bonding more…but, I believe in you.

Inari, we didn't know each other very well, yet I still hold a lot of respect for you. They say that you can always see the depth of a person by the look of their eyes. Looking into yours, I could tell you had a grand story to tell. I regret that I was not able to hear it. Hell…I wanted to go to Mercury to see what your people were like and where you came from as an individual. But alas…such is fate. Take care of Adena…and…if it comes down to it…you have my blessing with her…you and Vesta both. I wish you sincere happiness, Your Highness.

Mom, Dad, if you're also able to read this then…I'm sorry I won't be able to come home for dinner. We didn't have a lot of time to spend together as a family. There was still so much to learn about what it meant to be a Mercer. But I never knew what it was like to have real parents—to have two distinctive figures in my life to love me for who I am and embrace me. You gave me a home, a reason to believe that I truly had a place to belong to…something I thought I didn't have outside of Team AKARA. I just wish I could have been the son that you would have liked to have.

Last…but certainly not least…

Kimiko, my…Onee-sama…I've…never really known what it was like to truly love someone. I mean…I thought I knew, but…you…it literally felt like you pulled my heart out of my chest and claimed it as your own. I…I felt like there was never a moment in which I didn't feel like I belonged to you. Even when I disappointed you, I…still only wanted you. I could go on and on describing how much you mean to me…how much you gave me a reason to have faith in myself. There's just no other way of saying it: I love you. Even now as I feel like I could fade from existence at any given moment, there is nothing but unrivaled joy in thinking of you. Just so you know, I did see your face in my final moments…I never thought I'd ever see your tears before…not like that. And…to the other you…THAT part of you…just know, I don't blame you. I don't hate you…in fact, if it was my time then so be it. I only hoped that I became the man you wanted me to be.

With that, I can only hope that this letter is enough for me to say goodbye to all of you. I love you guys so much…and I thank you all for being a part of my life; for helping me strive to become a better me. I wish I could come back, but alas, we all have to move on. The pain may last, but I'm sure it'll get easier. I'll be watching over you all whenever I'm allowed to pass on. Thank you for everything, and for loving someone like me.

You will always be…my family,

Raizo Mercer``