Prologue

2019, May 20th, Monday.

The end of spring and the start of summer.

During this period, the day and night temperature in Jiangnan District fluctuated drastically. During the day, one would sweat buckets in thin clothing, but during the night, one would tremble under even a thick blanket.

Jiangnan College Town.

At 2:30 pm in the afternoon, students should attend classes, and yet Song Shuhang was alone in the dormitory with his laptop set on the desk next to him, allowing him to watch movies while in bed.

Song Shuhang wasn't someone fond of skipping lessons. The weather yesterday during the first half of the night was extremely hot and stuffy, resulting in him executing a 'Dragon Roaring Kick' and making the quilt fly away; in the latter half of the night, the temperature dropped sharply, and Shuhang who only had small underpants on him had suffered. During his sleep, both his hands were strenuously groping about in search for his blanket, but alas, he was unable to find it, shrinking like a shrimp and trembling under the tyrannical cold night wind.

When the sun rose, he had already become a member of the seasonal flu army. His roommates had helped him apply for leave for the day's lessons; afterwards, he took some cold medicine before sleeping until now.

Although his fever had subsided, his body still felt weak and he was not in a proper state to attend lessons. Therefore, he could only stay in the dormitory alone and watch movies.

On the screen, the movie slowly played on, but Song Shuhang could not focus well on its contents.

"Hasn't the medicine's effect faded yet? I'm tired…" he yawned and felt his eyelids getting heavier.

"Beep Beep Beep~" Just then, the chat software on his laptop screen came alive.

This sound was a notification that someone has invited him to a group chat.

"Who invited me?" Song Shuhang muttered while reaching out and gently touching the lower right corner of his screen. Immediately after, a message prompt popped out.

[True Monarch Yellow Mountain (*****) sends you a friend request.] Additional message: None.

True Monarch Yellow Mountain? Who used such a strange nickname?

'A classmate I guess?' Song Shuhang quietly thought and couldn't help but recall a few of his classmates that were obviously already in university, but seemed to still be in their youth fantasy period. Guessing from their behavior, they would definitely be capable of coming up with such strange nicknames.

After reasoning with himself, he then pressed "Accept".

Shortly after, another notification popped out.

[True Monarch Yellow Mountain has invited you to join the group 'Nine Provinces Number One Group, do you accept?]

Song Shuhang accepted once more.

'Stressed by a Mountain of Books has agreed to join the 'Nine Provinces Number One Group'.

Suddenly, his eyelids started getting heavier...

Song Shuhang "Hm?"

He felt that there was nothing holding him up, so he looked down. There was a spinning vortex below him, with nothing else visible to the human eye.

Song Shuhang "😫"

After the suspended-animation feeling ended, he plummeted to his death; the last thing he saw was the notification on his laptop showing [You have agreed to join the group. Please make an introduction of yourself to the other members 😉]A smiley face was even attached by the system.

'F***...' he thought, before the medicine's effect started kicking in...

👻👻👻

Noticing a new member has been added to the Nine Provinces Number One Group, the lurking members emerged.

Northern River's Loose Cultivator: "Did True Monarch Yellow Mountain invite a new fellow friend? Hasn't it been a year since a new member joined us?"

Another member with the ID of 'Su Clan's Seven' quickly replied, "There's a new fellow daoist? Is he from Mt Hua? Where's the immortal cave he's cultivating in? What's his dao name? Which stage of cultivation is he at?"

Why did this series of questions sound fishy?

Simultaneously, a user with the ID 'Thrice Reckless Mad Saber wrote', "What's the gender of our new fellow daoist? Are you a fairy? If so, please announce your three sizes and upload a photo!"

Looking at Su Clan's Seven and Thrice Reckless Mad Saber's messages, many of the lurking members within the group felt their mouths twitch.

"Brother Thrice Reckless, do you belong to a goldfish species or something?" Northern River's Loose Cultivator sighed. "What if True Monarch Yellow Mountain had invited another senior? You may bring disaster upon yourself once again!"

Thrice Reckless… this fella was good in every aspect, being a loyal person and eager to help others, thus his relations with others were pretty good—it was just that his uncouth tongue would pack him into life and death situations.

Unfortunately, this fella was so unlucky that it made one have goosebumps. The timing didn't matter—whenever he was reckless, he had always offended big seniors. These seniors who were all lacking in entertainment would naturally be happy to kill some time by torturing Thrice Reckless Mad Saber who sent himself right to their doorstep.

"I beg you, do not to mention the word 'big senior'… it is a traumatic experience that still haunts me," Thrice Reckless Mad Saber sent a row of 😭😭😭.

Four years ago, he had offended a beautiful 'big senior' with his stupid mouth and got tortured really badly… that senior had tormented him non-stop for one year and four months. Yes, that's right, a total of one year and four months! Thinking back to his extremely inhumane years, his eyes started to tear up.

Just when Thrice Reckless finished talking, the group members all sent a 😏 one by one—not at all concealing, but instead openly rejoicing at his misfortune.

There were eight members whose status was 'online' within the chat, and six of them had sent a sent a row of smiley faces.

"You bunch of schadenfreude as*holes, this lord has remembered every one of you. Don't even let me meet you, or else I shall let you to have a taste of my Seventy-Two Swift Saber Strikes!" Thrice Reckless Mad Saber grudgingly replied. He was confident in his swift saber and the six fellas who were laughing weren't his opponents in a one-on-one fight.

Just when Thrice Reckless Mad Saber finished talking, another ? appeared within the group. It was Su Clan's Seven who sent it.

Shortly after, Su Clan's Seven excitedly said, "When are we having the duel?"

Evidently, Su Clan's Seven hadn't actually wanted to rejoice at his misfortune—he'd just wanted an opponent for a fight.

"…" Thrice Reckless Mad Saber instantly lost his spirit.

Why? Because he couldn't win against Seven!

He had a profound cultivation base, having reached the late stage of Fifth Stage Spiritual Emperor Realm, just two steps away from becoming a Sixth Stage True Monarch. However, he was unable to defeat Seven.

Despite having his fast and fierce Seventy-Two Swift Saber Strikes, along with a lightning fast footwork , he was still unable to win against him.

He was called mad saber, and even he himself was afraid of his angry self. But even then, he was really no match for Seven!

After seeing Thrice Reckless losing his momentum, the members within the group sent another wave of 😆😆😆

"…" This time, Thrice Reckless Mad Saber could only depressingly send an ellipsis.

The group was puzzled—despite them making a ruckus for half a day, the newcomer had yet to appear.

"Our new dao friend isn't speaking?" Northern River Loose Cultivator asked.

Unfortunately, due to the medicine's effect, Song Shuhang had once again entered a state of being half-sleep while falling to his death(?) .

Just then, Su Clan's Seven happily sent a message. "I just took a look, our new dao friend is named 'Stressed by a Mountain of Books'. Has anyone heard of an expert with this dao name? His name seems as if he's a member of the scholarly faction? It sure makes me look forward to it! After all, the location of that sect is hidden quite well. It has been a few hundred years since I've last had a fight with them! Thinking back, fighting them is more pleasurable than dueling Buddhist monks. Not only do they have a glib tongue, their punches are powerful too! When they are in the mood, they would also heroically start reciting poems to liven things up, making it multiple times more fun! I love fighting with them the most."

"Seven, are your expectations towards new dao friends only limited to having fun fighting with them?" Reckless Mad Saber sent a 😭. This was basically an evil tyrant's way of doing things!

"Erm." Su Clan seven was slightly embarrassed.

Northern River's Loose Cultivator said, "Could it be another 'big senior' that is unacquainted with such chat software? 😏"

Having said that, apparently several people found this scene familiar?

That's right, about four years ago there was another senior that came out after hundreds years of closed-door cultivation and only managed to open the messaging application with great difficulty. Then, she was invited by True Monarch Yellow Mountain into the group. However, she did not send any messages as she didn't know how to type.

Afterwards, a fella named Thrice Reckless Mad Saber happily teased this big senior and requested for her three sizes, photos, voice chat, and such.

Subsequently.. a few days later, Thrice Reckless Mad Saber personally met this senior. She was very beautiful, as dazzling as the bright moon in the night sky.

Then, this alluring senior had tortured Thrice Reckless Mad Saber for one year and four months before she was perfectly satisfied and left.

Thrice Reckless Mad Saber was instantly overwhelmed and fell silent.

"Yellow Mountain?" Just then, someone with the ID 'Medicine Master' sent a message.

An unfathomable short message.

Luckily, everyone in the chat had long become accustomed to Medicine Master sending short messages—he was asking where True Monarch Yellow Mountain was.

The reason Medicine Master sent short messages wasn't due to his lofty personality, but because he used only two fingers and handwriting pad to type, therefore his speed was extremely slow. Also, there was a higher chance of making typos in a long text, plus deleting and writing anew was simply painful. Therefore, Medicine Master had a habit of only sending short messages. Over time, Medicinal Master was then labeled as someone whose words were as rare as gold when he communicated with the rest.

"He went offline immediately after sending the invitation. Apparently, his darling monster dog had angrily ran away from his house again and True Monarch Yellow Mountain went to chase him. Taking care of that precious monster dog and coming online to add him to the group sure isn't an easy task for True Monarch, he's definitely super busy right now," Northern River's Loose Cultivator replied.

Medicine Master: "…"

"We can only wait for the new dao friend to learn to use the chat software," Su Clan's seven sighed . They were all biased, thinking the new member was one of them.

The few members online weren't entertained looking at how unresponsive the new dao friend was and went offline one after another.

👻👻👻

Unknown Time-Ancient Heavenly Court Era

"Slow-Witted Song!!!" Someone bellowed out of anger,shame or pain due to the sore ache on his behind. Judging from the waves of rage he released, he was at least an Eighth Stage Profound Sage. Meanwhile, far far away there was a handsome youth wearing a daoist robe and was holding his stomach seems to be laughing his butt off over his latest act of crime.

"GAHAHAHAHAHA! Oh, that was...haha...really, they never seem to learn that...ha...you should never show your butt off to me,because...hah... 'cause I MIGHT JUST PUT SOMETHING IN IT! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I really wanted to try Sennen Gurushi*(Thousand Years of Pain) Pepper Edition on someone, and a freaking target just shows up. HA!" The handsome youth managed to choke out. Luckily, he activated a sound barrier to block off his cackles, otherwise the situation might have changed drastically.

20 minutes later...

"Oh, that was great, " The youth seized his laughter as he stood up and brushed nonexistent dust off his robe, and pulled out a small notebook "another good deed done. Now, if I can just find that Almighty Merchant, I'd just be able to pull off my next heist..." He thought darkly. Deep in his pl(ot)aning, he failed to realized that someone had sneaked behind him,though it was only for a moment. After seeking death again and again, if he didn't developed an instinct against danger, he'd be dead right now with all the resentment he'd gotten himself into.

The person(?) who'd managed to sneak up behind him had a black cloak with attributes like stealth/presence concealment/invisibility covering them, so he couldn't determine the gender, but looking at the tall and hunched figure, it must be someone old.'Damn, this oldie has some good stuff, it even took me awhile to felt their presence up close,hmm, I wonder if I can steal it?' a thought flashed by. Lately, his death-seeking tendencies have shot up through the Heavens lately, and the number of people that wanted to beat/kill him also had also sharply rise.

'There's only so much times the 'White Dragon Primogenitor' card can be tossed at them for,hah....' he thought regretfully.

Although he's been known by his many illustrious titles like 'Heavenly Court's Escape First' and 'Death-Seeker Song' and he does have confidence in his impregnable meat shield capabilities but...

'Wouldn't it be way more exciting to pit someone stronger than your enemies against them?' He thought excitedly. If anyone of his close "friends" were to know this, they'd probably beat him up , wrap and tie him then send him packing into the tiger's den to declare their involvement with him. Though,he'd just escape before they'd noticed. The feeling when someone get their hopes up over something, only to get slapped in the face is just reeeaaaalllllyyyyy satisfying.

"You," the cloaked figure suddenly spoke,it's voice crackling, breaking the youth out of his daydream.

"Slow-Witted Song," The cloak seemed to swayed,adding an air of drama despite the fact that there was no wind. 'Now it's getting interesting,' the handsome youth whose name is Slow-Witted Song seems to brightened. Seeing as the opposite party knows who he is, his resolve to steal it intensified.'You can only blame your luck...', he thought as the voice changed into something else.

Suddenly,the figure shouted these three characters with a different voice altogether.

"Song~~The Fool~~"A melodious voice greeted him, which contained the voice of nature itself. Slow-Witted Song only had time to contemplate the meaning of those words before a pair of eyes shot out of the hood and stare at him. They were crimson rings of flame-seemingly capable of burning down everything in its' path-yet he felt no pain as he gazed into them, only a numbing sense of pleasure.

Time seemed to be at a standstill, as if only two of them existed. Slow-Witted Song suddenly felt the palpitation of his (un)dead heart along with an indistinct yet familiar bloodline feeling accompanied by a sharp pain in his abdomen, as if someone just massage and kicked it at the same time.

He hastily shook his head,'Wait, I'm a ghost spirit, how can I have a heartbeat? DO I even have a heartbeat anymore?Just now, was that the legendary 'love at first sight'? Also, I haven't even gotten a girlfriend yet-let alone a child-so why did it feel like I just saw a long lost relative.................

Plus, could I secretly be a M and I didn't noticed it before?'

'No wait, that felt more like something I haven't felt in months,' He pondered, as cultivator's realm increase so does their comprehension and reflex increase as well. For these past few months since he arrived, he had quickly adjusted to his circumstances and quickly risen up as one of the top dogs of the Heavenly City. As someone who has people hating/wanting to beat him up to the triple digits-and only 10 have been able to do so-for someone daring to mess with him, then they've either just eaten some ******* or they're just really brave after knowing how many people he's got behind him to throw at.

"Oi, what did you—" He started, only to realize that the figure disappeared from the crime scene. Like how when you wake up one day and you'd discovered that you're seeing a different ceiling from the one you're used to seeing, and then realized that someone left you at the hotel,left, only to wake up and deal with the aftermaths of the previous night by trying to recall it alone.

"Ah,well," He shrugged, as if this was to be expected, maybe it was some slow-acting cursing technique that would spring up at a moment's notice or it could be some prank meant to scare him. Who knows? But the person who did this to him was long gone already,so he couldn't confront the opposite party. Besides, if they ever meet again he can just fire them one of his "big shots" at them as a greeting gift next time.

'I should get myself check.....but first, golden paint and an extra large paintbrush,here I come yõ~' He thought as he skipped along giddily, as if nothing happened to him these past few hours ago and everything was just perfectly peachy. Unknowingly, his lower half has started undergoing small changes to perform certain operations-and judging from the looks of things-perhaps within five to six days, the first male implantation would be carried out. As we speak, the ovum cell just got formed.

💀💀💀💀💀💀

XXX Time - XXX space

In a faraway planet, there lied a human hunched back as they typed on a desktop computer. The screen showed an unfinished plot being draft and edited, with the sounds 'click-clack' vibrating repeatedly with every type.

??? "Mwahaha, perfect, PERFECT!!! Now, a little bit of editing here and there,and....done. Now, me and the bathroom can have a nice long chat..." The person murmured as they got up and went to the toilet.

-Okay, my name is SleepyKid and I'm going to explain to those who don't know how this operation works to the best of my abilities,

So:

We know that females have two of the same kind of sex chromosome (XX), and are called the homogametic sex while males typically have two different kinds of sex chromosomes (XY), and are called the heterogametic sex. The presence or absence of the Y chromosome is critical because it contains the genes necessary to override the biological default - female development - and cause the development of the male reproductive system.

In short: (XX)+(XY)= X(X or Y)

Stages of human development

1.Zygotic stage: The zygote is formed when the male gamete (sperm) and female gamete (egg) fuse.

2.Blastocyst stage: The single-celled zygote begins to divide into a solid ball of cells. Then, it becomes a hollow ball of cells called a blastocyst, attaching to the lining of the mother's uterus.

3.Embryonic stage: The major internal organs and external features begin to emerge, forming an embryo. In this stage, the heart, brain, and spinal cord become visible. Arms and legs start to develop.

4.Fetal stage: Once the formed features of the embryo begin to grow and develop, the organism is considered a fetus. Differentiation and specialization of structures happens during this time.

All of this stuff above is Google'd.

Since there's no mother, Slow-Witted Song's testis and scrotum ended up changing it's function by releasing gamete for both genders into his newly-formed uterus where the blastocyst ends up in. He can still be considered a man and do other 'male things' but now he can be considered a trans since he has both reproductive parts yõ~~