While the idea behind the story is good, it pains me to say that the poor writing quality makes it unenjoyable. There are too many dialogues, but we have no idea about how the character feels, what they were doing, or what's the situation surrounding them. It lacks proper explanation. This work might be more appropriate as a theater script. Also, as I've mentioned in many of my reviews, proper punctuation is important. Thats what makes a sentence can be easily comprehended. If the author makes no visible improvement in the future, I'm afraid I can't go on reading this. Sorry.
Zeton
Liked it!
MÖGEN