Prologue: A Mysterious Note

I've had headaches before. I have experienced hangovers that left me foaming at the mouth and begging for death but never before have I felt anything this painful.

The first thing I noticed was the dirty walls around me and the disgusting mixture of urine and... iron, blood perhaps then? My baby daughter, though I love her endlessly has made sure I will never forget the smell of urine. So it was unmistakable what that first smell to hit my nose was. I was too familiar to not recognize it.

Trying to move around with the splitting headache I have is impossible. I noticed the oddly clean-looking note a few meters away. It could be my delirious state, but I'm sure it has a slight glow to it. But it doesn't matter since I can't even move my arm without my head feeling like it will explode. Not like a migraine or something similar, I've had those before. There is no explaining this raging pain, I might just go mad if it keeps going.

Lucky for me though, it seems to be disappearing rapidly. I've been here for a few minutes I reckon and I can feel the headache fading. It's an excruciating process though. So just because it's getting better doesn't mean the pain is less. I can even feel the pain lessening and it hurts. How do you explain that kind of pain - you can't.

It takes a solid ten minutes for it all to disappear. It doesn't even feel real now that it is gone. Like it was never real and just my own imagination. There is no lingering pain or soreness anywhere. I feel perfectly fine like I can run a marathon. How utterly strange. Now to figure out why I am in this very dirty alley.

But, the note first. It's been driving me nuts seeing it just laying there, taunting me to read it but being unable to. Time to face your demise, note! I will read you vigorously and then rip you to pieces with the fury of the Norse Gods.

{Hello, Set!

Sorry for the slight headache. It is an unfortunate side effect of mortals crossing dimensional barriers. Your feeble minds can not quite handle it. I will make sure to lessen it as much as possible (so you don't go insane) and make the landing as smooth as I can. I am not omnipotent (yet) so I can only dampen the pain slightly.

Anyway, time for an explanation. You are in the universe 24B; known to you as the Elemental Nations. You were chosen for the ascension. Allow me to elaborate on that. There are multiverses born every day, every second technically, but let's not overwhelm your mind with something it can't comprehend yet. Anyway, mortals with divine blood get chosen and sent on a quest to reach ascension.

This is an automated process, kind of like the universal laws. We Gods can not interfere with it, nor can we stop it or change it in any way. Our only role is to guide and explain the gist of all this to people like you. People who carry divine blood but has yet to activate it. There are billions, maybe more (even I don't know) divinities in existence, and only one God can rule over each one. You carry the divine blood of Hel (Helheim).

When you get stronger, this will all be explained in more detail, so this note is just the basics. Just know that everything you thought was true is probably wrong (no pressure) and that if you survive the trials ahead, you will become a genuine God. The big G.

Last thing, the job of Gods such as us is to mainly keep existence stable. Within it, it carries an infinite amount of multiverses, our job is basically prison guards. We make sure the mortals within walk the path they are supposed to walk, and we also handle rogue Gods. They conquer multiverses and takes the countless mortals in them to war against other Gods. There is a basis for this, but there is little reason to tell you of that with how insignificant you are currently.

Grow strong and when the time comes, I will contact you again.}

What the hell?!

My eyes just stay glued to the note. I know I should look away and slam my head into the wall next to me, but my body literally won't move.

First of all... Naruto? How can it be real if it's fiction as well, or used to be? I don't understand this at all.

Suddenly the note in my had is replaced with another one.

{The work of Gods. Some universes that are much older than yours get turned into writing for mortals to enjoy. Not all fiction you read is real. For example, most pornographic fiction is fake. Game of Thrones is unfortunately not the work of us Gods. That is good old George's genius at work, so unless a God creates that world, it will remain only in fiction. I hope this clears that up. Got to go, worlds to save and assholes to rip apart (not literal).}

Wow, I'm surprisingly calm. I was sure that as soon as I was done reading the first note that I would smash my head into the wall, effectively ending my existence; but I surprised myself by only raising my right eyebrow and letting out a soft sigh.

What in the seven layers of Hell is going on here?!

Apparently, I am the heir to Helheim or something. No wonder I became a professor of mythology. Maybe I have a natural affinity for its ways - whatever that means. but why am I in the world of Naruto? I know quite a bit about it, and I know it's the worst possible match for me. I am a laid back person, lazy some would say. This world is brutal beyond belief.

Well, whatever. There is nothing I can do about it now. I should probably find out where the hell I am, and what the current era is. If it's the warring period, I think I'm doomed to die. I have literally no training or any power. I don't even know if I have chakra.

I wonder if I get some sort of power from having divine blood. If I do, it will most likely be a cold-based power. There are multiple versions of Hel spanning the many mythologies, and pop culture usually imagine it being a freezing hellhole.

Hel has also been described many times as being not very different From Valhalla. A place where the dead can continue doing what they had done while alive - drinking, sleeping and fighting. Depending on what version, and what religion my divinity belongs to, my powers will vary. I assume from the note that I am the heir to Helheim - The Norse version of Hel.

The really annoying bit about this is that I don't know for sure which Hel I hail from, which means I can't be sure what my powers will be. Maybe I don't even get powers until I become a complete God. That would suck.

Anyway, time to make my way out of this dirty alley before I catch something. I pray to Go- scratch that, I pray to myself that I am in The Hidden leaf. It's the only village I know of. I don't really remember anything about any other place. And that's me going off the assumption that this is going to play out as the show does.

I use the wall to help myself off the ground, but as my hand touches the wall the strangest thing occurred. The place my hand was touching froze over. A kind of Cyan-blue substance spread out over the wall until I removed my hand - then it stopped spreading.

"How'd you do that?!" Suddenly there was an almost panicky voice above me. It didn't sound hostile, just curious - kind of like when my students would get over-enthusiastic about their damn questions.

"Hey! Do you hear me, old guy?" I buried the desire I had to raise my voice. This was The Elemental nations, a kid could probably kill me right now.

I turn around only to spot something unfortunate. A girl, probably around twelve or so. Blonde hair, a look of awe on her face and I knew my plan to lay low had just instantly gone down the drain. Mother***** Tsunade. Damn it to hel!

At least I know where I am now in the timeline. This is not going to end well for me I feel.

"Yeah. Sorry, I just woke up from one hel of a nap."

Tsunade jumped down from the roof she was standing on. A feat I know would break the leg of a normal person. At least now I know that basically, any kid here could beat me up. How fun...

"In an alley? Are you homeless or stupid?" She asked that completely serious.

"Neither."

I don't remember her much, but I'm already starting to dislike her. Though I understand her question. If you aren't homeless why would you sleep in an alley? Good question and one I can not answer.

I own a home, I will simply forgo to mention that it is located in another universe. That would be an uncomfortable conversation to have.

"Whatever, what was that jutsu you just did? I have never seen someone use ice before. And you didn't use any hand signs, nothing of the sorts. Who are you?" She became much more animated and alive, her eyes locked onto me like a hawk.

I can't escape, she is obviously faster than me; and I don't want to kill her - doubt I even can. She also has close ties to multiple world-destroying monsters so my identity is basically already screwed. Damn this is stressful.

"Trade secret. A magician never reveals his greatest trick, young lady. I will just be on my way then, I have places to be, people to see." I took a shot. I failed obviously since she jumped in front of me instantly. Her eyes said it all, I wasn't getting out of here unless I went through her.

"First of all. I am not some spoiled young lady, I am a kunoichi. And you're not leaving until I know how you did that. It was awesome." She has a slight grin plastered on her face.

I could see even now that she would grow up to be a beautiful lady. Some people (not me) are just born lucky. She has obviously always been beautiful. I was born a troll and grew into a half-human half-troll abomination.

"Is it not considered rude trying to pry at a family's secret. Would you like me asking endless questions about the Senju wood-style?" Her eyes opened just a little. I might just get out of this without a broken neck after all. She is still a child, maybe the innate authority within the adult-child relationship will help me here.

Now, let's hope she is famous at this age so she doesn't question why I know of her and her family.

"I-I didn't realize. You're right, it is rude to ask about family jutsus. I was being inconsiderate." She actually bowed to me, which I wholeheartedly did not expect. "I apologize." She said as sincerely as I could probably ask for.

Lucky! I might survive still.

"It's alright. But be more considerate next time. At least make sure that it's okay to ask about certain personal topics before doing so. That will make your relationship with your peers much more manageable." I try my best at smiling. Maybe it worked because she had a little blush. Probably from the embarrassment rather than my smile. A smiling half-troll is only charming to other half- trolls.

"Mm." She nodded, hesitant to continue. I had seen that look hundreds of times on new students the first day in my classroom. It was pure shyness, and it was very useful when dealing with children.

"Now, I do not talk about my secrets to just anybody. Also, I would appreciate it if you didn't mention this, I have lived a quiet life and would like to continue doing so. I am not an aspiring shinobi like you, youngling."

"I guess that's fine. B-But would it be possible to see your ability again sometime?" Her fascination and curiosity were gonna spell my doom. Must I always walk around looking over my shoulder worrying about her following me everywhere now?

"Maybe. The world is a large place. I have things to do, as I'm sure you have a mission or classes to get to." I could almost see the panic setting in on her, but she had a sturdy stoic mask on.

"RIght. I have class soon. Thanks for reminding me, I hope to see you soon!" She jumped away in a quick manner.

"This is bad." There is virtually no way she is keeping this from her grandfather if he is still alive. Despite what I asked of her, I don't think even shinobi children are that tight-lipped. She will definitely tell someone about the random guy in the village that can freeze things with just a touch. And on that note - WHAT THE HELL!?

___________________________________________________________________________________

End