Chapter 91: A Night To Dis-Remember

The Pub, Hogsmeade Village, Wizarding World...

Harry James Potter awoke to the tune of a piano playing in the distance. Ron had been leaning on the edge of the bar with a cup of whatever Lucius Malfoy had mixed for him with a giddy smile plastered across his freckled face. His lengthy Weasley red hair had been soaked from sweat and sticking to his forehead. The green eyed wizard got to his feet feeling rather groggy and stumbling as he reached his full height.

Lucius Malfoy had a big wide grin filed across his charming face.

"Potter." he said rather amused and clearly drunk. "Welcome to the party...it took you quite some time...you must be a light weight."

Snape had been sitting at a grand piano that Harry had been pretty sure was not there when he first arrived and was most likely conjured by one of them. He too had an air of having been slightly drunk himself.

Draco Malfoy had been shirtless and sitting with his back to Snape's as he continued to play the piano. The two of them had been rather drunkenly singing a song that seemed to have Ron captivated.

"Blue jean baby..." sang Draco happily drunk.

"L.A...lady..." sang Lucius Malfoy joining in, raising his glass once more taking a drink. "Seamstress for the band..."

" Pretty eyed, pirate smile, you'll marry a music man..." sang Snape. "Ballerina, you must have seen her dancing in the sand...And now she's in me, always with me, tiny dancer in my hand..."

Harry had no idea why but he felt as if he had been at the greatest drunken concert in existence. Tears started streaming down his cheeks as he watched Snape's fingers dance across the piano with as much precision and talent as he had when chopping potions ingredients.

The group continued to sing the muggle Elton John's classic while the drinks kept flowing. Before long two more guests arrived in the form of Remus Lupin and Albus Dumbledore.

"Looks like the party's started without us." said Lupin with a grin.

"Werewolf, glad you could make it." said Lucius with a wicked grin.

"I wouldn't have missed it for the world given the snarky one is finally getting hitched." said Lupin amused as he looked over at the drunken piano playing Snape.

"Hold me closer tiny dancer...count the headlights on the highway..." sang Snape still playing. "Lay me down in sheets of lien...you had a busy day today..."

Draco had tears streaming down his own pale cheeks.

"It's so beautiful uncle Sev..." he said patting his godfather on the shoulder.

After a round of applause Snape ended the song and turned his attention to Dumbledore.

"Well...well...the lions want to party with the snakes." he said seemingly amused despite his drunken nature.

"Well by all means." said Lucius with a wicked grin. "Let us party."

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The Malfoy Manor, Wizarding World...

Hermione had been among friends and of course family with her mother joining Professor McGonagall, Narcissa Malfoy, Ginny Potter, Susan Weasley, and a few other girls Hermione had barely been acquainted with.

Narcissa had of course been the host of the event having it at her manor. She had seen it as her duty to endure the bride of Severus Snape has a reasonable send off given that she knew Lucius would be doing the same for the groom.

"You didn't have to do all this." said the soon to be wed witch looking around at all the pink and white decor.

"Honey please." said Narcissa. "This is just as much a party for the rest of us as it is for you."

"Drinks for everyone!" said Ginny as the silver tray moved about serving champagne as it floated in the air.

Hermione shook her head. She didn't doubt that Severus would be getting drunk before the night was through.

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The Pub, Hogsmeade Village, Wizarding World...

Lucius Malfoy had been pleased at current status of his guests. They had been good and drunk before he began to unveil his web of surprises for the night. He had no doubt that Narcissa had been putting on a respectable clinic for the women but the men had been in the care of Hogwarts Castle's biggest party animal.

It had been assured that this event would be spoken of for ages.

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Malfoy Manor, Wizarding World...

The drinks had been flowing and downed at alarming rates as the women complained of married life and complimented the freedom the night had given them. They had traded a good deal of stories about their various significant others.

"Well...Harry is sweet and sensitive." said Ginny with a smile. "I can't imagine my life without him...but sometimes he's..."

"A complete bore in bed." said Narcissa sipping away at her champagne.

"Narcissa." said Hermione stunned by the brutal honesty the host had shown.

"Well it's true...most of you Gryffindors settle for humdrum lives while we Slytherins indulge in passions beyond your wildest dreams." said the lady of the manor.

Susan's ears perked.

"W-Well Ron's...well he's good...and I don't mind the constant shagging." she said with her cheeks turning red.

Hermione sipped the remainder of her champagne not at all comfortable knowing about the sex lives of her two best friends.

"Well, age does have it's advantages." said Minerva. "Of course you are all too young to know anything about that."

With that Hermione refilled her glass.

"What about Snape?" asked Ginny seemingly curious.

"What about my future husband?" asked the amber eyed witch with an arched brow.

"You know..." said Susan with a small smirk.

"What's he like?" asked Ginny.

"Severus is...Severus," said Hermione not at all wishing to divulge her intimate moments with her friends.

Narcissa rolled her eyes.

"Severus and Hermione here shag like un-monitored rabbits on a daily basis." she said. "The man's positively insatiable and it appears he's met his match in our lovely lioness here."

Hermione's cheeks turned red.

"Oh my!" said Jean Granger looking over at her daughter.

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Hogsmeade Village, Wizarding World...

The party had spilled into the street and something of a fight escalated between a drunken Harry Potter and a Lucius Malfoy over a comment made in passing by the drunken older wizard.

Ron had been trying his best to hold Harry back as he attempted to get his hands on Malfoy Senior.

"I'LL KILL YOU MALFOY!" shouted Harry drunk but irate.

Lucius didn't seem to be all that intimidated by the slayer of Voldemort.

"Lighten up Potter." he said in a casual tone. "So Severus and your mother shagged in an old classroom it's no big deal."

"EXPELLIARMUS!" shouted Harry drawing his wand.

Lucius smirked as he noted that Harry's spell had not worked.

"You drank the Serpent's Snare." he said causally. "A well to do drink that doubles as a magical suppression potion."

Harry growled in rage and attempted to punch the smug Senior Malfoy.

"You know it's Severus you should be angry with." said Lucius drunkenly outraged. "He's the one that got her bloody pregnant."

Ron's blue eyes widened.

Snape had barely a moment to register what Lucius had done.

"What?" asked Harry turning to his former Potions Professor.

"Ignore him." replied Snape casually. "He's drunk."

"We're all drunk." replied Harry meeting Snape's gaze. "What does he mean you got my mother pregnant?"

Snape rolled his eyes.

"It's nothing." he said. "I was simply an irresponsible boy and she did what she thought was best given the situation."

"I-I had a brother or sister?" asked Harry not at all able to process what he was being told given his drunken nature. "You shagged my mother!"

"From what I've been told she was quite a good lay." said The Senior Malfoy swaying a bit as he relished his drunkenness.

"Fuck off Malfoy." said Snape annoyed. "You've gone too far."

"Severus...the boy has a right to know that you could have just as easily been his father as you could have Draco." said Lucius.

Upon hearing this everyone looked from Snape to Harry.

"Ignore him." said Snape annoyed. "It's all the drink talking...of course Lucius has never known when to shut the hell up."

Harry managed to get out of Ron's grasp. He attacked Lucius and everything went down hill from there.

Draco came to his father's aid taking out Harry only to be attacked by Ron.

Snape attempted to pull Ron off Draco only to be struck by a drunken Lupin angry that Snape had been that irresponsible with his former friend.

The Marauder and The Slytherin ended up in a fist fight startling everyone else.

Harry and Draco continued to scuffle the animosity of their days at Hogwarts didn't seem to have died down as much as they believed.

Growing tired of the constant bickering, Dumbledore leveled them all with a walking stick he found on the journey outside and the fighting ceased.

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Malfoy Manor, Wizarding World...

The women had let their hair down, dancing and singing as if they each had not a care in the world. Hermione had been treated to a night of giggles and shared secrets. It had been the sort of party she had been looking forward to since the prospect was presented to her and respective of the fact that she didn't want to make a fool of herself with male wizards taking their clothes off for the amusement of her guests.

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Hogsmeade Village, Wizarding World...

Harry Potter, Draco Malfoy, and Ron Weasley had turned their collective attentions to wishing their best friend "Sebastian Prince" well on his impending marriage to Hermione Granger. Lucius had been slightly jealous that Severus had even considered the children friend material given that they had been close in their day.

Not to be out done he had convinced the boys to help spike Dumbledore's drink and the rest of them took to vandalizing wizarding world property at the behest of Lucius.

Aberforth Dumbledore had been the target of their latest goat-napping plot and Severus helped himself to a bit of the whiskey stock before they took off into the night amused by their own antics.

Both Ron Weasley and Draco Malfoy had to be taken back to the pub, where they passed out from all the "fun".

Lucius had been impressed by Harry Potter's resolve in playing with the big boys so to speak. They even called a truce of sorts as Severus' stag party came to a definite close.