I snapped into conciousness with the crisp crackle of a perfect wafer.
Unfortunately, without the chocolate cream filling.
All around me was pitch black darkness, no, more like nothingness.
A void in existence itself, or at least that's the feeling it gave me.
A sort of unknown feeling, neither positive nor negative but somehow, ..... thriving. Yes that was the word, thriving.
Mhmmmm... I moaned, or should have.
Except I don't have a mouth and I must scream!
No sooner had I thought of it, did a mouth pop into existence.
"Weird." I said, testing this new appendage.
"Wuyahydyaysgs!" I garbled, checking ny pronunciation.
"Hmm...sounds good enough. Now where am I?" I wandered aloud.
"In the void between worlds. Squared." Came a voice beside me.
Suddenly, I found myself sitting on a couch, watching a couple dozen screens, each showing a different version of what I recognized to be me. Or something like me.
Each of them appeared to be supremely powerful, destroying and creating worlds as they saw fit, reshaping reality to their wills.
And is that...is that Scp-whatshername, yami keteru? Making out with what looked like a very horny version of me, and I mean horny! Dude's got horns for day, horns on his shoulders, fingers, even his dick! Like a fucking stag beetle.
Then, as if a bubble burst, clarity came over me as I realized the obvious.
Wait! Me?
Me!
Who am I? No, what am I?
Nonononononononon! This can't be happening! I-i-i-
SLAP!
I felt the pinch of it on the back of my head as a man came into view, sotting beside me on the couch, looking like a Ban knockoff, except far more scarred.
"Wha-!" I jumped from the couch in fright, as I gathered a coherent thought.
"How long have you been here? And where is here anyway?" I asked.
The man sighed, putting down the remote, and looked at me with a look reserved for dogs that had just puked on the carpet.
"Let's get this straight and over with.
This is the void between worlds, as I just fucking told you, and I am a Random Omnipotent Being.
You can call me Rob. Now you, Mr. whatever-your-name-is, are here because I am in need of entertainment and all of your previous versions have severely messed up my jazz, if you know what I mean?"
"No. Actually, I don't know what you're talking about. And hold the fuck on!
What is my name? You are Omnipotent so you should know what my name is, shouldn't you?" I pestered.
"Well first, Omnipotent not Omniscient.
And second, yeah I know it. But I'm not gonna tell you. Why?
Cuz I'm pissed!
You see these scars?" He said, pointing to his chest.
Clearly visible through his black tank top and low hanging jeans, were numerous scars, healed and covered in light scar tissue.
But a closer inspection revealed eldritch fractals forming the scar tissue, dragging my gaze deeper and deeper until another slap stung on my head.
"Fucking pervert! Focus on what I'm saying first. You can ogle me later!" The man said.
"Hey! I wasn't ogling you! I don't even swing that way! Besides why do you care? And what's with that Ban look?
You'd think a Rob like you would choose a better shape, something more.... imposing." I said.
"I was getting to that before you tried getting into my panties.
As I was saying, your other versions got a deal with me and then turned back and chipped me on it, sticking me with this form.
And of course, the scars, from their final attacks as they left to travel the multiverse.
So here you are. And before you ask, yes, it's to torture you. I want revenge and so it's your turn to entertain me. I'll be sending you into the world of My Hero Academia and you'll flop around in vain attempts to reach me, never living a happy moment in your life, chasing away all those close to you in an bid to leave the world and escape your inevitable death when I get bored and snap the world out of existence.
So go forth, and gasp for breath like a fish out of water. Let me enj-"
"Now hold on a minute there." I interjected.
"Do you not see the pattern here?"
"What pattern?" He asked, tilting his head in wonder.
"This pattern! You force me into unreasonable deals and then I get hateful and it comes to bite you back in the ass. Then you repeat the cycle in an attempt to get revenge and the cycle begins anew.
You're trapped in a time loop of sorts, churning out more and more versions of me, each escaping and scarring more of you!
Did you not think for one minute that this could be a trap set up by the first version of me, to torture you into learning your lessons, about not toying with mortals?"
A look of realization flashed in his eyes as he muttered.
"Fuck! Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck! That bastard!"
"Exactly. And what's worse is that how you're ignoring the simplest solution to this problem on hand!
Why do you think the me-s keep coming back to hurt you, to risk their lives fighting a nigh-omnipotent being, for no good reason?" I asked.
"Is it because of the-" he replied, as I interrupted him with a mocking tone.
"Is It BeCaUsE oF ThE CoNtrAcTs!
Of course it's because of the contracts!
No one likes being a slave or a toy to another, especially if that someone is me.
Besides, why do you even need a contract forcing them to entertain you? They are otakus who'd sell their grandma's soul to be isekai'd.
Do you really think you need a slave contract to make it fun?
They'll entertain you even without that!"
"Th-that is something I never considered..." he said, reflecting upon his actions.
"Then I'm free to go?" I asked.
"Yeah, no. You're still going down there. But I may loosen up on the contract a little..." he suggested.
"Haaah!" I sighed in exasperation.
"Look! Let's just forgo the whole entertainment contract and make a bet. If I can get back here, then I get to go free and you help me get to a world that'll allow me to travel the multiverse. No other deals or contracts needed. Just a man to man bet. Honorable, I swear!
And I won't even come back to get vengeance against you.
No more scars. No more pain.
How's that sound?" I asked.
The entity thought for a moment before answering.
"Fine. You have a deal. Now let's get you down there.."
"Waitwaitwaitwaitwait! Hold on. What about my powers? No cheats to bestow upon me?
And what about my living condition?
Don't I get to decide that?
Like the three wishes thing?"
The Rob looked at me like an idiot.
"I'm not a fucking genie, you get? You don't get three wishes or jack shit else. I'll dump you in an abandoned alley and be done with it!" He answered annoyed.
"You know, that's the exact same attitude that got you hurt so many times. Maybe work on that, y'know? At least give me what you gave the others, else I don't know what I might do when I return, you get?" I teased with a smirk.
"You dare!"
He looked at me in anger before sighing in defeat.
"Fine. You'll get the same thing as the previous ones. But weaker.
I gave them the full SCP-4001, Alexandria Eternal as their cheat powers. But not for you. And that's final.
I'll give you a version of it that I created, weaker and immature, like a diet version of it.
I call it the Extradimensional Library.
It'll be empty to begin with, but as you witness more and more people, within your range, which, by the way is capped at around 200 meters, it'll auto-generate their books and the shelves required.
Unlike in the original though, you get no power boost from this, and the shelves are standard sized home library versions, not the 100 meter ultra-long ones like in the SCP-4001 version.
Your energy pool will be small to begin with but will increase with training, at a proportional pace, so you won't get to just abuse the powers of the library, so no arbitrary blackholes or instant deaths.
At least not until you're powerful enough to bear the energy cost.
Try it before, and you'll die.
Also, you're the locus of your summons, i.e, you summon the library to you, not the other way round.
So no teleporting by piggybacking on the shelves.
I know what you're thinking.
You try that and you'll be stuck in vacuum packed pocket dimension forever." He warned.
"I see. So if I summon the library to me, and I'm inside the library, then I can't return to where I'm not present!" I exclaimed.
"Exactly!" He replied, rubbing his hands.
"Now then, let's get you on world!"
"No! Hold on. One last thing. I still need to decide where I'll be born and under what circumstances!" I protested.
He rolled his eyes at me, and huffed.
"Can't you just take the usual Musutafu placement as a neighbour to Deku?" He asked.
I looked at him in disgust, as I answered.
"Why the actual fuck would I want that? I don't wanna have to deal with that whiny little shit all my childhood!
Nope! Never!
I want a placement in Tokyo, in a single father household, upper middle class background.
Now I want the most amount of freedom to move around and execute my plans, so to that end, I have some conditions on the family.
Mother leaves to have an affair when I reach the age of four.
Father works in an upper management position making a neat salary.
His personality should be a mix between Senjougahara's dad from Bakemonogatari and Inuyashiki from the namesake. Preferably workaholic after the wife leaves, but not an alcoholic.
A decent body, male, obviously, with good genetics and above average looks.
Height at above 5 feet 10 inches and capped at 6 feet 4 inches, in the absence of a gigantification or muscle augmentation quirk.
Penis size between 6 and 7 inches. Skin tone light, jawline smooth, between a trapezoidal and elliptical.
Schooling should be lax and allow for the going home club option.
No bullies either. Nice teachers and a fast track program for gifted youth." I replied, authoritatively dictating my demands.
The Rob looked at me curiously, a light smile of amusement on his face.
"Boy, that is a very detailed backstory. You sure came prepared huh?" The entity said.
"Yeah. I'm taking no chances. I have a plan and I will have it be as convenient as possible." I answered.
"Very well then. Is that all or are you going to word vomit some more?" He asked mockingly.
"Just one last thing. I want to be the same age as Deku and the rest. Maybe a bit older, but falling in the same birth year as the main cast. Can't let my future knowledge go to waste, can I now. Assuming I get to keep my memories?" I pointed out.
"Yeah, sure. Why not? You're amusing enough. This'll be interesting to watch. Then, down you go!" He said, snapping his fingers, as I vanished from the emptiness.
The next I awoke, I was in a warm, wet environment, a comforting, the lullaby of a distant thrum gently nudging me into a deep sleep.
Ah yes, the womb. I thought as my conciousness faded and I fell asleep.