The Saga of the Runt (Youjo Senki/WH30k) by L4 of the WEST

Words: 483k+

Links: -https://forums.spacebattles.com/threads/the-saga-of-the-runt-youjo-senki-wh30k.987151/

-https://archiveofourown.org/works/36412351/chapters/90786970

-https://m.fanfiction.net/s/14022410/1/The-Saga-of-the-Runt-Youjo-Senki-WH30k

-https://forum.questionablequesting.com/threads/18591

(Tanya in 30k as a Primark, (we're just having a good time here, having fun with the concept don't think too hard about it)

Chapter 1, Crash landing

Salaryman

Cold… unbearable cold on my face as I coughed up something from my lungs. That was the first thought and action I took as I woke up, confused by the frigid air. I opened my eyes and found that I was looking up through a shattered glass pane into the night sky. Not sure what was happening I moved and quickly found that I was in some kinda liquid soup, meant to help gestation while in the incubation pod. How I knew that was not readily available, and it didn't matter at this moment. Whatever mechanism that was meant to keep the liquid warm seemed to have failed, and with the outer glass damaged the cold was quickly transferring inside. I needed to get outside and find some way to warm myself or I would be frozen inside the pod.

Putting my hands against the edges of the pod, I gave it a shove but quickly found I didn't have the leverage to open it in one go. Taking a breath I moved my legs till they were touching the farther but firmer insides of the pods, this resulted in putting my head under the liquid soup but also gave me the leverage I needed. So, as I bared my teeth and held my breath, I gave a great shove. This time the pod door burst open, the metal panel flying free and landing who knows where. Carefully I pulled myself out of the soup and got a look around myself.

Snow, Rocks, lots of trees, and a bit of fire, that was the sight that greeted my eyes as I looked around. Pulling free of the wrecked pod I stumbled over to one of the fires that had been started by the impact of the pod into the side of the mountain I now stood on. Shivering a little I started to warm myself as best I could. This was not where I had last been aware, the last thing I remembered I was about to board the train home after a good day's work. Then something happened, what happened…

It was foggy, the last thing I remembered seemed jumbled and gave my mind a bit of a headache. Putting my hand to my head to massage my temples I eventually managed to remember something finally, a pair of hands, a shove, then fear as I felt myself flying toward the rails of a train station, that waste of potential I had fired staring at me as I fell, his eyes cold to my demise with his anger. I died, didn't I? I'd have given that waste of human potential every chance to turn his life around, everything the company had been willing to do, and the thanks I got was to be shoved to my death. What a comically terrible way to die. But there was something more, I could vaguely remember time slowing and laughter. Trying to pierce the fog on those memories seemed fruitless because all I could get was the bird-like laughter and a headache. Shaking my head I move to draw my hand back from my face to start to prepare for whatever this was, when I noticed something off about my hand. It was thinner than I remembered it, more… feminine.

Looking down at myself quickly put an end to that question. I was going to have to get used to this, not only had I been killed but apparently, I had been graced with a new body and gender for this life. Shaking My head I got up, moved over to the pod, and checked for any supplies. I was hoping that whatever force had made it had at least created a supply kit so a person could survive a deep winter. Unfortunately, no luck as I quickly realized this was not some kinda sci-fi escape pod. Whatever it was it had been ripped from a cement wall, judging by the debris around it. I would guess that it had been created for the strict purpose of making this body, what this body had been made for I wasn't sure.

Though looking at pieces of metal that were polished enough I was able to get a look at myself… The girl looked to be somewhere between late teens and early 20s, European descent, I guess northern countries. Five foot something I estimated, with matted and unkempt blond hair and blue eyes. Shaking my head at how unkempt I looked, I ripped a jagged piece of metal off the side of the pod. It took my brain a moment to realize that the shard came off a lot easier than it should have but once it did I came to a conclusion quickly; the body may look normal, but the muscles must be enhanced in some way.

If it had that would make surviving this frozen hellscape a bit easier. Hell, with increased strength I could probably knock over a tree and use it for wood, making this a real-life game of Minecraft as it were. Chuckling at the thought I used the metal I had ripped free, and cut free some wires from the pod. I then wandered over to a nearby group of trees and pulled off a branch. How I knew how to do this was questionable, I had trawled the internet enough in my last life and had come across survival manuals and the such but this didn't feel like this was coming from my last life. This felt instinctual, like I simply knew what needed to be done to the way I used the wires to tie the metal shard to the wooden branch, creating a crude spear, I was willing to listen to this instinct.

First things first though. Taking pieces of wood from a nearby tree to feed the fire, and using the debris from my pod and the rock scattered about I created a fire pit around one of the bigger fires then fed it some more of the wood. Until I could get some clothing to keep myself warm I would need to maintain this fire in order to warm myself between expeditions into the woods. I had three goals that needed to be accomplished for my survival. I needed to find shelter, somewhere I could get out of the snow and keep warm. I needed to find food and clothing, if I found an animal I could kill I could create something crude to wear which would allow for longer expeditions in the snow-covered forest and increase my survival chances. Finally I needed to find people, even if I got my base hierarchy of needs covered. If I didn't find someone to talk to mental degradation was likely, madness would not come quickly but it would come as humans were not meant to be completely without social connection.

Salaryman

Finding shelter turned out to be not as hard as I had feared, on the first day of searching I found what appeared to be a cave on the outskirts of a volcanically active area of the mountains. And as far as I could tell from what little experiences I had with survival, the caves were safe and kept warm by heat radiating from the Earth in this area. The nearby lake on the other hand I doubted was very safe, I had seen enough bones around it to convince me that something was up with it. Either it was the hunting ground of something or perhaps volcanic activity was releasing something that poisoned the water or the air. Either way, I kept my distance and simply used the heat in the cave as well as a fire to turn freshly fallen snow into something drinkable.

Food and clothing also were quickly solved. Well… Not so much solved, as I had a good lead. There were what could best be described as Elk, though their size seemed greater than I would have expected. I was familiar with the fact that elk were larger creatures than deer of course, but these monsters looked like they could gore an American humvee. If I managed to kill one I would have furs and meat for weeks at a minimum. The problem, of course, was how was I to kill one, the answer took a bit but it came to me in time. All it took was tracking its movements and traveling routes, the beast seemed to be the king of the winter forest so as long as I stayed out of its way it seemed to ignore me. Before long I had planned.

Which was why I was waiting in the cold, covered in mud to hide myself and my scent, as I held tightly onto a tree. In one hand I carried the spear, in the other the longest and toughest cables from the remnants of my pod. I had already prepared my trap, stringing the cables from one tree to the one I now held onto. All I needed was the beast, and I didn't have to wait long. Plenty of planning worked in my favor as soon the beast was slowly plodding along the route I knew it took while searching for food. Carefully I watched, waiting till the last moment before I pulled hard on the cable. Normally pulling cables on the tree would not amount to much, however I had two things going for me: an absurd amount of strength, and pre-planning by cutting halfway through said tree over the last day with a makeshift axe.

With a snap the tree fell heavily toward my position, leaning in such a way that it pinned and stunned the giant elk near the tree I had been hiding on. Once I was sure it was not going to get free quickly I jumped from my tree and landed on the one I had pulled down, then drove my spear into the spine of the elk. Unfortunately my calculations were a bit off and it did not in fact die from that, instead it attempted to kill me by whipping his antlers back. Luckily I was fast enough to dodge out of the way, only taking a slight cut on my arm from the razor-sharp bone. Leaning away from the beast's head I looked up, ready to dodge the next attack, but luck had returned to me it would seem. The antlers had bit deep into the thick trunk of the tree and gotten stuck, its neck muscles either not strong enough or too weakened by my still embedded spear to free himself.

Either way an elk lay in front of me, driven to its knees and head stuck in the tree behind it, there was nothing protecting its neck. Moving quickly to the supplies I left nearby I retrieved a sharpened shard of metal. Now armed I rushed over to the beast and drove my blade deep into the neck, cutting it open. I quickly became covered in the red blood of the beast, but I could see this as nothing but a win as I watched the beast get weaker and weaker till it stopped trying to free itself from the tree.

Taking a seat while looking up at the dead elk I simply smiled, enjoying the feeling of victory, and that I had secured my existence for another month at least. I was so happy I almost missed the cracking of the twig behind me, but enhanced hearing seemed to have also been on the menu for this body. Quickly I pulled myself up and turned around, preparing to defend myself and my kill. Then I saw the biggest damn wolf I had ever seen in my life. The beast was bigger than me and though I wasn't yet sure about all measurements I swore it was bigger than a horse. Carefully the beast sniffed the air, looking at me and then at the elk. And it was not hard to see what was going through its mind, though for some reason it felt smarter than I would expect of a wild dog. It was most likely trying to determine if fighting me for the elk was worth it.

Before me was a heavy fight and I didn't want it, too much of a chance of severe injury that could spell my end, I needed a plan and I needed it fast. Grabbing my knife I stepped back till I was closer to the giant elk then, looking over to it, I bit my lip. There was an option, but would the wolf let me go for it? Well, it was do or die so better to do. With no fear I turned my side to the wolf and began cutting pieces of meat from the elk, as large as I could make without causing too many damages to the hide, then carefully I ripped it free and turned to look the wolf in the eye as I walked towards it. Showing no fear I laid the meat down between us.

Then I took a step back. The wolf turned its head to its side as if thinking then walked over and grabbed the meat in its mouth, before trotting away. Now free of the beast I let out a sigh of relief, the wolves could be bribed, that was good to know. I had already figured out something by meeting the local fauna, there was no way I could take all of this meat back to my cave in one go. Though I was hoping the cold weather would help keep the meat for some time, I knew that it would also draw predators. My plan from the beginning had been to abandon the meat as soon as I was sure it would be too much trouble, but if I could bribe… no if I could give a tribute to the wolves to let me take what I needed. Perhaps then things would work out in my favor.

The real question was how far could I push the wild animals into doing what I wanted, dogs had originally been descendants of wolves though I doubted I would live long enough to see that. Perhaps more deals and contracts could be made with such creatures, if they were smart enough to understand the basic economics of paying a tax to hunt on their territory what opportunities presented themselves.

Smiling, I got to work harvesting the meat and hide from the dead Elk. I didn't know how long I had before the next wolf came into my area, so I better act fast.

Salaryman

Two weeks, two long weeks with no human contact. I don't think that happened to me even during some of my hardest study sessions in school. But now it had, and though I was getting used to being alone it was somewhat galling. Were there no humans other than myself on this planet? It felt like it sometimes, but if that was so why had I crashed here? There must be some purpose for that second chance at life. Being brought back from a near-death experience simply to wander about a frozen hellscape made no sense to me.

Was this just how death worked? Were cycles of reincarnation real? And if so, why did I remember my last life? Or was there more than one life... A few nights ago I had been hunting a bit further out, having clothing allowed such travels. I had traveled down the mountain, much further than ever before, and found the environment only getting colder and the odd thought popped into my head that it was colder than a Russy winter. What was Russy and why did I know what its winter was like? Something seemed sealed off behind foggy headaches whenever I tried to remember more of what happened after being pushed in front of a train, but something told me that whatever was there was important.

I found something of a schedule over the weeks, I start my days preparing and making tools and clothing. Turning hides into usable clothing was a bit far outside my skill set but I figured out how to make something to keep my limbs and body warm with wrappings tied to my body with strips of hide, and improving from there. I had a lot of hides to work with from that first kill, and by the second week, I got two more kills so I had plenty of hides to experiment with. I also found that the horns of those elks were incredibly sharp, they made my metal look like comparative jokes with how effective they were. I quickly replaced the tip of my spear and knives with elk blades and made myself a few more weapons. Now that I could tie them to my clothing, having multiple spares gave me better chances of survival.

And then, most days, I would go out hunting like I was now. I would simply salvage meat from my last kill as well but I would spend some time tracking the monstrous elks and other animals. For the most partI tried to avoid the beasts as they all seemed over-aggressive, goring anything that got too close, which is why I tended to use the ability to climb trees to my advantage. I suspected humans must exist on this planet somewhere at first, by their reaction to me, thinking that perhaps island tameness would have set into them if they had never seen a human before. But with how harsh this planet was perhaps there was just always a war for resources between the animals? With the size of the prey and predators, it was not impossible.

I also had more encounters with the massive wolf, gave it its tribute of my food, and found the original body had been pulled off to who knows where. At this point, I believed that it had to be the top predator in the area, with how it kept popping up I was willing to bet this entire region was its territory. So long as I showed it respect and gave it the first slice of meat from my kill, I believed I was safe from it. More to the point I was starting to think the wolf was a lot more sentient than some of the animals I had seen in this life and my last one. Something about its eyes was just too intelligent, I had seen dogs aplenty in my last life, even played with one in Norden, and they never seemed that… Norden?

I had been walking through woods, looking for anything useful, when that name popped into my mind. As soon as that name appeared in my head I stopped walking, stumped. Where had that name come from and why did I remember a dog, a real dog about my size, not the large monsters of this planet, running beside me. Pushing at the memories only got me a headache again, coughing I shook the thought away. Whatever had been lost to me seemed to be returning slowly, and in the woods while surrounded by creatures that could rip me apart if I dropped my guard was not the place to get lost in thought. That could wait till later today when I got back to my shelter.

Which had improved greatly. I had found a hot spring nearby, that wasn't poisonous as far as I could determine. It being on a hill with a shallow 7-foot cliff not too far away from it, it only took a few well placed logs and mud to form a trench and turn said cliff into a warm shower, something that was just a damn good feeling after getting covered in blood and mud from my hunts. I didn't trust the water for drinking, of course, but getting muck off me was useful, not to mention more hygienic.

Something I frankly was looking forward to after tonight's hunt, it was damn cold today compared to the day before and I was a bit worried if it would get worse before it got better. If so I had to start planning for a hard winter. Right now I was having no trouble finding game, but I didn't know if that would last. Better to store up now than to be left to starve.

Shaking my head at the thought of what needed to be done I started walking in the direction of home when I heard a wolf's cry. A pained wolf cry, part of me told me I should ignore it and head home but then again, if something was attacking my landlord, I better see what was going on.

Gripping my spear tightly I quickly moved through the woods, running over rocks and areas of heavy snow, in order to not give away my approach. Following the sound of the wolf, I quickly came across a strange sight. In front of me was the wolf who I had been paying tribute to, looking hurt as it protected a hole on the side of the mountain. In front of said wolf and between us were three yeti, I was a bit stumped as to what to call them but that was really what they reminded me of: the giant snow monsters of Himalaya that the gullible believed were real. The 7-foot white-haired beast were wielding clubs made from tree limbs and were roaring something to each other as they surrounded the wolf. The wolf in question looked a bit banged up but overall not too badly wounded. I almost used that justification to pull out, and perhaps that it only mattered that I pay the tax but not who I paid it to… That was until I saw the human skulls tied to the yeti belts that looked a bit too much like human skin for my taste. This changed my calculations in a moment, the beasts were a threat to my life and they needed to be dealt with before they became a problem.

Hefting my spear up I took aim and let it fly, my aim was not as good as I would have liked but the elk blade buried deep in the back of the beast in front of me. I had expected a scream of pain or something, instead it toppled forward. Apparently I struck its heart? Good to know that it was on the right side of the upper body, instead of the center-left like a human.

The other two and the wolf looked at the fallen beast in shock, which gave me a chance to move quickly from where I had struck to another position by the beast to the left of the wolf. Taking a breath I drew my bladed knife and rushed out of the woods. The beast to the right of the wolf made some sound, most likely a warning, causing my target to whip around toward me but I closed the range quickly enough that I was able to smash into it with all my force and drive the blade deep into its right chest. The beast quickly tried to hit me but its forces, already greatly reduced by the damage it had received, could not be brought to bear properly against me becauseI was so close to it. The blood did more damage to me than its hits, as I felt it burning around my gloved hands and had to rip them off. The damn yeti had acid blood like a xenomorph, who saw that coming? Well, not me. I also didn't see the last living yeti that had closed range with me. One moment I was on top of a dead yeti, the next I was sent flying into a snow embankment while feeling several ribs had been broken and leaving my knife in the body of the downed yeti.

Coughing in pain, I looked up from where I lay to watch the yeti approaching me and raising its club to smash my head in! And got to watch the wolf rear up behind the yeti and bite down on its head and pull. One sickly pop later the yeti head rolled off to the side and the body, now spurting blood from the neck, toppled over like a felled tree. Even with the amount of pain I was in I could smile at that. Sure I was not going to be hunting for a while but I had a stockpile of food near my camp buried in an ice hole, I just needed to get home and rest.

That smile faded as the wolf walked over toward me till it was standing over me menacingly. I had just seen it rip a yeti's head off so I doubted it would have any trouble with mine. So I did fear for my life, and if I hadn't left my knife behind when I went flying I would have raised it to protect myself. In fact, I saw my short second life flash before my eyes as the wolf opened its jaws. Only stopping when it grabbed the back of the hide poncho I wore. My confusion only lasted a moment as it pulled me toward the cave it had been protecting. Once inside the wolf let go and let me roll deeper into the cave. I came to rest by two more wolves, smaller and by my guess younger. Possibly the wolf's pups. Before I got a chance to bemoan my luck tha I was about to be wolf chow, the mama wolf licked my face and laid down by my other two wolves followed her example a moment later. Leaving me to wonder… What the hell was going on?

Writers note: A little bit of a reason behind this,... blame some nice artwork of Leman Russ as a chick looking a bit like an adult Tanya, and the cloneya thread for making this idea seem… 't expect this to come out too often, more focused on the bleach fic but thought this idea was funny enough I give it shot.

[SPOILER][/SPOILER]

Edited by: Members of the Tanya Discord that contributed to the Editing: BlueBezerk, FallQM, Pierre

Community edited:

Community editable doc (Chapter 1) No story suggestions in the community editing document, Keep all story suggestions and comments in the thread

Art thanks Sky66 who Commissioned the Artist J-likes-to-draw