Chapter One: Pills, Portals & Potions

"Gloria? Gloria! Your eyes are gonna rot out of their sockets if you don't get off your damn computer!" Rolling her eyes—which were not rotting out of their sockets—Gloria ignored the screeching sound of her aunt's voice bouncing off the barren walls of their shared apartment. She didn't want to move in with Aunt Sherece in the first place, but after being laid off from her office job, she had no choice. During the day, she was an editor-of-all-trades online. By night, her aunt knew what she was up to. Gloria thought she deserved a little time for herself, especially seeing as Aunt Sherece didn't respect her office hours in the first place. She wouldn't have to play her games so late at night if she stopped barging into her room asking her to do things in the morning while she was at work. She always forced Gloria to play catch up all night, only sparing a little time for her game before she went to sleep.

"Just one more hour auntie, please?" At twenty-two, Gloria was mortified to be asking to stay up past her bedtime. But, what could she do? There was no way she was sleeping in her beat-up car again, and her aunt made it clear that if she was going to stay with her, it would be under her rules.

"Fine! But one more hour and that's it. Tomorrow you need to find a real job! And, for God's sake, can't you clean up a little while you're at it? Anyway, goodnight and I better not hear any damn cymbals clappin' or horns tuttin' waking me up." A door slammed in the distance, and it took everything in Gloria not to yell back at her that her "fake" job gave her real money to pay her aunt's bills.

Turning her attention back to her screens, Gloria cracked her knuckles, pushed up her glasses, and got to work. [REALM] had just released the most massive expansion in its ten-year history, and there was no way she was missing the launch of a new realm, new classes, and special gifts for all [GRAND] level players because her aunt was convinced she'd go blind from staring at a computer. Gloria just knew she was going to end up number one on that week's global ranking chart which meant one thing and one thing only.

"I'm going to make you a star!" she whispered to her hand-sewn plushy of her favorite NPC in-game. Gloria blushed, turning to gaze at her wall to wall, and floor to ceiling shrine made up of fanzines, official posters, fan art, comics, and limited edition figurines of her not-so-secret virtual crush. The so-called infamous alchemist Zoran Lazarectus was a bunch of flashing pixels with the barebones of a backstory behind him, but Gloria couldn't help herself when it came to buying up merch of her favorite henchmen. Who else had the time to devote their online life and hard-earned cash to a man that barely had three lines in special events?

"No one but me," Gloria said, poking the crooked nose on her plushy, "I hope the Demon King doesn't make an appearance in this arc. He's such a jackass! And he hogs up all your cutscene time."

Grinning to herself, she barely registered a notification flickering at the corner of the screen. She clicked on it and nearly jumped from her chair with joy. Someone was requesting to join her queendom in [REALM], Devotees of Lazarectus. It wasn't every day that happened. After all, her queendom was made up of herself, her long-distance pen pal RubenX9X, and a Russian player that was always online when Gloria and Ruben were asleep.

"Huh?" Instead of a familiar notification, an odd message overtook her dual monitors. The message stated: "Ye have ventured to the edge of the realm, Grandmistress. Thou art brave, wise, and true. Gather wormwood from the Valley of Death and mix it with the tears of new-born Fae. Ye shall unlock the Eternal Elixir and with it, immortality and a portal to a new realm! Dost thou accept this quest?"

There was no way to decline the quest disguised as a friend request. Even more strange, [REALM] had entered the equivalent of the Victorian era three expansions ago. There was no way the server should be spitting out "ye olde" English in the first place, let alone for a quest she'd already completed. Gloria slapped the side of her screen, then the other, wondering if the update had introduced bugs into the system. When nothing seemed to work, she gave up and gave in, clicking {accept}. Almost instantly, cymbals starting clapping together and horns blared, signaling she'd completed the quest.

"Thank God I put my headphones in...!" Gloria frowned as the message disappeared, and sure enough, a bottle of Eternal Elixir was added to her inventory. She clicked it and pressed {use} without a second thought, assuming she'd get the familiar boost in XP. However, her screen glitched then crashed all together. It was like a surge of power went through the whole side of her wall, as the lamp, TV, and alarm clock also shut off.

"Oh no. Oh no! Oh crap, oh crap, oh crap!" Bolting to her feet, Gloria paced around her workstation, freaking out. She tried unplugging plugs and rebooting her hard drive, but nothing worked. Her computer had gone to its digital grave right after her avatar swallowed an elixir claiming to make her immortal.

Slumping back in her chair, Gloria's mind went totally blank. Not only was she going to miss the expansion, she'd also just lost her only source of income.

"I should... I should really wash up. Yes, that's it! I'll wash up, grab a snack, and come back. It should turn itself back on by then." She threw up her hands, putting her fate and job security in the hands of the electricity company.

Standing up on shaky legs, Gloria slowly stripped and entered the bathroom next to her room and personal office. After scrubbing down and crying in the shower, she went back to her bedroom. Opening the window, she let some fresh air hit her face, trying to clear the fog of terror settling in her mind. Since they lived on the first floor in a gated elderly community, Gloria didn't feel too worried about being half-naked in the middle of the night with her window wide open. She reached over and grabbed her miniature Zoran Lazarectus, cradling the homemade doll to her chest. She wondered vaguely if she should just throw herself out the window and call it a life. But, Gloria stopped herself. She'd most likely end up with scraped knees and a twisted ankle, and that wouldn't look good when she started interviewing in person.

"What am I going to do now?" Gloria asked no one in particular, bringing the doll's face to her lips in a gentle kiss.

"Face your destiny, wench," a brooding male voice replied, something sharp nipping at her bottom lip.

"H-huh?" Gloria screamed, thrusting her doll away in horror. Zoran's still face transformed, displaying a crooked grin instead of a serene smile. Before she could react any further, a surge of energy like lightning knocked her off her feet—literally.

Her glasses flew forward, and Zoran was suspended somewhere mid-air. Next thing Gloria knew, she was lying face down outside, half her body in the rose bushes, the other half slumped on the cobblestone walkway. Then, everything went black.