HOPE

November 16

LIENNA

"Hope! Hey babe. How are you?"

I smile hearing him.

"I am good and how are you?"

"Ughh I am missing you so bad babe." He says with a dramatic sad voice as I chuckle hearing him speak like that.

"Well, just two more days," I say as I balance the phone against my ear and shoulder and bend down to pick up the pillow I kicked in my sleep earlier.

"Don't you miss me hmm?" As he says this, I pause. Do I miss him? I do--' No you don't. Who are you trying to fool? You know you don't feel anything for him yet you are giving him false hope! You love Sam!' My mind says to me, so done with me not choosing it, with me thinking it's always the mind that's wrong. I contemplate telling him the truth. But then...'He calls you Hope! For what? Don't do this to him. Forget Sam and try to be loyal to him. He is your fiance!'. I gulp when my heart reminds me of a few things. Taking a deep breath, I decide to go against my mind like always.

"I miss you too." I lie. I am going to crush his hope soon. I feel disgusted by myself.

....

12:00 PM

"Ma'am? I will be leaving now. Take very good care of yourself." I nod with a smile and get up to hug her.

"You too Amy. Thank you for being here with me like a sister. You took amazing care of me. If it wasn't for you I would have still not healed." She smiles sweetly and returns my hug.

"If you weren't determined then no one could have healed you. And if it wasn't for the love Sir has for you maybe even you yourself wouldn't have been able to heal you."

My heart clenches as the realization hits me like a truck. He really loves me. He loves me immensely, deeply, unconditionally. And me? I am a fucking liar. She backs away from the hug and looks at me with saddened eyes making me confused.

"Though I helped you to heal physically, I know your inner wounds are still not healed. And the one who can heal them is neither me nor Sir. Go to the one who can heal those wounds so you can have a peaceful life." My breath hitches hearing her words. Gulping hard I look away from her eyes like a thief trying to hide her crime after being caught red-handed. She gives me a half smile and says again.

"Please heal yourself Lienna. Let him heal you." I look at her as I bite my lips to not cry.

"How?"

"Go to him, talk to him. Ask him to free you. Ask him to forget you."

Tears fall from my eyes automatically when I hear the last sentence coming out of her mouth. She knows there was someone before Conor in my life though she doesn't know who. She knows we loved each other more than the word love itself. And now she is telling me to ask him to forget me? Free me? This isn't possible. I know it and he does too. What we had can neither be ever forgotten nor be hated.

"Take care." She says giving me a last hug while I stand numb. Nothing is coming out of my mouth right now, nor I can move my body. It's like I know I am bound to suffer, and I am waiting for the storm to come lift me off my feet and throw me hard on the ground. 

... 

"Umm....ma'am?" I flinch and look at the lady standing at the reception counter.

"U-uh yes....sorry." I apologize as I realize I was spacing out thinking about the talk between me and Amy this morning.

"It's ok. Who do you wanna meet?"

"Sam Christian." She looks at me apologetically as soon as I say his name.

"I am so sorry but he said he should not be disturbed until he gives his next order."

I sense my heart beating faster as I release a deep breath, smile softly, and look at her.

"Can you tell me when he gave this order?"

"Umm three days ago." So, since the party? He doesn't want to meet anyone...?

"Can you....can you tell him that the lady from the party 3 days ago has come to see him?" She frowns at my choice of words as I just smile at her lightly.

"But---"

"Please..." Seeing my desperation she sighs and gives in.

"Hello, Sir? I--I am sorry but there is someone to meet you...N-no sir....sir she says its urgent. I know...sir please listen to me..."

I sigh and take the phone from her as she looks at me perplexed.

"It's me, Sam." I simply say these 3 words and give them back to her in her hand while she still stands like a mannequin. I nod to the telephone as she regains herself and clears her throat before taking it back to her ear about to say something, maybe an apology. But she seems appalled listening to the other side and says in a quick hush voice.

"Y-yes sir. Sure." Keeping the telephone back she looks at me, first with disbelief, then amusement as I raise my brows at her.

"Y-you can go, ma'am." I smile at her and give her thanks.

"Thank you miss," I say leaving her stunned self but just as I am about to be out of the ear, I hear her say

"She is so beautiful but...different."

I chuckle hearing her. I am wearing a white knee-length elbow-sleeved chiffon dress paired with white high heels. My dark brown hairs that reach my half back are curled slightly at the end creating a wavy look. It's decent and doesn't reveal anything too much as it has a round neck. Ignoring all the stares I am currently receiving; I enter the lift and smile when I find it empty.

....